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Humorous Software? It's Going To Bust Your Chops.
Do you think software is boring? Think again. Software companies have developed products that change your voice, make funny pictures and even predict your future. Curious? Read on.
AV Voice Changer (Avnex Ltd)
Browbeaten by bad chaps? Not allowed...
Similarity Breeds Comedy
My last piece I talked about associating or pairing up opposites
to produce funny ideas. Today we associate SIMILARITY or
CONGRUITY; by puting the same or similar objects, person or
animals together to engender laughter.
One fine example is...
The Lighter Side of Spam
Every morning when sit down at the ole computer and go to check my email I know two things will happen. (1) I won't have received any new sign-ups in any of the hundreds of affiliate programs that 'guaranteed' me a massive downline and (2) I will...
THINGS PERFECTLY NORMAL BEASTS DO
PUBLISHING GUIDELINES: Publishers wishing to use this article are invited to email the author a courtesy copy of their publication, for citation purposes. WORD COUNT: 566 It's amazing what "Perfectly Normal Beasts" will do in a pinch. Being a...
Very Precise Fortune Cookies
I cracked open the fortune cookie and read the little slip of paper on the inside. Immediately I realized that it had been written by a weather forecaster.
"You will be approached in the late afternoon by a pink polka-dot octopus..."
It...
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The Bare Truth About My Butt Quiz
Forget about the SAT, never mind the FCAT, and remove forever from you mind any thoughts about the ACT. All these test pale in comparision to the examination that I just failed. Failing those test may have minor repurcussions like never making it into college and therefore being forced to work at fast food resturants well into you 40's. That's nothing. I just flunked a quiz that could scar me for life.
This morning I was doing my usual morning ritual of checking my email and all my affiliate programs to see if I had made any money online yesterday. I hadn't, in fact I never do, but I've found it's a great way to waste an hour or two. What usually happens is I get sidetracked by some banner or pop-up and I end up lost in the middle of cyberspace signing up for a free registration to some weird website just so I can get a free ebook with a title like 'Online Profits From Artichoke Juice!". This morning, however, I stumbled across a real winner. I came across a link that I just had to click. I was at JokesUnlimited.com reading redneck jokes when I saw 'Fun Quizzes: Can you guess which butts are male or female?
From the extreme look of excitement in your eyes I can tell that you feel the same way I felt when I saw the Butt Quiz link. My first thought was: 'Pictures of female butts! Yeeeessss! And it's a quiz so I don't have to feel dirty about it. It's educational! Yeeeesssss! I immediately clicked the link and started my quiz.
In hindsight(no pun intended), the expression 'Fools Rush In' comes to mind. I blindly rushed into this quiz in a testosterone induced urge to look at female hindparts and I forgot to think the whole thing through. I forgot
to take a moment and reflect. I forgot that there were going to be male hindparts on the quiz too. Hairy male hindparts. In thongs.
Needless to say, I failed the quiz. I got 8 out of 15 right. That's about 60 percent. An 'F' in almost all 50 states. Even New Jersey. I, Tim Ward, humor columnist and straight male could not distinguish between the gluteus maximus of the male and female gender. I started to wonder: Were some of the butts that I said were female really male? If so, does that mean I find some men's butts attractive? Do I have a male butt fetsih that I didn't know about? Do I secretly enjoy slapping guys on the butt after a good sports play? And what about the woman's butts that I classified incorrectly? Has it really been that long since I've seen a bare female behind? Am I forgetting what the female body looks like?
All these questions have been running through my head since I failed my first Butt Quiz. It got to the point where I'm thinking about scheduling a retest. But this time I'll be sure to plenty of studying in advance. So ladies, if you see me taking large hard looks at your posterior region, I'm not a pervert, I'm just doing a little research. And to the fellas, forgive me if I give more that the usual amount of congratulatory butt slaps on the basketball court for awhile. I'm just trying to further my education...And maybe work through a fetish or two.
You can take the Butt Quiz for yourself at: http://www.jokesunlimited.com/buttquiz.php
About the Author
Timothy Ward invites you to subscribe to his weekly humor column 'I Never Said I Was Normal' at timward.1afm.com
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| Humor in the Yahoo! Directory |
| Find sites dedicated to all things funny, including jokes, comedy, quotes, and also humorous sites relating to animals, entertainment, and the bizarre. |
| dir.yahoo.com |
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| College Humor |
| Everything that's funny on the Internet is right here. Funny pictures, funny videos, and lots of boobies. |
| www.collegehumor.com |
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| Open Directory - Recreation: Humor |
| Arts: Comics (5279); Arts: Illustration: Cartoons (135); Arts: Performing Arts: Comedy (1506); News: Analysis and Opinion: Columnists: Humor (192) ... |
| dmoz.org |
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| Humour - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia |
| This article discusses humour in terms of comedy and laughter. ... Mintz, Lawrence E. Humor in America: A Research Guide to Genres and Topics. ... |
| en.wikipedia.org |
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| Humor Posters at AllPosters.com |
| Humor Posters at AllPosters.com. Choose from over 300000 posters and prints. Professional custom framing available. |
| www.allposters.com |
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| Humor: See what people are saying right now on Technorati |
| See all blog posts tagged with humor on Technorati. |
| www.technorati.com |
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| Political Humor - Jokes Satire and Political Cartoons |
| The Web's leading source for political humor, providing a witty and irreverent look at bizarre antics inside, outside and below the Beltway. |
| politicalhumor.about.com |
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| Psychology Humor |
| What's the surest sign that a subject isn't really a science? They're the ones whose proponents spend the most time trying to insist that their field is a ... |
| www.psych.upenn.edu |
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| Pages tagged with "humor" on del.icio.us |
| All items tagged humor ??? view popular ... Reason Magazine - All I Think Is That It's Stupid · save this. by karindalziel to humor ... 54 mins ago ... |
| del.icio.us |
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| About Humor - Comedy - Jokes - Cartoons - New Funny Sites - Humor ... |
| New sick jokes every weekday plus new links each week to the best in humor and sickness on the Net. From About.com. |
| humor.about.com |
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| Funny and Humorous T-Shirts and Gifts at CafePress.com : Shop Over ... |
| Funny T-shirts and Gifts. Humor Gifts. Share a laugh with funny t-shirts, stickers and more! See all results... Categories within Funny T-shirts and Gifts ... |
| www.cafepress.com |
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| Húmor.is |
| Flokkur. Allt, bílar, Blabla, blog, boltinn, haha, Íslenskt, leikir, Minn Sirkus, myndir, video, webcam, wtf. Sýna +18 tengla Já/Nei ... |
| www.humor.is |
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| Extreme Funny Humor |
| But, if we say you can learn to become extremely funny spontaneously in just 7 days? Check out the one and only course to develop your humor sense to beyond ... |
| www.extremefunnyhumor.com |
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| Rec.humor.funny jokes and comedy |
| Includes jokes posted to the newsgroup and updates 2-3 times a day. |
| www.netfunny.com |
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| Philosophical humor |
| Philosophical humor. Compiled by David Chalmers. Some bits and pieces I've come across. Additions are always welcome. Lists and litanies ... |
| consc.net |
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| SpikedHumor.com » Welcome to Spiked Entertainment ( Movies - Flash ... |
| Spikedhumor.com provides the best internet viral enterainment and comedy. |
| www.spikedhumor.com |
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| Humour Links Comedy Sites Directory |
| Large searchable database of humor sites split into appropriate categories, and rated by users. Also features tools for webmasters to integrate the ... |
| www.humorlinks.com |
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| The Humor Archives - funny jokes, pictures, cartoons and movies |
| humor rss feed · Add to Google · Add to My Yahoo! Add to Bloglines · Add to Netvibes · Add to My AOL. Virtual Categories. Geeks · George W. Bush · Money ... |
| www.thehumorarchives.com |
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| Joe Monster.org - Probably The Best Page In The Universe |
| Humor ekskluzywny. Fotki filmiki * flashe * gierki * dowcipy * forum. Material czesto prowokacyjny. Politycznie niepoprawny. Pozostawia trwale slady w ... |
| joemonster.org |
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| HumorON.com - You never want it to turn it off anymore! |
| Welcome to this humoron dot com website we provide you the most funniest, shocking & most amazing videos each day! so turn you let us turn your humor back ... |
| www.humoron.com |
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