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Emotional Freedom - At YOUR Fingertips!
What would you say if I told you I know of a simple method that can make emotional stress such as upset, anger, fear, concern and distress simply melt away in a few minutes and all you had to do to achieve this is simply touch a few "magical...
Personal Happiness: A Personal Responsibility
Unhappiness can be like a chronic cough, an early symptom of a more serious condition. Most people are either unwilling or unable to face up to the fact that there’s some problem eating them up enough to cause chronic misery.
I always hear...
Spending Time With Your Baby - Making The Most Of Joy.
When you first bring home your Bouncing New Baby, you will surely feel you want to watch over her and be with her much of the time, especially if you are a first time parent. Newborn babies are fascinating even if they are not yours; when they are...
The Secrets To True Wealth And Happiness
What's stopping you from living the life of your dreams? Is it your circumstances
or is it what you choose to believe about those circumstances and your ability to
change them?
The truth is; most of us get stressed when we feel we are not in...
Tips For A Happy Marriage
In January 2006, I will have been married to my husband for 29
years. We went out together for 2 years before that.
Marriage is a sacred vow to love your partner for richer or for
poorer, in sickness and in health, till ... well you know...
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Holiday Expectations
As the holidays approach, I find myself wondering how I’m going to accomplish all I expect of myself. I expect to have perfect presents under the tree for an astounding number of people who will be visiting from out of town, besides the usual round of gifts for my children, immediate family, close friends and significant others, such as teachers, school staff, hair dresser, manicurist, etc. Added to the gift buying frenzy are countless trips to the grocery and food specialty stores for the feasts I expect to prepare, again for countless people I am expected to entertain during these holidays.
What’s one person to do when it becomes overwhelming and seems there’s never going to be enough time, resources or energy to cope? Well, I’m not sure I have the answer. What I’m thinking of doing is escaping to an undisclosed location to save my sanity, health and well-being. Naturally, this isn’t an option … I hold the holidays too dear and my daughters have come to expect huge fanfare on these special days. I have set up their expectations of me, just as I have set up the expectations of myself that I might not be able to pull off this year due to an unstable health condition and the subsequent lack of mobility I’ve been accustomed to in years past. Mostly, I just want to be able to get it all done, as I have every other year, which is no longer an option so I am left to ponder my upcoming fate with the dread of not performing or of falling short.
I suspect the “expectations” will somehow be met, only because I couldn’t bear to let my children down during the most important season for meeting expectations. And I have set myself up for all of this, gladly, willingly, never expecting anything as mundane as “ill health” to interfere with our rituals and festivities. Never mind that this health condition was
caused primarily by trying to cram five weeks worth of expectations into a ten day period when I over-booked myself with work, volunteering at my children’s schools at the same time I was expected to take care of many other obligations and promises to family and friends. I think the lesson here is to relinquish the expectations of myself and scale down to a more manageable holiday routine, like it or not.
Alas, there will come a time when we parents are no longer able to perform the myriad duties and routines we’ve created for our families, for any number of reasons, and we will need to give up control of making sure everyone’s holiday expectations are met. This could come in the form of a health crisis, monetary crisis, time-crunch crisis … take your pick. This is the time to delegate the responsibility of the be-all, do-all parent and shift our focus to relishing our time with family and friends more so than relishing the accomplishments of others and our expectations of us. We are in the midst of a joyous and sacred time of year when our hearts and minds should be filled with love and good will, not with a frenzy of get-it-done anxiety.
I wish you all joyful holiday season, filled with love and happiness. Give yourselves a break and allow one or more of the details to slip by if need be. Being there for your family in sound mind, body and spirit is ultimately more important.
About the Author
Rexanne Mancini is the mother of two daughters. She maintains an extensive yet informal parenting and family web site, Rexanne.com – http://www.rexanne.com -Visit her site for good advice, award-winning Internet holiday pages and some humor to help you cope. Subscribe to her free newsletter, Rexanne’s Web Review, for a monthly dose of Rexanne: http://www.rexanne.com/rwr-archives.html
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