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After Christmas Letdown?
“You gotta pay the price,” one of my clients is always telling me. She’s referring to what is a law of physics, and also the way things work – what goes up must come down. The higher your Christmas, the more exciting, chaotic and tumultuous, the...

Deliverance from the Root of Bitterness
Scriptural Text: Ruth 1:1-6 Background on the Book of Ruth This book was probably written during the time of the Judges. Please note Ruth 1:1. Ruth was a Moabite woman who married an Israelite man. The book of Ruth is said to have happened...

Fear and Faith Cannot Occupy the Same Place
The product package and design meeting had been cancelled. The marketing staff was notified there had been another shooting. The interstate was a parking lot. Traffic jams and roadblocks were a daily routine. No one felt safe to travel in or...

How to Grieve a Tragedy
Bad things happen to good people. Have you lost your job or are facing bankruptcy? Has a cherished relationship ended or you have gone through a divorce? Maybe you received diagnosis of a serious health problem. Or maybe you are mourning the loss...

You Want to be a Stay-At-Home Parent
The subject of stay-at-home parenting is touchy, and emotionally tangled up in a maelstrom of emotion, advertising, society pressure, culture demands, and personal beliefs. When you have a mixture of that many ingredients swirling around, the result...

 
Increase Acknowledgment for More Ease in Your Relationships

In a program on "Power Thinking for Better Living," there was a woman named Sherry in the audience—and she was frustrated. She said she was doing a decent job of managing her life; her problem, she stated, was her husband and her teenage son. She continued, "They don’t listen to me; they do not seem to notice all that I do for them, and they never help out."

At work or at home, it is easy to point the finger at other people and say that they are our problem. However, blaming others just leads to a dead end. We cannot control other people, and we will waste a lot of energy and give ourselves a lot of grief when we try.

If Sherry wanted things to be different at home, she had to find a way within her control to create change. Knowing that demanding rarely works, and that begging is too demeaning to use on a regular basis, I suggested that Sherry try acknowledging her husband and her son. Every day, she was to find one thing to acknowledge about her husband and one thing to acknowledge about her teenage son. She thought the idea was ridiculous.

I pointed out that usually she is focused on what is missing, that her current communication consisted mainly of statements such as "You never help with dinner," "You forgot to take out the trash," or "Whose socks are these on the floor?" Desperate for more harmony at home, she decided to try the experiment.

Every day, she looked for one thing for which to acknowledge her family members. At first, she said, it was hard. Soon it became easier, and soon after that, she noticed more interest in helping from her teenage son, and more closeness and connection from her spouse.

After the first week, Sherry committed to continuing this daily practice indefinitely. A few weeks later at dinner with her family, laughing and conversing, Sherry was overcome with emotion. All the members of her family were enjoying each other and sharing time together in a way they had never experienced before.

By forcing herself to focus on what was going well and acknowledging her


spouse and son, Sherry began to increase her awareness of all the large and small things that were good in her relationships. She stopped having any interest in nagging, and she started to communicate with more compassion.

Appreciating the acknowledgment and noticing her shift to a more compassionate place, Sherry’s spouse and son wanted to be closer to her and give her more support.

Don’t confuse a compliment with an acknowledgment. Compliments are usually about someone’s looks or what they are wearing; "Nice tie," "That blue shirt brings out your eyes," or "That is a beautiful dress" are all compliments. An acknowledgment focuses on someone’s behavior or character. "Thank you for picking up the dry cleaning," "I appreciate you taking the time to go shopping with me," or "It means a lot to me when you help me clean up" are all acknowledgments.

When acknowledging people, be specific; do not simply tell people that they did a good job or that they are a valuable member of the team. Tell them why. A few examples of acknowledgments are: "You are always so good about setting the table before I ask," "I really value your opinion," and "Thanks for your help getting the kids off to camp; that really took a lot of creative problem-solving."

Start right now to focus on increasing your acknowledgments, both at home and throughout your life. Getting good at acknowledgment will take some time; pretty soon, though, you will find yourself acknowledging people naturally, with ease. You will find more closeness, camaraderie and fulfillment in all your relationships.

Caterina Rando, MA, MCC, is a success speaker, life coach and author of the national bestseller "Learn to Power Think." She helps people invigorate their lives and create the results they want with ease. To find out about her programs, book and other resources, visit http://www.caterinar.com. Caterina can be reached at 800-966-3603 or by email at cpr@caterinar.com.


 

Center For Grief, Loss and Transition, St. Paul, Minneapolis ...
The Center for Grief is a St. Paul, Minnesota provider of specialized therapy and education in the areas of complicated grief, trauma, and life transition.
www.griefloss.org
 
Grief Loss & Recovery | Poems, Articles & Personal Stories - Home
Grief poems, articles and personal stories about grief, loss, recovery, bereavement, death, dying, funerals, spirituality, suicide, depression, ...
grieflossrecovery.com
 
Grief Loss & Recovery: Articles
Grief poems, articles & memoirs about grief, loss, recovery, bereavement, death, dying, funerals, spirituality, suicide, depression, afterlife & God.
www.grieflossrecovery.com
 
Grief, Loss and Bereavement
Pregnancy loss, Dealing with the death of an adolescent peer.
www.ncpamd.com
 
Coping With Death, Grief, and Loss Handout
Coping with Death, Grief, and Loss. What is Grief? Grief occurs in response to the loss of someone or something. The loss may involve a loved one, a job, ...
www.uiowa.edu
 
Dr. Phil.com - Advice - Health - Grief/Loss
Mind and Body · Grief/Loss · Pregnancy · Life Strategies · Money · Parenting · Relationships/Sex · Self Matters · Weight ...
www.drphil.com
 
Open Directory - Health: Mental Health: Grief, Loss and Bereavement
Bereavement Poems and Articles - Poems and Articles connected with grief, loss and bereavement. Includes links and an online memorial tribute. ...
dmoz.org
 
Grief and Loss, Funeral Arrangements, End of Life - AARP
Offering articles, discussions, resources and tools for coping with grief and the loss of a loved one.
www.aarp.org
 
Self-Improvement - Grief-Loss Ezine Articles
EzineArticles.com allows ezine or email list publishers to upload or download free expert content that can be used within email newsletters or websites.
ezinearticles.com
 
GriefLoss.com | Grief Loss | Grief Digest | Grief Journal | Randy ...
GRIEF LOSS Web Sites - Sponsored Listings. Associated Sites · Grief Counseling Tools · Grief Recovery Skills Help Others, Help Yourself ...
www.griefloss.com
 
Grief Loss and Bereavement
We shuffle into a break room and he. 1 2 3 Next >> · RSS Feed: Grief Loss and Bereavement Feed. © Copyright 2000-2006 eNotalone.com Inc. All rights reserved.
www.enotalone.com
 
Living Beyond Loss -- Surviving Grief, Loss and the Death of ...
Site focusing on surviving the grief and loss associated with the death of a child. Features online journal entries and essays.
adrr.com
 
Grief and Loss Resource Centre
Deals with the many aspects of grief. From making funeral arrangements to online memorials.
www.rockies.net
 
Hillsborough: Grief, loss felt at teen's old school
... 15-year-old arrested after car chase, crash · Grief, loss felt at teen's old school · Newborn's family shaken ... Grief, loss felt at teen's old school ...
www.sptimes.com
 
each
This page contains info about grief, stages of grief loss, stages of grieving, ten stages of grief, unresolved grief, words to comfort someone grieving ...
www.each.org.uk
 
Nicky's EB Info World ~ Welcome to the World of Epidermolysis Bullosa
EB Awareness Bracelets - Advertise on this site - Link to Us - Free Internet Access - Book Store (inspirational/helpful) - Book Store (grief/loss) ...
www.ebinfoworld.com
 
Grief, Loss, Shame & Guilt - Birth, Birthmother, Child, Grief ...
Birthmothers: Grief, Loss, Shame & Guilt. Acknowledging grief over the loss of a child through adoption, and dealing with feelings of shame and guilt are ...
birthfamily.adoption.com
 
Grief - Loss
Grief /Loss:. A Heartbreaking Choice A website for those parents who choose to interrupt their pregnancies after poor prenatal diagnosis and for ...
www.cardiogenetics.org
 
Google Directory - Health > Mental Health > Grief, Loss and ...
Resource to find consolation, emotional support, encouragement, stress management, balance, and serenity to help those experiencing grief, loss, ...
www.google.com
 
Grief, Loss and Bereavement Resources
Links, information and resources for the loss of children and parents, death and dying, support groups, healing center.
www.soberrecovery.com
 
 

 

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