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A Brick Wall
Direct Answers - Column for the week of August 18, 2003
Two years ago I divorced, and there is still a lot of hostility.
My former husband has been served with contempt papers for not paying child support. He says I am sending him to the...
An Engagement Ring Won't Bring You Soup When You're Sick
Many women, including me, have been groomed for marriage from the moment we emerged from the womb. After my daughters were born, I can't tell you how many people told my husband, "Hey, that's two weddings you have to pay for, Buddy." (His...
Children's Discipline: How To Resolve Divorce Parenting Differences?
Did you know that inconsistency on matters of discipline gives double messages, produces anxiety and can be very confusing to your children? Children need to know where they stand in their behaviors. It is therefore critical for parents to resolve...
How can a father win custody of his children?
Why do women win custody in Family Court? Why are men "allowed" to see their kids every other weekend and required to pay child support? The reason behind this is simple - women take the time and effort to learn how the system works. Many fathers...
Weddings For the Guests of Honor � The Bride and Groom
Weddings are the first chance for a couple to exemplify what their lives together will be like. It can be stressful, exciting and typically brings out the best and worst in the people involved. Parents may want to be too involved or the groom (or...
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Children And Divorce
A recent statistic shows that almost half of all marriages end in divorce. Divorce is difficult for everyone involved, but maybe the hardest on children. Most often they experience many feelings that they do not understand. They go through a range of emotions and need their parents to understand. If you are going through a divorce getting to understand how your children are dealing with it is important.
When parents divorce they often put their children in the center of arguments and a game of emotional tug of war. To avoid this sort of thing parents need to work together. Even though their marriage is over they are still parents together. The child needs to understand many things about the divorce. Parents need to keep in touch with their children and understand the many feelings they may be having. Older children, especially, can go through periods where they act out as a way to cope with the divorce. Many times children feel the divorce is their fault. They may worry about the future and how to deal with other events, like parent�s day at school. Both parents need to show the children that they can work together and not fight. At the same time it is
important to let the children know that you are not getting back together. Establishing some sort of family structure is a necessity to help children get back to �normal�.
Children will react different depending on their age. The following list explains a little about each age group and how they react to divorce.
Age 3-5: Regression to a more infantile state, problems sleeping, fear of separation
Age 6-8: Fantasies of parents getting back together, open emotions
Age 8-11: Anger, treat one parent as good the other as bad, take a caregiver role
Age 12-18: Depression, violent actions, judgmental of parents, develop anxiety about own relationships
Learning to help your children cope through divorce is possible the most important step in the divorce process. Children have no choice in the matter and may feel completely left out if their feelings are not recognized.
About The Author
Stephen Kreutzer is a freelance publisher based in Cupertino, California. He publishes articles and reports in various ezines and provides divorce resources at http://www.aboutdivorces.info.
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How to Divorce As Friends - Featured on Oprah - Bill Ferguson |
Advice, recommended books, and telephone counseling to help couples resolve difficult issues connected with divorce or even save their marriage. |
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An electronic journal providing information and referrals for people facing divorce. |
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John Crouch speaks about divorce law reform and presents a paper by John Crouch and Richard ... To find out how to work on divorce reform in your state ... |
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Divorce Busting� - Solve Marriage Problems, Save My Marriage, Save ... |
Divorce is not the answer to marriage problems. Stop your divorce and save your marriage with advice from Michele Weiner-Davis. |
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