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Coping With Divorce Anger
Successfully releasing your anger will help you begin healing after your divorce. Right now you may feel a great deal of rage at your ex-husband. You might be thinking that if it weren’t for him, your life wouldn’t be so messed up. These feelings...

Divorce--When "Forever" Is Just Too Long
Are you unhappy with your spouse and your marriage? Are you seriously thinking about divorce? No matter how you deal with it, divorce is a messy process. When two people, who have taken a vow to stay together forever, decide that forever is much...

How Wives with Cheating Husbands Can Gain the Upper Hand
Too many wives with cheating husbands put up with their husband’s infidelity because they feel they have no choice, or they don’t know what else to do. If you’re in a similar situation, don’t despair. You have more power and control than you...

Secrets Of Successful Marriage
Marriages are taken for granted. After the honeymoon period is over, couples co-exist. Most of the time without any charm in their married life. Everything becomes a routine- eating, sleeping, everything becomes highly predictable and dull. If kids...

Today's Woman
She is a guide, mentor, mother, nurturer, wife and friend. Today's woman is a new woman in ever changing new world. She gives, and she takes, only what is earned. She speaks up even when it feels uncomfortable. When life gives her lemons, Today's...

 
The Joys of Being Healthy

It is amazing to be able to say I am a whole, happy, healthy, loving woman. I was sick for the first 40 years of my life. Like millions of other human beings I grew up immersed in the family disease of alcoholism. For generations it has plagued my family. The unbalanced life I led is so common in our society; I didnt know anything was wrong. I was a participant in the chaos, confusion, neuroses, pain and suffering which is present in dysfunctional families. I call it The Dance of Death.

I grew up in St. Louis, Missouri in the community of Clayton. The only memories I have of my father are when he would beat my brother and me with his belt so severely my clothes would cling to the bloody strap marks on my legs. He would make us wait for our punishment in our room before he dealt the ugly blows. My mother closed her eyes to what was happening. Both of them partied on weekends where I would find empty highball glasses scattered all over the living room. I had holes in th e soles of my shoes while my mother would model a new diamond cocktail ring, winnings from a weekly poker game. My dad was also a compulsive gambler. He died at the age of 45 when I was nine years old.

My mother attracted another alcoholic to her life soon after my fathers death. They had a symbiotic, codependent and addictive relationship. Every ten days they would consume a case of scotch which was delivered to our apartment from the local liquor store. My mother never appeared drunk but she was distant, selfish and narcissistic. My step fathers disease had progressed to the point he was visibly inebriated most evenings. His attitude was condescending, nasty and self righteous. He was verbally abusive and drove his car while intoxicated on many occasions. When I think back to that period of my history I remember keeping my personal life secret!!! I was ashamed of their behavior. I pretended all was well and I began developing neurotic habits for self preservation.

In my teens I danced several days after school, participated in theater groups, worked in a department store and had creative life in my head. I imagined the way I wanted my world to be and was in denial as to the truth in front of me. I became obsessive, compulsive and an over achiever. Because I worked so hard I accomplished a lot for a young girl but the reality was it was inspired by fear, insecurity and a need for control.

In college I devoted myself to art and earned a B.S. in Education and a M.A. in Painting and Ceramics from the University of Missouri. I was hired as a college instructor soon after graduate school. I felt happy for a time because I was away from home and involved in teaching. I took my job very seriously but the loneliness I felt when I was by myself was debilitating.

I longed for love . . . any kind. I didnt realize it at the time but I had never felt affection. I became preoccupied with thoughts of men. I had guys on my mind constantly! I was popular and had many choices but I picked the ones who I thought needed me. Most often they were from dysfunctional families. I dated a lot of drunks during my 20s. It felt familiar. In spite of my success as an artist and a teacher, I had low self esteem and I knew something was wrong with me.

In l969 I began a new life in another city. Within a week of moving to Boston, Massachusetts, I was brutally raped and hospitalized. I never received help with this trauma and didnt properly grieve until years later. I pushed down the pain and was then, more than ever, resolved to create the perfect life for myself, (as if it were in my hands?)

This was made easy for me when Joey Haudel entered my life. He filled the position of my Knight in Shining Armour, albeit, distorted. He was young, handsome, and alcoholic and had just been released from prison. We needed each other like ducks need water. We bonded in a codependent relationship that lasted 12 years.

Our experiences together were astounding. What I learned about myself was profound. Our journey is almost unbelievable. I have told this story in a dramatic narrative, I Survived: One Womans Journey of Self Healing and Transformation on DVD. It is filled with the dark world of illness and moves to the light of wellness. I reached my bottom after years of suffering. I was contemplating suicide but was saved by the Grace of God and the dear voice of a telephone operator who kept me on the phone for over an hour.

I spent years in recovery; beginning with Al-Anon meetings in 1973, several series of Adult Children of Alcoholic Therapy Sessions, individual therapy with numerous therapists and devouring self help books. I had the courage to look within and face the demons. It wasnt easy and many times I wanted to quit. I often felt I was too depressed to get well. One step at a time I forged ahead and never looked back! I visualized a healthy prognosis. Today I am living that beautiful picture!

I am happily married to a man 19 years my junior. What makes our relationship extraordinary is that my husband was born in 1960 the year after I graduated from high school. I am older than his mother. We recently celebrated our 17th anniversary and continue to share the most fabulous life. The secret of our success is our deeply committed love for one another. We enjoy a passionate romance. I wish what Bryan and I have could be sprinkled over the world like angel dust.

We met in 1985 during a rainy winter in San Francisco. We were neighbors on a tiny street near the historic Mission Dolores. The worst storm of the season was on its way and my roof was leaking profusely. I was in dire straits financially, having been newly divorced. I was preparing to fix it myself. Unfortunately my ladder wasnt tall enough. I needed help. None of the folks I knew were home that Saturday morning but I noticed an open door directly across from my house. I hurried upstairs to the second story flat in the azure painted duplex and walked down the long corridor to the living room. There on the sofa was a guy watching the football game on T.V. I introduced myself and then proceeded to ask for his assistance. He looked at me like I was nuts. The silence was deafening. How often does a stranger enter your apartment with a request for help with a major repair? I was flushed with embarrassment but was in too deep to recover. Fortunately he agreed to help me.

This uncommon beginning signaled the magic that lay before us. The sparks flew. We went on our first date within days of this meeting. Bryans car was broken so we took the bus across the city to an authentic Moroccan restaurant where we sat on paisley cushions and ate with our fingers. I remember clearly how primitive this felt and how natural it was to be with him. He didnt seem the least bit concerned about my age. I, on the other hand, was more sensitive. I was still healing from the codependent relationship of 12 years and had never experienced true intimacy. I wasnt sure it was the proper thing to do but I couldnt help myself; I was falling in love. I was scared because these feelings were coming so quickly.

Bryan moved in with me within weeks of our first meeting. I remember thinking if it didnt work out it would be easy to ask him to leave because all he owned was a T.V. For Valentines Day he created a hanging wire mobile in the shape of intertwined hearts and presented it to me


with flowers and chocolate. This type of thoughtful gesture is typical of Bryan. He has never missed a special occasion and has often surprised me with jewelry when he returns from a business trip.

One evening in the spring we were waiting to board a dinner train in Mendocino. A drunken man approached us and said, How come you two are dressed up? Are you getting married? Bryan looked at me and said, Yes, we are arent we? That was his proposal. It was decided we would plan a wedding for later that year. But, first I needed to meet Bryans mother.

Just the thought of it terrified me! Bryan and his mother, Sharon, have a rare bond. He insisted he would not tell anyone about our engagement until she and I met. We drove to southern California where Sharon was visiting her sister, Bryans aunt. I felt sick the entire trip. I knew in advance he was going to take his mother shopping the next morning alone to break the news to her. I couldnt sleep at all that night. What felt so right to Bryan and me was unusual, especially in the eyes of a parent. When they returned from their excursion Sharon looked like she had just come from a funeral. Fortunately, for me, Aunt Toby accepted the situation and eased the tension by giving me a white angel ornament. His mother is a wonderful woman. In spite of her disappointment, she welcomed me into their family. Over the years our relationship has evolved into a unique friendship, a cross between a peer and a sister.

December 7, 1986, dressed in an ivory colored Victorian gown, I was driven to our wedding in a horse drawn carriage. I remember the sensation well. As I heard the clip-pity clop of the hoofs hitting the pavement I felt it was the happiest day of my life. The ride was several miles long and I enjoyed cars honking loudly at every turn. When we arrived at the elegant Alamo Square Inn Bryan was waiting to escort me inside to the nuptials. It was a good thing he took my hand, for as I exited the carriage, my knees collapsed from shaking so hard. The day was spectacular marking a lifetime of love.

Both Bryan and I had always wanted kids. By the time we met my biological clock had run out. He told me he would rather marry a woman he loved deeply than to wait for someone to bear his children. For several years we were content to be a unit of two. After my dear Aunt Letha died in 1992 I longed for a child. Bryan agreed to adoption. It was an arduous experience requiring patience and resilience. We had several birthmothers who changed their minds for different reasons. This process took three years and a great deal of money. Ultimately we were blessed with a baby girl we named Mariah. Our daughter is now 8 years old and the light of our life. I am grateful I am able to be a good parent and I relish every moment I spend with both of them as a family.

Bryan continues to be my rock, strength and loving support. During our years together I have had many tragedies including: my brother Johns suicide in 1988, my ex- husband Joeys death from alcoholism in 1989, and my girlfriend Debras suicide in 2002. I was hospitalized with a potentially life threatening blood clot in my lungs in 1998. Bryan stood by me through all of these. I married a great guy! I am a fortunate woman to have found true love in the heart of a younger man.

Each day I thank God for the gifts I have been given. I see my world as peaceful and balanced. My mission is to inspire people to their own healing and recovery. It is truly possible to find serenity, joy and love. If I can do it, so can you.

To learn more about Kay Kopit visit: www.isurviveddocumentary.com

Contact: Rhonda Boudreaux


Office: 510-236-2668


Mobile: 510-236-2668

Kay Kopit, accomplished artist, actor, writer, speaker and gifted teacher.

Kay Kopit grew up in the Midwest town of Clayton, Missouri. At the age of sixteen she choreographed as well as designed and made costumes for several high school productions. Here she found her passion for art and theatre.

Kay attended the University of Missouri where she received a B.S. in Art Education and M.A. in Painting and Ceramics. While in college she continued her interest in theater production succeeding in choreography and costume design for several major productions, including Carnival and Once Upon a Mattress. After graduate school she taught Life Drawing, Design, and Ceramics at the very prestigious Stephens College in Columbia, Missouri.

In 1969 Kay was inspired to move to the East or West Coast. By the flip of a coin (literally) she decided to move to the East Coast where she made Boston, Massachusetts her home. She was immediately offered a position teaching art at Lexington High School. After several successful years teaching Kay was determined to pursue a career in the arts and theatre and moved to California.

Kay moved to San Francisco where she trained with Wendell Phillips of the well-known Stagegroup Theatre. For several years she studied acting, dance, public speaking, and playwriting with reputable names such as Elizabeth Huddle of A.C.T., Peter Layton of The Drama Studio of London at Berkeley, and Sue Walden of the Improvisational Workshop.

Kay had continued success in her acting and modeling career. She appeared in many national commercials including: Dreyers Grand Ice Cream, Hunt Wesson Foods, Totinos Pizza, Shaklee, and many more. She acted as the principal spokesperson for several Industrial Films including: Chevron, Firemans Fund, Zenger Miller Productions and American Protective Services. Her print work was extensive including: Ketchum Advertising, Safeway, and Emporium-Capwell.

Kays good business sense and devotion to teaching inspired her to open her own pottery in Marin County, California. She founded and operated, Clay In Mind, a ceramic school and gallery in San Rafael. This venture led to Clay In Mind II a manufacturing plant in San Diego, California. After many productive years the opportunity to sell came and Kay felt it was a good time to do so.

Most recently, Kay is the writer and producer of a documentary of her life story, I Survived: One Womans Journey of Self-Healing and Transformation which covers 15 years of living with an alcoholic. Although Kay was successful in her life, behind closed doors she endured pain, shame and emotional maiming. Her story is being told to help others overcome the debilitating disease of codependency.

Kay is now living an amazing life with her husband Bryan of 17 years (who just happens to be 19 years her junior.) To complete their family they adopted a daughter at birth when Kay was 54 years of age. Besides being a mother and wife she continues with her love of painting, writing, teaching and speaking on the subject of codependency. Her passion is not only the arts but to help people through her inspirational story. Her courage, stamina, and faith have given her direction and the gift of helping give others hope. Kay has several published articles and writing a monthly column for Recovery Times.

Read more about Kay Kopit at www.ISurvivedDocumentary.com.

Contact: Rhonda Boudreaux


Publicist


Kay Kopit Productions


510-367-5990


rdboudreaux1@aol.com


 

divorce.co.uk - advice on mediation, counselling and legal aspects ...
An overview of divorce in the UK, including the law, mediation options and emotional support, from Mills & Reeve.
www.divorce.co.uk
 
Divorce Magazine, information about separation and divorce
Divorce Magazine is a compassionate self-help resource for people in need of information about separation and divorce.
www.divorcemag.com
 
Divorce - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Divorce or dissolution of marriage is the ending of a marriage before the ... A decree of divorce is initially granted 'nisi', i.e. (unless cause is later ...
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DivorceNet - Divorce Net: Family Law Information, Solutions, News ...
DivorceNet® is the Internet's largest divorce resource, offering state-specific articles, an online community and a nationwide directory of divorce lawyers, ...
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The Divorce Support Page: Divorce, Child Custody, Alimony, Support ...
a support site for people experiencing, divorce, dissolution, separation, custody, alimony, visitation, etc. Divorce professionals to help you in your area.
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A state specific divorce web site providing information and referrals for people facing and experiencing issues revolving around divorce, separation, ...
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DivorceInfo Surviving Divorce Managing Lawyers Alimony Child Support
Divorceinfo -Survive your divorce with some money in your pocket and your dignity intact.
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Divorce - Wex
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MedlinePlus: Divorce
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Divorce Aid :: Online Guide to UK Divorce Law, Information and Advice
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Divorce-Online :The UK's leading low cost divorce service
The largest free online divorce and separation resource in the UK with information, forums, chat, experts and articles.
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How to Divorce As Friends - Featured on Oprah - Bill Ferguson
Advice, recommended books, and telephone counseling to help couples resolve difficult issues connected with divorce or even save their marriage.
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Welcome To Divorce Online ~ www.divorceonline.com
An electronic journal providing information and referrals for people facing divorce.
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Federal Magistrates Court - On-line Application for Divorce
In the short-term, please use the Application for Divorce form which can be found at ... Our E-mail address for family law enquiries (including divorce) is ...
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DivorceCare: Divorce Recovery Support Groups
DivorceCare is a divorce recovery support group where you can find help and healing for the hurt of separation and divorce.
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Divorce Central Home Page
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Divorce Helpline — tools to keep you out of court
Providing information about divorce, and referrals to family law attorneys.
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Divorce and relationship breakdown : Directgov - Parents
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Americans for Divorce Reform, Inc.
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  • all i want for christmas is my son back

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  • an empty nest is for the birds

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  • attitude

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  • a birds eye view of the enchanted self and what it means to you part 2

  • a birth announcement that is both practical and sentimental

  • a brick wall

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  • a kernel of truth about relationships 5 steps to improvement

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  • a look at men women and marriage can it work

  • a mechanical metaphor

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  • a wedding for what

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  • becoming free of debt

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  • been there done that

  • being authentically you

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  • be thankful for a faithful husband

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  • be the samurai sword

  • birthparent loss and grief

  • blessings in a mothers tears

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  • breaking bonds

  • brin in the coach im ready to play

  • building your house of faith

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  • business partners and marital partners will the marriage survive part i

  • business partners marital partners will the marriage survive part i

  • career and jobs how to live with a workaholic

  • catch 22

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  • chasing after child support

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  • child support 5 key things every parent should know

  • child support how does it work

  • child support its all a matter of record

  • choosing your divorce method

  • close kept secrets to weight loss lesson 5

  • comfort comes from unexpected places

  • coming out as an internet dater

  • committed parenting

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  • confusion of american men when it comes to women a brief overview

  • contested and uncontested divorce

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  • cyberbegging new wave 2003

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  • dating tip getting the commitment

  • dealing with adversity

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  • deciding on divorce

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  • defending your relationship

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  • dinner scooped off the floor

  • discovering infidelity one womans story

  • divining with ordinary playing cards

  • divorced and penniless why it can happen to you

  • divorced parent do you alienate your child from the other parent

  • divorce actually makes us stronger

  • divorce advice getting divorce advice from the right source

  • divorce and children things to consider when youre staying married only for your children

  • divorce and children things to consider when you re staying married only for your children

  • divorce and effects on children

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  • divorce articles how to get the most from a divorce article

  • divorce decision things to consider when making a decision about divorce

  • divorce reasons what constitutes a viable reason for thinking about or wanting a divorce

  • divorce secrets to coping with a divorce announcement

  • divorce when forever is just too long

  • does a woman have a place

  • does living in a loveless marriage necessarily mean that you should get a divorce

  • does marriage counseling work

  • does your sexless marriage have you thinking about divorce

  • domestic violence against women and children

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  • down low and debatable

  • do it yourself divorce

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  • do you know who i am

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  • dressing the mother of the bride

  • dyi divorce

  • dyi divorce papers

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  • emancipation

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  • empty nest syndrome

  • essence of infidelity

  • essential ingredient

  • exceptions to the rule

  • extramarital affair should you get a divorce just because one of you had an extramarital affair

  • extreme breakup recovery maximum healing minimum time

  • e book on russian women part 10

  • e book on russian women part 6

  • false start

  • family law

  • family meetings kids discuss the d word

  • family mental illness coping

  • family ties when to let go

  • faqs about internet dating

  • fears of womens mind and its way outs

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  • feng shui atrracts money

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  • fighting back

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  • finding the honey in honeymoon lingerie

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  • five christmas survival tips for the divorced single parent

  • five effective ways of saving marriage

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  • focus on who and what you want

  • following through

  • forgotten again part 1

  • forgotten again part 2

  • forgotten again the saga continues

  • forty something

  • for every ten new year resolutions nine will fail heres the missing secret about motivation

  • free divorce do it yourself forms

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  • give and take recipe for success in marriage

  • go between

  • grants for single mothers

  • harsh reality

  • have a simple small green wedding

  • have you missed your soulmate

  • healing the abandonment wounds

  • healing the mid life love crisis

  • healthy sex prevents illness

  • helping children cope with death

  • helping children cope with grief

  • helping children to cope with divorce

  • helping your family survive a home makeover

  • helping your kids handle divorce

  • help im single for the first time in years

  • help your marriage survive the rough spots

  • her last day in court

  • he called her mister the novel

  • he said she said communicating with the opposite sex

  • hidden divorce costs

  • holy mantrimony

  • homeownership could it be in your future

  • home for the holidays is it time for that talk

  • home improvement for ladies

  • housewife is that all you are

  • how a 21st century dad can make a positive impact on his children

  • how can a father win custody of his children

  • how do i know if i am being a good parent

  • how i learned to love my buddha belly

  • how not to have a friendly divorce

  • how the challenge of single parenting affects your decision to divorce

  • how to be holy

  • how to buy a house with no credit

  • how to buy christmas presents and not break the bank

  • how to create a good self image

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  • how to grieve a tragedy

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  • how to have a stress free holiday

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  • how to identify what the question should i get a divorce means to you

  • how to make a relationship work

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  • how to meet 250 million mates

  • how to prepare for marriage

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  • how to reorganize your divorce life for happiness

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  • how to stop divorce make everything about both of you

  • how to stop divorce parental conflict from bursting

  • how to survive break ups

  • how to win against impotence

  • how wives with cheating husbands can gain the upper hand

  • human conditioning stress management and music

  • identity theft the perfect victim your child

  • if you really need a dating quiz maybe you shouldnt be dating

  • improving your self esteem

  • index

  • infidelity again

  • infidelity investigation warning signs of wife infidelity and how to catch that cheating wife

  • infidelity who cares

  • interview with author of gods blueprint for a healed restored marriage

  • in love dont throw the baby out with the bathwater

  • is conflict healthy in marriage

  • is it self esteem or self confidence or what lies in between

  • is she cheating many unsuspecting husbands find out too late

  • is there life after love how to get the spark back in our love lives and avoid splitsville

  • is this the one

  • is your baggage holding you back

  • is your internate date lying to you

  • is your lifes purpose for sale

  • is your marriage problem severe enough to warrant getting a divorce

  • its a great day to die

  • it pays for single christians to date other like minded people

  • i am woman hear me roar the female homebuyer and seller part 1

  • i am woman hear me roar the female homebuyer and seller part 2

  • jackie kennedy was the perfect introvert

  • jewish dating it pays to date like minded people

  • juggling your way into balance

  • keeping a marriage happy

  • keeping faith

  • learning to trust again

  • leaving the child behind recovery from child abuse

  • lessons about marriage learnt from riding a bike

  • lessons from the ultimate declutter

  • let your children help you prepare for the big move

  • life in the comic zone

  • life lessons an inspirational story

  • living in the clouds

  • living through loss

  • ll elderly family members and friends need to be safe

  • lobster the food of romantics

  • long lasting love relationships

  • loveless marriage does living in a loveless marriage necessarily mean that you should get a divorce

  • love and marriage fairy tale

  • love discrimination

  • love makes the world go round

  • making love last

  • mama dies

  • marriages may end but families are forever

  • marriage and sexual relation

  • marriage children and divorce when le music stops

  • marriage divorce and kids

  • marriage divorce separation how to handle the split loyalties after separation

  • marriage licenses las vegas style

  • marriage miscommunication root cause of problems

  • marriage or divorce check your social security number

  • marriage problem is your marriage problem severe enough to warrant getting a divorce

  • marriage saving advice have a soul connection with your spouse even if all seems lost

  • marriage seperation a practical guide

  • marriage what happened to the fairy tale

  • mate seekers

  • may i divorce and remarry

  • mens online dating email tips

  • men collect and shelve women trophies author marc rudov blasts unilateral pursuit in article about the golden rule

  • mid life and looking for a guy help is here

  • misplaced allegiance

  • moral armors irrational parenting part i

  • more than mom and dad

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