|
|
Beauty Tip: Foundation Secrets For A Flawless Complexion
1. For a natural look your foundation must match your skin tone. Test foundations along your jawline. You will know the best color because it will disappear into your skin.
2. Spread foundation on your hands and pat it on your face, then...
Big Fine Women
Sometimes those of us of the male persuasion don’t like to admit things that we hold deep inside for fear that we’ll be made fun of. All of you men out there know exactly what I mean - if we admit we like to burp loudly, then we’re accused of...
Charming Trends in Jewelry
Fashions that owners and their dogs can share.
The wearing of charms dates back to 400 or 500 BC, when they were believed to hold special powers -- particularly the power of protection. By the 1890's charms had evolved into a fashion...
It Won't Grow Back Tomorrow
I remember clearly the day that I had my ultrasound, and the technician informed my husband and I that we had a baby girl on her way to join us in this world. That very day, my husband made clear that our daughter would not get a haircut until she...
There Are Always Time For Women Shoes Shopping
It has been known for centuries that women have been dressing up since long time ago and will be for centuries to come that they also going to wear different kind of shoes. When there are a crowed of women, there are always be some interesting...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
I Yelled at My Kids
I really hadn't meant to yell. But the aftermath of it lay before me. My son was a wimpering mess on the floor and my daughter sat statue-like on the chair in front of me.
As I sat there considering my next move, it occurred to me that I needed to do something quickly. The deafening sound of silence reminded all of us that an ugly moment had just occurred. And a voice inside me continued to insist that my kids were at fault.
"OK, you two, I'm sorry I yelled like that, what a dumb thing to do!" As I moved toward my son, it became evident that he wanted no part of me. "Get away from me!" he shouted.
I thought better of telling him not to yell at me, so I did the only thing I could think of doing. "Crabby Daddy is back," I proclaimed as I transformed my hands into pincers and crawled in crab-like fashion towards them. "I love to yell at children, then eat them!"
My son continued to yell at me to go away, but now he was laughing and crying simultaneously. My mission to undo the damage my yelling had caused was underway. I’d been able to recover quickly this time, but I knew that this moment would be remembered for awhile.
Most importantly, I wanted to remember what had really happened. What happened was that I wasn’t disciplined. I failed to control my emotions in a way that my children could emulate.
Were my children misbehaving? Absolutely. Is there a part of me that wants to blame them and let them know how badly they were acting? No question. But this is the part of me that serves my ego. It shows my children how to avoid responsibility and blame others. It’s not my “best self.”
And it’s our best self which we must always search for when we’re with our children.
Our kids don’t need perfect parents, and they won’t get them. But they do need parents who strive to get better. I’m reminded of the words of Emerson, who said, “When a man lives with God, his voice shall be as sweet as the
murmur of the brook and the rustle of the corn.”
If in our lifetime we could speak to our kids with a voice this sweet, it would be enough.
But until we reach this level, what should we do after we yell at our kids?
Here are five ideas:
1.Recover quickly – Recovering emotionally (or faking your recovery) will make it much easier on your children and show them how to be resilient themselves.
2.Apologize, but don’t overdo it – It’s important to say you’re sorry, but don’t dwell on it and don’t show signs of pity. This will help create a victim of your child faster than the drop of a hat.
3.Avoid finding ways to blame them – It’s incredibly easy to blame your kids when you’re angry. It’s OK to say, “When I saw you hit your brother I felt angry,” but avoid saying, “You made me angry.” You’re responsible for your own anger—teach this to your children.
4.Process the incident with them – Children can be traumatized by yelling, and it helps to talk about what happened for each of them. Ask them questions about it and allow them a chance to talk about it if they’d like.
5.Don’t beat yourself up about it – You don’t have to envision your kids twenty years from now telling their therapist how you screwed up their life! Kids are pretty resilient and they’ll recover, especially if you follow these steps and keep working on yourself.
While we’re not perfect, we can still search for the voice as “sweet as the murmur of the brook and the rustle of the corn.”
It might even keep your kids out of the therapists’ chair.
About the Author
Mark Brandenburg MA, CPCC, coaches men to be better fathers and husbands. He is the author of “25 Secrets of Emotionally Intelligent Fathers” http://www.markbrandenburg.com/father.htm For more great tips and action steps for fathers, sign up for his FREE bi-weekly newsletter, “Dads, Don’t Fix Your Kids,” at http://www.markbrandenburg.com.
|
|
|
|
|
fashion net - the guide to all things chic |
Directory of selected chic fashion, art, luxury, shopping, and work sites. [English and Japanese] |
www.fashion.net |
  |
Fashion TV - HOME |
International TV channel dedicated to fashion, broadcasts 24 hours a day on satellites and cable systems. Site features programs and lots of info on fashion ... |
www.ftv.com |
  |
Style.com: the online home of Vogue and W; Fashion, Fashion Shows ... |
Portal of Vogue and W magazines. Detailed coverage of designer runway collections and style news with a list of job opportunities and links to other Condé ... |
www.style.com |
  |
Vogue Articles, Features, and More on Style.com |
Magazine features and articles, fashion show coverage, celebrity style, fashion trend reports, party and award show coverage, shopping guides, and more. ... |
www.style.com |
  |
Fashion for women -- fashion designers, latest trends, fashion tips |
Fashion for women: a comprehensive guide to everything about women's fashion including current fashion trends, information about fashion designers, ... |
fashion.about.com |
  |
Fashion & Style - New York Times |
Fashion & Style · Dining & Wine · Home & Garden · Weddings & Celebrations · Travel · Jobs · Real Estate · Autos · Comedy on the Hot Seat. By ALLEN SALKIN ... |
www.nytimes.com |
  |
Fashion - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia |
The term "fashion" is frequently used in a positive sense, as a synonym for ... In this sense, fashions are a sort of communal art, through which a culture ... |
en.wikipedia.org |
  |
fashionoffice.org : trends in fashion - Europe . America . Asia |
fashion magazine - international trends in fashion, style, design, photo, film, art, beauty. catwalk TV, shows, photo stories from New York, Paris, London, ... |
www.fashion.at |
  |
Fashion, from the concrete to the catwalk | fuk.co.uk |
London designer interviews and runway archive, photo shoots, street style, weekly updated news and a fashion clinic. |
www.fuk.co.uk |
  |
FASHION Magazine |
The web component of Canada's general fashion title, with fashion, beauty, gift ideas and online competitions. |
www.fashionmagazine.ca |
  |
Telegraph | Fashion |
Fashion Director Hilary Alexander looks at an expanding market. ... Fashion 'Oscar' winner Giles Deacon is to join luxury label Daks, reveals Hilary ... |
www.telegraph.co.uk |
  |
Telegraph | Fashion |
Fashion 'Oscar' winner Giles Deacon is to join luxury label Daks, ... Buying vintage is more than a fashion trend, it's a good investment says Maria ... |
www.telegraph.co.uk |
  |
Fashion Jobs | Fashion Jobs at 24 Seven Inc. |
We're 24 Seven Inc., the number one source of fashion jobs and talent for the ... Our success at connecting the right people with the right fashion jobs has ... |
www.fashion-jobs.biz |
  |
Fashion History Costume Trends and Eras, Trends Victorians - Haute ... |
Pauline Weston Thomas and Guy Thomas place costume alongside the social history of an era, focusing on fashion from 1800. Includes undergarments, haute ... |
www.fashion-era.com |
  |
Fashion Planet: Summer |
New York-based site looks at collections, trends, personalities and global lifestyles with monthly updates. |
www.fashion-planet.com |
  |
New York Fashion -- New York Magazine - Designers, Fashion ... |
Fall Fashion. rachel weisz The Sexes Get Dressed. For her? ... Spring 2007 Fashion. philosophy and versace European Shows. The best of the big collections. ... |
nymag.com |
  |
New York Fashion -- New York Magazine - Designers, Fashion ... |
The recently maligned country struts its stuff at a fashion show in Manhattan. ... Fall Fashion. rachel weisz The Sexes Get Dressed. For her? ... |
nymag.com |
  |
Fashion Icon |
Features latest trends, dressing tips, an ask the fashion experts column, and fun craft projects. |
www.fashion-icon.com |
  |
Fashion News on Yahoo! News |
Cameron Diaz, Kate Winslet Shine at "The Holiday" Premiere Fashion Wire Daily ... JAKARTA (Reuters) - Mention the words Islamic and fashion and most people ... |
news.yahoo.com |
  |
Hint Fashion Magazine |
Hint Fashion Magazine, featuring fashion news, model pages, photo shoots, designer interviews, beauty reports, party pictures and message boards. |
www.hintmag.com |
  |
|