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7 Secrets of a Happy Marriage
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Loves mysteries in soules does grow. --John Donne I have been thinking about soulmates a lot lately. Recently a fellow relationship coach told me the story of Heather, a woman in her early 40’s. She has never married, though she has had several...
In Pursuit of Happiness
"In Pursuit of Happiness" In pursuit of happiness, what will we do as women? Whatever we possibly can. We want to do things for ourselves, but always put others before us. What's the result of this? Resentment.....we start resenting our spouses,...
THE LOVE PYRAMID - Mini Course
We must insist on this right here - up front. As St. Paul and many other brilliant scholars of the human condition told us, a satisfying life must combine faith, hope and love - with the greatest element of all being love.
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Will the Angels Abandon Us?
If we don't behave according to a specific church's doctrine, will our guardian angels turn their backs on us? If we are struggling with our overall belief in God or we're questioning the validity of the holy books, will the angels abandon us? ...
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The Ugliness of Low Self Confidence!
How fine life would be if we all felt like a million dollars 24 hours a day,7 days a week! We would never, ever feeling like we have woken up in a pit, full of self confidence lows, having the energy to just jump out of bed and meet the day with loads of enthusiasm and knowing that we are going to get through the day without worries of any kind. The sun will shine all day, with just enough breeze to keep our bodies cool. Life is good, oh so good.
NOT if you are a person imprisoned by low self confidence, it so is not. Low self confidence is a very nasty characteristic to have inside us. It makes us feel weak. It makes us lose faith in our actions and dreams. It can even stop us from going forward in our lives with relationships. It allows so many ugly negative thoughts to take hold of our minds. Some will even try to escape this gripping emotion through the comfort they feel in their eating patterns. Some begin to trust the emotion that creates mistrust, in order to derail their thinking, only setting them up for a history of jealous explosions.
We begin to act selfish, constantly thinking that every action made is directed at us in some negative way or that we are the butt end of the joke when we see people laughing and happen to be looking our way. We feel that we are being compared with others. We feel we cannot ever do anything right. We see negative in every word that is said about us. We want to share our pain and loneliness, so that everyone around us can feel equally sad. We become habitual riders on the roller coaster of self-pity. We want to be the only person in the world with any good qualities. We want our partners to see only us and desire only us. We want our partners to only have fun when we are around them. We do not allow ourselves to have fun because we are allowing our selfish habit of low confidence to stand in our way. Notice all the WE`s in this paragraph.
Our negative trap is working well, isn`t it? The trap of low self confidence is what will trigger all the lows in our emotions such as: low self-esteem, low energy levels, low sexual desires, low positive thinking, low care in personal hygiene, low desires in life period.
Imagine watching a movie, and in this movie there is a person trying to get through life struggling with all the WE`s that I have just described to you. Would you not be thinking, or if you are like me yelling, at them to STOP? Would you not be thinking of ways to help them? Weird isn`t it? The person in that movie is you, all you have to do is step outside of yourself, and your ability to fix all of those WE`s is so simple. We always think that we look funny in pictures, but when we look at other people in pictures, we do not criticize them or pick them apart. Well neither does anyone do that to our picture. We are our worst enemy when we allow low self confidence to take priority in our minds.
How does one fight
this horrible war against ones self? Habits are a very, very good way. I have done articles on habits many times. Hmm. Wonder why? Probably because it is through creating positive thinking habits that we can drowned out the negative stuff that controls are world of peace and happiness. I am not saying it will happen over night. I am not saying that it will happen after one time of defeating the negative. What I am saying is that the more we feel that we are just as special as anyone else in the world, or ask ourselves, will this issue that is causing me so much pain and agony mean anything tomorrow? If this is my last day on earth, do I want to spend it like this? Try to feel like you are all new every morning. Nothing that happened yesterday will defeat our day today. What may seem so devastating in that second, really is only because we are allowing it to feel that way. Changing your track is a very important thing. I don't care what you have to think about in order to do that, just do it. Think about anything to get your mind to change. Eventually the your mind will do that on its own. Yes, it's all habits and only you can do this. This is something you must do for you. Your self respect will guide you and give you strength. The higher you build your self confidence, the stronger all of you becomes. Then you will be able to defeat all of the negative emotions that fight to control your thinking. Do this for you. It's no different than quiting smoking, exercising, taking care of yourself, even cosmetic surgery. All of these changes can and should only be done with your best interest as your goal. No one else really cares in the end. How you live your life and find happiness is totally up to you, so kick low self confidence in the BUTT!
I know that if you really want something, you can and will get it. That's a fact my sweet people! Make the WE syndrome turn into a non selfish WE. Think of everything and everyone around you as a positive element that you need to create your positive habits. As I have said so many times: If only we lived in a perfect world!
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"You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection."
-Buddha
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"Every day I live I am more convinced that the waste of life lies in the love we have not given, the powers we have not used, the selfish prudence that will risk nothing and which, shirking pain, misses happiness as well."
-Anonymous
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About the Author
Dorothy Lafrinere
Owner/Operator
Website- http://www.womensselfesteem.com
Weblog- http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy
Forum- http://womenselfesteem.proboards29.com
email- dorothy@womensselfesteem.com
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| Happiness (1998) |
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