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10 Great Holiday Decorating Ideas
1.First things first. Set a plan or a theme for your Christmas decorating. It doesn’t cost a thing to have a good plan, and when you are working with budget ideas, this is what pulls your ideas together, and makes everything you do look purposeful,...

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The Benefits of Titanium Rings
Titanium is an elemental metal with a wide variety of uses. Since its accidental discovery in 1791, titanium has been used to make aircraft, sporting goods such as golf clubs, automobile parts, watches, and rings. While titanium rings may not be as...

Tips for Choosing Log Furniture
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Wedding Planning: Involve your Fiancé in 10 Easy Steps

He's popped the question. You've chosen a date. And now, you're swimming in a sea of euphoria with no horizons. Good thing, too, because there are literally a thousand things to arrange before the big day.

You do the research, buckle under and dive in. But you find your fiancé's ardor for the event itself seems to have cooled. It's not that he isn't mad about marrying you; after all, he is a great guy, even if he can't tell a Vera Wang from a Gunny Sack. It's that his preparation style is hands-off, to say the least. And planning a wedding isn't a job built for one.

So what to do? Here are ten ways to involve him without increasing both of your stress loads:

1) Delegate areas that have a prayer of interesting him.

The worst thing you can do is expect him to match your ten to twenty years of feminine wisdom on the relative merits of buttercream vs. fondant.

Here are some probable no areas when roping in a reluctant wedding planner:

  • Selecting the cake frosting

  • Choosing the favors or favor packaging

  • Selecting the wedding colors or floral arrangements

Then there are the potential maybes, fraught with fewer hazards:

  • Choosing the photographer

  • Choosing the videographer

  • Arranging the rehearsal dinner

  • Arranging the all-inclusive honeymoon

  • Renting big, tricky items like outdoor tents

These are probable yeses, well worth running by your guy:

  • Selecting the DJ or the band

  • Setting up and maintaining your wedding website

  • Researching and selecting charities, if you choose to donate instead of giving out favors

  • Setting up the carriage, limo or other transportation arrangements

2) If you ask him to help you choose vendors and styles, narrow down the choices first.

It's a jungle of options out there, enough to give the most natural-born party planner pause. So if you want his opinion on photographers, invites, flowers or cakes, narrow down the options to three or four. He's less likely to feel overwhelmed, and more likely to feel like an important part of the process.

At times, it'll feel so good to share the load that you'll be tempted to drag him into the buttercream debate despite your better instincts. At these times, take a deep breath, count to ten, and call your mother or your maid of honor.

3) Ask him directly for help. Let him know how important his input is to you, and that you can't do it without him.

Guys like to be needed. Your frank request for help may be enough to pull him out of his comfort zone and onto your team.

4) Try the Art Director/Production Staff approach.

If you think your guy wants to help, but feels uncomfortable playing "art director," give him "production staff" tasks. Have him make the payments, pick up the food or decor, handle the rentals, do online comparison shopping, or reserve the hotels and reception halls. These are all jobs that will take a load off your shoulders, while freeing up time for the aesthetic stuff you probably enjoy and he doesn't.

5) Get a calendar and put all the planning in black and white.

Your fiancé probably doesn't have the first clue in what goes into a wedding.

Get your wedding planner, write it all down,


and show him. Once he gets over the shock, you'll both probably be able to identify areas that interest him. Make lists of the things you've each agreed to do, and cross them off as they get done. At the very least, he'll be far more supportive when he sees what you're going through.

6) Weave his family heritage/ethnicity/traditions into the ceremony.

What did his parents do? He might be surprised at the question, but it could lead somewhere valuable. He might ask his parents about their wedding, and find your wedding consequently enriched. Look through their wedding album together. Are his ancestors German, Polish, Italian, Croatian, Asian? Incorporate some old-world traditions into your ceremony.

7) Don't bring him in too early.

Treat your fiancé as a bit of a pinch hitter. Sure, you may be fully aware that you can shave 5K off your costs by starting your favor crafts and reservations 18 months ahead of time. But if he's like most guys, the wedding won't become real to him until it draws closer. Expect him to jump in about six months before the actual ceremony, and break into a (relative) frenzy of activity about one month in advance.

8) Talk about something besides the wedding.

Guys aren't the only ones who complain about brides-to-be talking of nothing but upcoming nuptials. Sometimes, even girlfriends get overwhelmed by all the wedding chatter.

Spend some time alone chatting about anything but the wedding. See a silly movie, split a hot fudge sundae, or watch a basketball game. Do something spontaneous that reminds you both of why you decided to marry in the first place.

9) Check your subtext for hidden meanings.

Tempting as it might be, make sure you're not using your fiancé as a coin-toss tool (ever noticed how people flip coins to find out what they really want?). When you ask for his opinion, take it seriously. And when you give him ownership of a task, don't second-guess every step.

Imagine that your fiancé has told you he's going to draft a dream team in his fantasy football league, and it's going to cost him $20K to participate. Now imagine that he's told you your help is supremely important to him.

You'd be a little hesitant to give opinions, right? Some of your ideas might sound feeble, even to your own ears. Hopefully he'd welcome your thoughts, however odd it felt for you to venture them. Now imagine your fiancé feels kind of like that when it comes to the wedding.

10) Remember that men become wedding experts by having one.

Chances are, your sweetheart will open his eyes to the wonder of a wedding by the time the rose petals are tossed. Forever after, he'll be examining friend's receptions with a practiced eye, and anticipating the next excuse for a Really Big Shindig.

So keep him around, and count on throwing a first-rate anniversary celebration ten years down the road. In a way, that'll be the party that really matters, won't it?

Blake Kritzberg is the proprietor of: http://www.favorideas.com. Visit the site for easy, elegant, unusual, and affordable wedding favor ideas, wedding favor FAQ, and free wedding screensaver. This article may be freely reprinted so long as this resource box and URL are preserved.


 

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  • 101 gift ideas for every occasion

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  • 5 best free child games for your preschooler

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  • 5 ways to super savings internet shopping

  • 6 tried and true fun ways to educate and entertain your preschooler

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  • 6 useful tips to cut wedding costs

  • 7 quick ideas anybody can use to make beautiful scrapbooks

  • 7 tips for burning the perfect candle

  • 8 spray tanning tips

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  • action points for effective grandparents

  • aircraft ownership is the time right

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  • an easter treasure for your family

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  • a dash of cinnamon a pinch of the past a smidgen of the future

  • a fun and easy valentines craft ages 2 5

  • a gathering of friends for the fall season

  • a great time for a holiday

  • a look at patriotic lapel pins

  • a minute can turn into hours for the child of a work at home mom

  • a special kind of love

  • babies how to get your children excited about the new arrival

  • baby christening gift ideas

  • baby name trends from classic to hip

  • baby poems for saying whats on your heart

  • baby shower centerpieces that double as a gift

  • baby shower favors to spice up your baby shower

  • baby shower for mom and the ladies

  • baby shower themes

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  • beading for fun and profit bracelet beading birthday parties

  • beat your examiners with exam techniques

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  • benefits of wedding reception dollar dances

  • beware knock offs how not to get ripped off

  • birthday party ideas for children ages 2 12

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  • boating safety

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  • boost your childs brainpower with sudoku

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  • breaking the mold creative boys bedrooms

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  • christmas crafts for kids an excellent article about christmas crafts you can do with your children

  • christmas decoration storage 10 quick tips to save you time and money when storing decorations

  • christmas gifts and celebrations that wont break the bank

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  • creating and selling craft patterns

  • creating maintaining a gift chest

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  • cutting wedding costs a brides guide to sanity

  • decorate for christmas

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  • emphasizing the spiritual side of christmas with our children

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  • expand your childs knowledge part 1

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  • family bonding activities for thanksgiving

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  • fashion and beauty for your destination wedding

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  • fight back against the wave of greed teach your kids to make home made gifts

  • finding the perfect bridesmaid gift

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  • five solid reasons why your child can be an achiever

  • fleeting gifts

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  • help prices keep going up

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  • index

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  • information about majolica pottery

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  • looking for birthday party ideas here are some great ideas

  • make a fairy garden for your kids party

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  • make gift baskets for fun and profit

  • make gift baskets for fun profit

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  • make gift wrap paper

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  • make your own greeting cards

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  • making a childs handprint on a ceramic tile

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  • making your own flower arrangements

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  • mommies and me special time

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  • new fantasy series captivates young readers

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  • paste paper craft

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  • photography 101 part 2

  • photography for your jewelry and craft website

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  • planning a special wedding shower

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  • precious stones v s semi precious stones

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  • quick and dirty holiday decorating

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  • quick guide to making your own wedding invitations

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  • raising a self sufficient teen

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  • retirement planning for the stay at home mom

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  • stans legacy my fathers impact on his 13 children

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