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Choosing your Divorce Method
The biggest mistake that people make when getting divorced is that they fail to plan. They simply decide to leave the relationship and then enter and ugly and expensive battle that ends up hurting everyone involved. There are some things that...

Parenting---Roots and Wings
I’m sure many of you have heard that old Hallmark card adage that goes something like this: Parents give their children two great gifts---one is roots, the other is wings. This is what I address in this article. As parents, we pray for our...

The 5 Secrets of "Keeping" Your Husband In Love With You
In medival times the 'keep' was the central tower that formed the heart of the castle. It was the most defended area of a castle. With that in mind, if we are to 'keep' our husband in love with us, we need to always 'keep' our husbands needs close...

The Gift of a Baby Shower
Baby Showers are certainly events which foster the warm feelings of love and happiness. They are a celebration of new life and new beginnings, not only for the child, but for the parents and their friends and family. Having a baby turns a couple...

You Better Not Lie, I’m Telling You Why…Santa Claus Is Coming
You Better Not Lie, I’m Telling You Why… Santa Claus Is Coming By Dawn Fry Holiday season brings the perennial return of Santa Claus. According to traditional lore, St. Nick flies around the world on his reindeer-powered sleigh. He lavishes gifts...

 
The Power of Self-Esteem!

Why are there so many women haunted by a low self-esteem ?

I have shared many thoughts through out my blogs on feelings, jealousy, worries, fears, and self-esteem. Every day I receive mail from all over the world from women suffering from a lack of inner power to get through the day, due to a low self-esteem. It does not only affect their relationships at home, it also follows them into their work place, where they are being suffocated from a lack of confidence. In a work place the power of self-esteem needs to be high so that ones confidence can guide them through actions such as: important decision making, dealings with an opposite sex boss, office politics, other staff members trying to gain on your efforts, talking to clients or customers on the phone or in person, dealing with rejection regarding your work, and even things as simple as fitting into the social side of your job (making friends). People deal with this everyday, and when they are suffering inside, their power of self-esteem is definitely very low. Then they still have to deal with the rest of their day. It's no wonder the corner bar looks like a nice hide-away. There are two parts to the meaning of the power of self-esteem:

1: self-acceptance, which is an appreciation of ones worth as a human being.

2: self-confidence, the knowing that you are competent enough to use your gifts to their fullest.

To have the power of self-esteem, one must be able to feel both emotions in a positive manner. Through ones life, they have learned through negative experiences to doubt themselves, to fear criticism and ridicule. They have also learned to cut themselves down at a glance of someone else they deem to be richer, prettier, or smarter. They eventually lose the power of self-esteem. We can run through our past, over and over and over again. We can bang our heads on the wall, we can create eating disorders in ourselves, we can cut up our bodies just to feel something, or we can even turn away from everyone we love and cherish for fear they may just find that one tiny keyhole to unlock our self-pity trap we are in. We can do just about anything to not find the strength to gain back the power of self-esteem. It is after all the easy road to take, is it not? To fail, to cry out for sympathy, to get attention, even if it is the wrong attention. I have learned one very important thing in all my work through helping women gain the power of self-esteem, no matter how many times you see someone prettier, skinnier, richer, taller, smarter, happier, better spoken, or with a colgate smile you envy, the sun will come up tomorrow with or without you. Your worries and self-pity caused by your weakness to control the power of self-esteem that is inside of you. It is waiting to be used as the gift that you were born with. You can spend hours hurting and suffering inside because you are not, or cannot be who you think you should have been. You must stop allowing yourself to feel threatened by the world. When your mind feels threatened, it will automatically react to protect you. This is where your thoughts and your actions collide. Confusion becomes part of your thinking now and this is when the negative emotions take over fast and furious. Into the pit, you go. The ability to shift your focus to positive mental thoughts during stress is the most important link needed to escape any emotional trap we fall into. The power of self-esteem is all about your first thought and how you deal with it. It is at that split second that you have to decide to think positively or just plain toss it out of your head. Tossing negative thoughts is something I have mentioned before,"HABITS". Your goal is to offset the mind-body reaction to the stresses we are constantly forced to deal with through society. The


power of self-esteem can be gained if you really want it. I know that I have filled my website and my articles with everything from A-Z on steps to get you there. Women are still in constant belief that only over weight woman, or not so pretty woman (by society`s standards) are at risk of losing the power of self-esteem. Again I repeat this over and over, please read ,"Why Do Pretty Girls Cry". It's all there. I speak of the pretty girls, and society`s way of convincing you that only ugly girls cry. I know that is a harsh statement, but I am trying to get through to every person on earth that the power of self-esteem is in each and everyone of us. We are all born with it. Yes we all have our reasons for our weaknesses. OK, now that we know that, lets move on. How can we fight off the negative thoughts that bring us down? Through my thoughts in my website and blogs, you can educate yourself and learn to improve your thinking habits. It is possible, but not easy at all. That is the reason so many of you fail to gain the power of self-esteem. You have no consistent learning strength. You fear anything that takes time and dedication. Then why is it that you will search endlessly through every search engine for ways to get you through this hell you are in, pay a nonsensical amount of money to a therapist to tell you what you already know, cut yourself, or make your body suffer through eating disorders, not to mention put yourself and your friends in so much turmoil over your inability to create better mind over matter habits? Can you see what I see there? I see that you do have the power of self-esteem. You do have the patience, the will and the strength to shine. You do not need to worry about anything. You choose to worry and you allow the negative thoughts. Ask yourself the next time you feel threatened, "If I do not stop this negative thought, will it change who I am, or make me that of which I envy?" NOT and NO!!!!! Please realize this, only you are suffering in that pit. Only you are losing out on all the smiles that life has right at your reach. You are in control of your happiness. You can toss off all those comments or remarks. You can turn your back on someones else's weakness or problems that may cause you to feel less than who you really are. Let them suffer in their own stupidity. No one can threaten you, but you. Do this also when you feel the challenge of negative versus positive thinking:

BREATHE DEEPLY

IDENTIFY THE NEGATIVE

NOW THINK THE POSITIVE

ACT UPON IT

BREATHE AGAIN DEEPLY

PAT YOURSELF FOR WINNING THAT WAR

NOW SMILE

YOU NOW HAVE, "THE POWER OF SELF-ESTEEM!

Trust me here, the more you create this habit, my friends, the easier it becomes. Like anything else worth having in life, it is not going to come easy, but it does come and it is oh so sweet!!!!!!

*********************************

"You cannot stop the birds of sorrow from flying over your head,

but you can stop them from building their nests in your hair."

-Chinese Proverb

Dorothy Lafrinere Owner/Operator Website- http://www.womensselfesteem.com Weblog- http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy Forum- http://womenselfesteem.proboards29.com email- dorothy@womensselfesteem.com
About the Author

Dorothy Lafrinere Owner/Operator Website- http://www.womensselfesteem.com Weblog- http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy Forum- http://womenselfesteem.proboards29.com email- dorothy@womensselfesteem.com

 

Happiness (1998)
Happiness on IMDb: Movies, TV, Celebs, and more...
www.imdb.com
 
Happiness - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
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en.wikipedia.org
 
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www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu
 
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www.twth.org
 
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An evolutionary theory of happiness must clarify the connection between the ... The cybernetic theory of happiness says that the presence of these three ...
pespmc1.vub.ac.be
 
BBC NEWS | Programmes | Happiness Formula
Visit BBC News for up-to-the-minute news, breaking news, video, audio and feature stories. BBC News provides trusted World and UK news as well as local and ...
news.bbc.co.uk
 
Happiness Foundation - Home
Copyright 2001-2006, Happiness Foundation.
www.happiness.org
 
So what do you have to do to find happiness? - Sunday Times ...
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www.timesonline.co.uk
 
CATHOLIC ENCYCLOPEDIA: Happiness
The primary meaning of this term in all the leading European languages seems to involve the notion of good fortune, good chance, good happening.
www.newadvent.org
 
TIME Magazine: Mind & Body: Happiness
Happiness is not cozy. It gleams most vividly against a background of black ... Most people find happiness in family connections and friendships ...
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Ask Dr. Kenner, clinical psychologist, any personal question toll-free. Happiness has a rational basis.
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האפינס happiness
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Dr. Seligman has developed a Reflective Happiness Program that ... Dr. Seligman & Reflective Happiness website featured in TIME Magazine cover story [more. ...
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