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ADD / ADHD Children : Being Your Child's Best Friend
Do you live with an ADD / ADHD child? If so-- my hat is off to you! ADD / ADHD children are brilliant, full of energy, smart as a whip (as grandma says), and tons of work. They are also the rising sun and the setting star: meaning much of life...
Family Meetings 101
Family meetings provide opportunities for feelings to be aired and validated. They also allow younger children to feel they are an important part of the decision-making process when it comes to family vacations and other major and minor family...
Jump off the Stress Express--Bring Back the Holiday Spirit with Family Christmas Traditions
'Twas the week before Christmas and all though the house everything was in shambles. Too much to do and not enough time. More shopping to be done, presents to wrap, cookies to bake and decorating await. Oh the hustle and bustle, the extra work and...
Survival Kit for the Holidays: Grace, Gratitude and Random Acts Of Kindness
If you*re like me, the holidays always have a way of sneaking in. And - like an unexpected visitor who shows up the week I haven’t cleaned my home - I’m caught in a frenzy, desperate to scrape up the tumbleweeds of cat fur and make the place...
Teen Driving Statistics
As a parent, if you search for any information about Teen Driving Statistics you will find statistics similar to those below. I have reviewed various websites to summarize the information from these sources, however, please feel free to search the...
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Best Gift For Your Child
This in my opinion is the best gift parents can give to their children. And it doesn’t cost anything, causes no botheration.
The events that I am going to describe started when my daughter Shruti was about 6 years old (now she is 17). One day she came rushing to me back from her school with a request. “Papa will you please write a story for me? I have to submit a story in my English assignment.”
My first reaction was that thoughts like these flooded my mind – “Is it right for me to do her assignment? Isn’t she supposed to do it herself? Will I suppress her creativity if I help her? Should I enforce discipline more strictly?”
In spite of my apprehensions, which I tried my best not to show, I readily agreed to write a story for her. I didn’t exactly write the story, I dictated it to her. During dictation there was some discussion and final outcome was with our mutual consent. In her next term exams she got highest marks in her class which gave me some consolation that my doubts were perhaps unfounded.
This trend continued for several years. Very often Shruti would approach me to help her in home assignments and I was always quick to respond. Jointly we wrote several stories, essays, real life incidents, biographies. But those nagging thoughts were always at the back of my mind. However, Shruti continued to get highest marks in her class and I didn’t think it necessary to change my approach.
Gradually Shruti started doing more and more assignments by herself and in last two years or so she has not asked for my help. She still tops in her class and has turned out to be an exceptionally talented person.
When I look back over the years it gives me lot of satisfaction that I did not waver from my precept of upbringing a child.
What was it that Shruti wanted when she asked me to write a story for her? Was it only a story that she wanted from me? Certainly not. Story was only a medium to share her excitement with me.
What she wanted from me and what I gave to her can be best described by this term – INVOLVEMENT. This is in my opinion the best gift parents can give to their children - involving them in your affairs and getting involved in their little affairs. Everyone wants to feel important and everyone wants recognition – even the child.
Involvement with your child emotionally is one way of acknowledging that the child is an important member of the family.
What really matters is how the child perceives and interprets the situation. How parents perceive the situation is of little consequence even if parents feel that their intentions are the best in the world. By establishing an emotional bond parents can ensure that the child gets the correct message. This helps the child in developing emotional maturity, attaining emotional self-dependence and imparts confidence in dealing with people.
The child may not visibly seek attention from the parents all the time. But whenever the child approaches the parents or other elders, the child deserves to be given proper attention. If for any reason parents cannot immediately give time, this can be explained to the child honestly. Remember to be truthful to your children - they can detect when people are not honest with them and then start feeling unwanted.
Here in this article I have narrated how I helped Shruti with her assignments. But whenever she approached me for anything, I always tried to give her my fullest attention. I believe this approach helps child to develop the skill to reach out to people and get favorable response from them. This is an important element in the development of interpersonal skill.
Early formative years decide a person’s attitude later in life. Emotional growth of a child is as important as physical and mental growth. This is what forms the basic character of a person. Parents need to ensure that child’s own self-image is properly created by proper emotional inputs.
To sum up, the most precious gift which can be given to the child is the sense of self-esteem, self-respect. This is a quality or attitude which prepares the child to face the world with confidence. To help children attain this quality the role of parents can be vital. They need to demonstrate truthfully how much they care for the child’s feelings.
Sanjay Johari contributes articles regularly to various ezines. His website contains information, articles, resources, opportunities and more for small business owners and home based business owners.
http://www.sanjay-j.com
Join the longest running internet business opportunity - because it works!
http://www.sanjay-j.com/empowerism.html
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| Family Research Council: Wednesday, December 6, 2006 |
| Christian organization promoting the traditional family unit and the Judeo-Christian value system upon which it is built. Provides links, commentary, news, ... |
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