What really helps us to handle rejection is to recognize that there is a part of our minds which ALWAYS takes disappointment seriously. This part connects us to childhood emotional feelings of insecurity- something we all have experienced. Any disappointment, frustration, and loss will make us feel anxious and small, what I call a "child state."

The key to handling rejection is to have COMPASSION for such young feelings. All too often, people(especially men) are self critical when they feel vulnerable-e.g. "Why am I making such a big deal of it" This only shames us and makes us feel bad.

What REALLY works is when we

When you don't get a raise at the office, for instance, it is important to remember that child state feelings are evoked in that situation as well. The key, once again, is awareness and compassion for such feelings. Doing so can have amazingly positive effects on enhancing future success!
About the Author

Norm Ephraim,Ed.D. is a psychologist in Boston, Mass. He is theauthor of MOOD SHIFTING: UNDERSTANDING AND TRANSFORMING YOUR NEGATIVE MOODS. This 3 step program helps you transform negative and pessimistic moods into more positive and productive ones. His web site is http://www.mood-shifting.com.