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50 Things to do to your Boss that are Fun for you, but not for them
1. You’re eavesdropping and you hear your boss has reservations at his favorite restaurant. You know, the one you can’t afford. Call them back and cancel his reservations – say you’re his wife. 2. Have a friend of yours make an anonymous call to...

By Now, I'm a Expert at Memory Loss
I sat down to write my weekly humor column, but I just could not remember what I wanted to write about. This seems to be an increasingly more common affliction, ever since I turned 40. For instance, like most people over 40, I often can't remember...

Five Minutes
Everyday. You're hunched at the computer, flicking the keys with the greatest of ease - or, like me, poking each stroke with the speed of a...umm...well, it DID rhyme! Everyday. You're mesmerized for hours by the wonders of Internet...

Getting Back To E-Business
It's that time of year again, folks. The calm after the holiday storm. All your relatives have finally gone home. You've settled back in at work after far too few days off. The kids are back in school. The neighbors have finally taken down those...

THINGS PERFECTLY NORMAL BEASTS DO
PUBLISHING GUIDELINES: Publishers wishing to use this article are invited to email the author a courtesy copy of their publication, for citation purposes. WORD COUNT: 566 It's amazing what "Perfectly Normal Beasts" will do in a pinch. Being a...

 
5 Reasons Why You Should Quit Your Day Job

Most of us would stop working if we could. We constantly dream about it, but that's about as far as we get-dreaming. Working a 9-5 just seems inevitable. I, Timothy Ward, however am a master at defying the inevitable. I stare 'The Inevitable' in the face and call him dirty names. I say, if you want to stop working, STOP WORKING; I'll even give you 5 reasons why you should.

1. If you stop working you'll have more time to devote to reading my articles, columns, and lists. This will enable me to become a household name down at the Unemployment and Welfare offices. My fame is a small price to pay for you living your dreams. Think about this when you see me on the 'Today Show'.

2. Quitting your job will make you feel wonderful. For about 10 minutes you'll be on cloud nine, you'll be on top of the world, you'll be living the good life, you'll be: -insert your own cliche here-. Then you'll start worrying about the car note, the mortgage, the kid's school clothes, groceries, and how you're going to pay that $850 you owe the Petermanns for running over their mailbox and a whole row of prize-winning azaleas. All this will probably depress you to the point of assisted suicide, but at least you had 10 minutes of freedom.

3. Daytime television is some of the most exciting and captivating television around. You'll wonder how you ever survived without all those quality soap operas, daytime talk shows, and judge shows where you get the sinking suspicion that the judge has been paid off. When you combine this with all the informative commercials that air during the daytime that will 'Show you how to make $1,000 a day stuffing envelopes, 'Teach you to drive a tractor trailer in 4 days', 'Allow you to get a degree from home in such exciting fields as GED preparation and septic tank scrubber' and you'll not only wonder why you didn't quit your job sooner, you'll also vow to never work again.

4. In your formerly


employed state you missed all those important calls from collection agencies and other bill collectors. Now that you have quit your job you'll be able to sit at home in eager anticipation of these oh-so-important calls. Toss in a few telemarketers, calls from the Sheriff's Association asking for donations, and a few of those computers that call you and ask you to 'Hold for an important message' and you'll have a full day of just answering the phone. It will be like having a full-time job all over again, without all the hassle of getting a paycheck.

5. Dragging yourself out of bed every morning at 5:45 a.m. can't be good for your health. Your doctor will proud of you for caring enough about your body's well-being to go as far as quitting your job. He will not, however, see you as a patient anymore because you no longer have health insurance. But there's no need to worry, after all that's why we have free clinics. Sitting all day in a damp clinic waiting room next to two teenagers with stage 3 Chlamydia is yet another experience you would have missed out on if you had kept your day job.

There you have it folks. 5 reasons why you should immediately go out and quit your job. Feel free to quote any of these reasons to your employer when you turn in your two weeks notice. If she wants to know where you came across such valuable information tell her that a unselfish friend of humanity supplied them to you free of charge, and all I asked in return was that you remember me next time you need your septic tank scrubbed...
About the Author

Timothy Ward desperately needs your help in becoming a household name. You can either visit http://timothyward.netfirms.com and subscribe to his humor column "I Never Said I Was Normal', or you can tattoo his name on at least 3 of your bodily appendages. The choice is yours.

 

Humor in the Yahoo! Directory
Find sites dedicated to all things funny, including jokes, comedy, quotes, and also humorous sites relating to animals, entertainment, and the bizarre.
dir.yahoo.com
 
College Humor
Everything that's funny on the Internet is right here. Funny pictures, funny videos, and lots of boobies.
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Open Directory - Recreation: Humor
Arts: Comics (5279); Arts: Illustration: Cartoons (135); Arts: Performing Arts: Comedy (1506); News: Analysis and Opinion: Columnists: Humor (192) ...
dmoz.org
 
Humour - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
This article discusses humour in terms of comedy and laughter. ... Mintz, Lawrence E. Humor in America: A Research Guide to Genres and Topics. ...
en.wikipedia.org
 
Humor Posters at AllPosters.com
Humor Posters at AllPosters.com. Choose from over 300000 posters and prints. Professional custom framing available.
www.allposters.com
 
Humor: See what people are saying right now on Technorati
See all blog posts tagged with humor on Technorati.
www.technorati.com
 
Political Humor - Jokes Satire and Political Cartoons
The Web's leading source for political humor, providing a witty and irreverent look at bizarre antics inside, outside and below the Beltway.
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Psychology Humor
What's the surest sign that a subject isn't really a science? They're the ones whose proponents spend the most time trying to insist that their field is a ...
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Pages tagged with "humor" on del.icio.us
All items tagged humor ??? view popular ... Reason Magazine - All I Think Is That It's Stupid · save this. by karindalziel to humor ... 54 mins ago ...
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About Humor - Comedy - Jokes - Cartoons - New Funny Sites - Humor ...
New sick jokes every weekday plus new links each week to the best in humor and sickness on the Net. From About.com.
humor.about.com
 
Funny and Humorous T-Shirts and Gifts at CafePress.com : Shop Over ...
Funny T-shirts and Gifts. Humor Gifts. Share a laugh with funny t-shirts, stickers and more! See all results... Categories within Funny T-shirts and Gifts ...
www.cafepress.com
 
Húmor.is
Flokkur. Allt, bílar, Blabla, blog, boltinn, haha, Íslenskt, leikir, Minn Sirkus, myndir, video, webcam, wtf. Sýna +18 tengla Já/Nei ...
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Extreme Funny Humor
But, if we say you can learn to become extremely funny spontaneously in just 7 days? Check out the one and only course to develop your humor sense to beyond ...
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Rec.humor.funny jokes and comedy
Includes jokes posted to the newsgroup and updates 2-3 times a day.
www.netfunny.com
 
Philosophical humor
Philosophical humor. Compiled by David Chalmers. Some bits and pieces I've come across. Additions are always welcome. Lists and litanies ...
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SpikedHumor.com » Welcome to Spiked Entertainment ( Movies - Flash ...
Spikedhumor.com provides the best internet viral enterainment and comedy.
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Humour Links Comedy Sites Directory
Large searchable database of humor sites split into appropriate categories, and rated by users. Also features tools for webmasters to integrate the ...
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The Humor Archives - funny jokes, pictures, cartoons and movies
humor rss feed · Add to Google · Add to My Yahoo! Add to Bloglines · Add to Netvibes · Add to My AOL. Virtual Categories. Geeks · George W. Bush · Money ...
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Joe Monster.org - Probably The Best Page In The Universe
Humor ekskluzywny. Fotki filmiki * flashe * gierki * dowcipy * forum. Material czesto prowokacyjny. Politycznie niepoprawny. Pozostawia trwale slady w ...
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HumorON.com - You never want it to turn it off anymore!
Welcome to this humoron dot com website we provide you the most funniest, shocking & most amazing videos each day! so turn you let us turn your humor back ...
www.humoron.com
 
 

 

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  • 25 reasons you might need to wear a welding helmet

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  • 50 things to do to your boss that are fun for you but not for them

  • 5 reasons why you should quit your day job

  • 8 reasons why you should email me one dollar

  • amazing trivia part 1

  • anecdotes and the sharp wit of a teacher poet thinker

  • a lawyers favorite lawyer jokes

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  • brighten your day and enlighten your life

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  • by now i m a expert at memory loss

  • camping trip to and from hell part 2

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  • give your relationship a workout

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  • its awesome august again

  • its jest january

  • it s jest january

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  • laughter and health

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