Search
Related Links

 

 

Informative Articles

Birthstones and their meanings
A gift that incorporates birthstones is a thoughtful one for a mother or grandmother, especially when a new baby has come into the family. And of course, they make great birthday presents! January Traditional Gem(s): Garnet, Rose Quartz Modern...

Creating A Prenuptial Agreement
Embarking upon a marriage is a wonderful time in life - emotions are running high and you have great optimism about the future you will build together. The last thing you want to do is jeopardize your love by discussing mundane things like who...

Finding Your Feng Shui Power Spots for Love and Romance
The first step in using feng shui to attract a partner or improve your love life is to find the relationship power spots in your home. Once you have located these areas, feng shui cures and enhancements can activate these areas and increase your...

Forbidden - An Author Interview
Forbidden – Author Interview with Wilma Wall By Lisa M. Hendey A war is on between two bitter and powerful enemy nations. A brave young man, persecuted at times because of his ethnicity, steps forward to defend his new homeland. A young woman finds...

Marriage Saving Advice: Have A Soul Connection With Your Spouse Even If All Seems Lost
Many of us realize that marriage is not the easiest relationship in the world, but why is it so hard? Unless we adopt children, the only relatives that we get to choose are our spouses. Seems like it should work out, right? We can not change our...

 
Reasons You Aren't Starting the Decision Making Process About Whether To Get a Divorce Or Stay Married

Along with any tough decision comes reluctance, especially when that decision involves an actual process and might potentially involve emotional pain or anguish. Deciding whether or not to get a divorce or stay married can be a frightening time for most people, even if they know deep inside themselves that they have to actually make a decision, one way or another.

People are reluctant to embark on an 'emotionally driven' decision making process because they fear that it will be uncomfortable or painful for them. The irony here is obvious...if they need to make this decision, their life or a portion if it, is already uncomfortable. One thing is for certain, deciding whether to get a divorce or stay married is indeed a process.

This process, like any other, includes key elements…elements that need to be examined. The elements of this process are self-revealing and can only come from within the person making the decision. The decision making process is comprised of stages and viewpoints about those stages. Stages are smaller pieces of the overall process and the viewpoints of each of those stages are only defined by the person making the decision. If you're trying to decide whether or not you should get a divorce or stay married, you must look at the stage of life you are currently in, and understand how you feel about it by clearly defining your viewpoint about it.

Are you completely unhappy?

Relatively unhappy?

Partially unhappy?

Do you feel that your marriage is unhealthy enough that you intend to do something about it?

Etc.

You can look back in the past and reflect on other stages of your life and examine how you felt about those stages if they contributed to your problem as you view it now. Reflecting on the past can be an effective way to identify key occurrences that may have shaped the way your viewpoint is currently. Reflecting also can help you to identify trends in behavior that may have contributed to your viewpoint. But in the end, the viewpoint and stage that matters most is the current one and that's the one that you need to define and assess most.

It is human tendency to reflect on the past and hold onto thoughts and feelings that were once good, but doing this might keep you in a stale mate if you dwell on the past too much. You have to look at the present time and actually "decide to decide" so to speak. Once you do realize that you need to decide whether or not to get a divorce, there will be things that will creep up that will actually keep you from


taking action and deciding.

Here are 5 reasons you might not be deciding to take action when it comes to deciding whether you should get a divorce or stay married:

1. You know that the severity of divorce is something not to be taken lightly so you avoid that "potential" outcome by doing nothing.

I assure you, if you realize that divorce is serious, you're ahead of the game because it means that you will do what it takes to change your situation!

2. You haven't decided to take action because you think you actually do want a divorce, and you think that divorce can create emotional scars that take a long time to heal.

3. You know that, whatever the outcome, you're really not ready to face a potentially painful end result, so you avoid the situation all together.

4. You are just flat out scared to make a decision about divorce because you know that making this difficult decision will involve profound change and deep "self-examination". And, like most of us, you want to avoid the pain and discomfort that goes with that.

5. You just don't know where to start because you are confused due to the emotional complexities of the situation. You really don't know how you feel.

All are these are valid points, but they are really just excuses to do nothing.

And, if you do nothing, the problem will still remain. And that problem is "indecision".

You haven't committed to decide. If any of these things are keeping you from making a decision about whether to stay married, you're doing more harm to yourself than good. In fact, by doing nothing, you are only compounding your problem. You are contributing to your own unhappiness by not taking action and that is just flat out unhealthy!

The first stage to going through the process of deciding whether or not to get a divorce, is to overcome your fear of the potential outcome and embrace this 'emotionally driven' process. Defining your fears and identifying why you aren't making the decision, or at least starting the decision making process about getting a divorce or staying married, is the only way you will be able to reach your ultimate goal…making a final decision to either get divorced or try to work it out.

Karl Augustine Author, "A Practical Guide To Deciding Whether Or Not To Get A Divorce". *A resource recommended by marriage counselors to their clients.


http://www.deciding-on-divorce.com/reasons-decide-divorce.htm


 

Marriage - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Marriages are generally publicly declared in the context of a wedding ceremony. ... The term wedlock is a synonym for marriage, and is mainly used in the ...
en.wikipedia.org
 
Marriage Builders ® - Successful Marriage Advice
Provides answers and insight to questions about infidelity, marriage counseling, and divorce. A free support forum is also available.
www.marriagebuilders.com
 
Christian Marriages - Families Christianity Free Newsletters Sex ...
A biweekly newsletter, published by Christianity Today, that provides information and articles of interest for couples.
www.christianitytoday.com
 
Marriage -- THE starting place for exploring marriage
Useful links, and weekly feature articles on making your marriage the best it can be. Chat room and bulletin board also onsite. From About.com.
marriage.about.com
 
Marriage - Wex
Today the underlying concept that marriage is a legal contract still remains ... Entering into a marriage changes the legal status of both parties and gives ...
www.law.cornell.edu
 
Smart Marriages
Clearinghouse: The latest EASY-TO-USE information to make your marriage or realtionship successful, sexy, and satisfying.
www.smartmarriages.com
 
University of the Family - Marriage Ministries International
Marriage is the foundation of the family. When the relationship is hurting, the family is hurting. Couples seek counseling and counseling and are often ...
www.marriage.org
 
USC-MSA Compendium of Muslim Texts
Marriage in Islam has aspects of both 'ibadah (worship) of Allah and mu'amalah ... The Prophet considered marriage for a Muslim as half of his religion ...
www.usc.edu
 
Marriage Records - First Comes Love - Portland, Oregon
Tonight (Wed Nov 29) Marriage’s own old intern Cole Miller and Glacier Park’s Jessie Slavich are playing at Valentine’s (232 SW Ankeny) downtown at 8pm. ...
www.marriagerecs.com
 
National Marriage Project Home Page
Research, education, training and advocacy to strengthen the institution of marriage.
marriage.rutgers.edu
 
UKBMD - Births, Marriages, Deaths Indexes & Census transcriptions ...
UK BMD Births, Marriages and Deaths Indexes Online. Baptims, Burials, Monumental Inscriptions, Cemetry, Cemetries, Civil Registration, GRO Indexes, BMD, ...
www.ukbmd.org.uk
 
Welcome to Worldwide Marriage Encounter Home Page
Marriage Encounter weekends give married couples the tools to make Good marriages GREAT marriages! Why settle for a ho-hum relationship when you can have a ...
www.wwme.org
 
Alternatives to Marriage Project
Provides support and information to people who choose not to marry, are unable to marry, or are making decisions about marriage.
www.unmarried.org
 
Marriage Equality USA (index.shtml)
Group solely committed to securing the right to civil marriage for same-sex couples. Related facts, membership information, and chapters.
www.marriageequality.org
 
President Calls for Constitutional Amendment Protecting Marriage
President Bush on Tuesday said, "The amendment should fully protect marriage, while leaving the state legislatures free to make their own choices in ...
www.whitehouse.gov
 
Marriage in Ancient Rome
Selected information plus a bibliography and internet links.
www.fortunecity.com
 
Instructions to Obtain a Marriage Certificate Copy
This page provides instructions for obtaining a certified or uncertified copy of a Wisconsin marriage certificate.
www.dhfs.state.wi.us
 
Judaism 101: Marriage
Learn about the Jewish concept of finding your soul mate, Jewish weddings, the process of acquiring a spouse, and the marital relationship.
www.jewfaq.org
 
the marriage toolbox
www.marriagetools.com/ - Similar pages
 
American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy
Professionally developed resources for practitioners and consumers of marriage and family therapy. Site also offers a search engine for finding a qualified ...
www.aamft.org
 
 

 

Content Menu
  • 100 ways to connect with your teen

  • 10 crucial and surprising steps to build trust in a relationship

  • 10 steps to success in love and marriage

  • 3 little mistakes that could cost you your marriage

  • 5 things you shouldnt do if hes cheating on you

  • 5 ways to ensure you will have a happy life after divorce

  • 6 common marriage mistakes

  • 7 secrets of a happy marriage

  • adultery as sexual addiction should you stay married

  • aladdin wedding chapel of las vegas marriage mediterranean style

  • all about love

  • american women really dont like you

  • are your children growing up too fast

  • are you making time for your marriage

  • are you truly thankful for everything

  • author interview mommy come home

  • a call for international marriage laws

  • a lasting marriage some useful tips

  • a look at christian dating services

  • a look at jewish dating traditions

  • a look at men women and marriage can it work

  • a new school year

  • a practical guide to a better marriage

  • a promise ring more than just a pre engagement ring

  • a womans job no woman wants

  • better aging

  • beyond the arch of swords making military marriage last

  • be a good role model

  • be thankful for a faithful husband

  • birthstones and their meanings

  • breaking the cycle of emotional blackmail

  • bringing debts into a marriage

  • budget the luxuries first

  • building hedges around your marriage

  • business partners and marital partners will the marriage survive part i

  • business partners and marital partners will the marriage survive part ii

  • business partners marital partners will the marriage survive part i

  • business partners marital partners will the marriage survive part ii

  • can this relationship be helped

  • cat associations and cat lovers of world

  • cat lovers and cat associations around the world

  • cheating spouse is spying an invasion of privacy

  • childrens discipline how to resolve divorce parenting differences

  • children and remarriage

  • children are people not machines

  • chinese marriage

  • choosing an international marriage agency mail order bride service

  • choosing the right music for your wedding

  • christian marriage today

  • christmas gifts can be a cheating husbands undoing

  • comparison of medieval and renaissance marriage customs

  • confessions of a retread wife

  • considering success in marriage

  • contested and uncontested divorce

  • creating a family tree

  • creating a prenuptial agreement

  • creating false expectations for clients

  • daisies a story about life

  • dating after divorce things to think about regarding dating after divorce

  • dating women from russia important tips the marriage agencies never tell you

  • dating your spouse planning an evening on the town no kids

  • deciding on divorce how to know you are making the right choice

  • decorating a sexy bedroom

  • diaper bags for dads papas got a brand new bag

  • direct tv satellite saving marriages saving programs

  • discovering infidelity one womans story

  • discover the shocking truth about russian women

  • dish network and directv featuring marriage saving capabilities

  • dish network directv featuring marriage saving capabilities

  • divorce advice getting divorce advice from the right source

  • divorce and children things to consider when youre staying married only for your children

  • divorce articles how to get the most from a divorce article

  • divorce decision things to consider when making a decision about divorce

  • divorce reasons what constitutes a viable reason for thinking about or wanting a divorce

  • does 50 50 chore splitting an equal marriage make

  • does living in a loveless marriage necessarily mean that you should get a divorce

  • does marriage counseling work

  • does your sexless marriage have you thinking about divorce

  • dont ignore the signs how emotional infidelity can ruin your marriage

  • dont let a home business cost you your family

  • dormmates lving with others can be tough

  • do you like her

  • do you make these 3 common mistakes in your marriage

  • elderlife matters for caregivers and employers

  • emotional infidelity a key tactic to save the marriage

  • eva

  • everything i know about relationship success i learned at the playground

  • every mom worries

  • extramarital affairs what everyone needs to know and what you can do to help

  • extramarital affairs when sexual addiction and infidelity meet

  • extramarital affair should you get a divorce just because one of you had an extramarital affair

  • extreme age differences in marriage can lead to infidelity

  • e book on russian women part 1

  • e book on russian women part 10

  • e book on russian women part 2

  • e book on russian women part 3

  • e book on russian women part 4

  • e book on russian women part 5

  • e book on russian women part 6

  • e book on russian women part 7

  • e book on russian women part 8

  • e book on russian women part 9

  • facing the homeschool super mom

  • family law

  • fear of engulfment

  • feng shui tips for the bathroom

  • finances and marriage

  • finding your feng shui power spots for love and romance

  • five effective ways of saving marriage

  • five types of marriages which group are you in

  • forbidden an author interview

  • for men the 2 hidden secrets of the worlds greatest marriage philosophy

  • fun dating ideas to spice up your marriage

  • gay marriage rights

  • gemstone rings history and information

  • getting more from dating romantic relationships and marriage

  • get a prenuptial agreement before your next marriage

  • gifts for men anniversary gifts

  • gift baskets create simple easy gifts for the person who has everything

  • give and take recipe for success in marriage

  • god can heal your marriage

  • great gifts under 5

  • guilt free parenting

  • happy marriage secrets

  • helping your family survive a home makeover

  • help my husbands buddies are butting into my marriage

  • help my preteen teenager is driving me nuts

  • help your marriage survive the rough spots

  • heres help for the i cant say no blues

  • he still hasnt popped the question should you give him an ultimatum

  • hidden divorce costs

  • holy mantrimony

  • home improvement for ladies

  • how a new discovery can make a luke warm marriage hot

  • how clutter affects your love life

  • how i improved my marriage ten fold in one evening

  • how optimism can help or hurt your marriage

  • how the challenge of single parenting affects your decision to divorce

  • how to choose a dating service

  • how to choose a marriage counselor

  • how to choose a pearl necklace for your wedding day

  • how to choose the right marriage counselor

  • how to deal with sibling rivalry

  • how to decide whether to keep your marriage or other relationship going or to end it

  • how to fight cultural differences in marriage and stay happy

  • how to have a successful marriage

  • how to have the perfect christmas

  • how to identify what the question should i get a divorce means to you

  • how to keep love alive in your marriage

  • how to keep your marriage life sexy and thrilled

  • how to make a time capsule

  • how to make a time capsule for your new baby

  • how to plan your wedding and honeymoon

  • how to prepare for marriage

  • how to reviving romance in marriage

  • how to save your marriage

  • how to structure your marriage

  • how we found a marriage counselor

  • hunter and gatherer

  • if i hurt you then im sorry

  • imagine the perfect marriage

  • im no marriage counsellor but i have been a bestman

  • index

  • infidelity advice how gifts can expose your cheating husband

  • infidelity difference between a rage and revenge affair

  • infidelity excuse i fell out of love and just love being in love

  • infidelity how my marriage made me do it is a cop out

  • influence of astrology in indian marriages

  • interactive electronic childrens books

  • interview with author of gods blueprint for a healed restored marriage

  • intimacy in marriage what is it really and how can you have it

  • is conflict healthy in marriage

  • is it a good idea to room with a friend

  • is she cheating many unsuspecting husbands find out too late

  • is this the one

  • is your marriage problem severe enough to warrant getting a divorce

  • is your marriage strong enough for the swinging lifestyle

  • it pays for single christians to date other like minded people

  • joy

  • june weddings

  • k1 visas in russia

  • keeping a marriage happy

  • keeping a marriage romantic

  • keeping love alive

  • labeling is disabling achieving congruent communication

  • lessons about marriage learnt from riding a bike

  • let your wedding flowers speak the language of love

  • life insurance the universe and everything

  • living in love remembering why you married

  • living together without marriage improves mens mental health

  • loveless marriage does living in a loveless marriage necessarily mean that you should get a divorce

  • love and marriage fairy tale

  • love marriage and money

  • love marriage and romance

  • make time for your relationship

  • man shortage again

  • marking togetherness beyond the unity candle

  • marriage

  • marriages may end but families are forever

  • marriage and sexual relation

  • marriage and the election

  • marriage children and divorce when le music stops

  • marriage divorce and kids

  • marriage divorce separation how to handle the split loyalties after separation

  • marriage dreams when fails

  • marriage finances 101

  • marriage in the virgin islands st thomas weddings

  • marriage is a long conversation

  • marriage licenses las vegas style

  • marriage miscommunication root cause of problems

  • marriage missing its spark

  • marriage or divorce check your social security number

  • marriage problem is your marriage problem severe enough to warrant getting a divorce

  • marriage proposals why doing it right will make all the difference

  • marriage saving advice have a soul connection with your spouse even if all seems lost

  • marriage seperation a practical guide

  • marriage what happened to the fairy tale

  • maybe this christmas will be different

  • meeting your russian lady for the first time

  • mindfulness and marriage moving along

  • money and marriage 101

  • moral armors irrational parenting part i

  • more than mom and dad

  • mrs disney

  • multi gemstone rings why wear rings with many gemstones

  • mutants or clones

  • oneness in marriage part 1

  • one mans perspective of love and creating work balance

  • online dating 101 the basics

  • overcome adultery ways to make your marriage whole again

  • planning a special wedding shower

  • prenuptial agreements

  • prenuptial agreements should they be a prerequisite to marriage

  • putting romance back into your marriage

  • raising emotionally intelligent sons

  • real friends

  • reasons for divorce what constitutes viable reasons for thinking about or wanting a divorce

  • reasons you arent starting the decision making process about whether to get a divorce or stay married

  • rediscovering love and intimacy

  • relationships too easy to leave

  • renees mommy is here

  • replacing your lost wedding ring

  • right hand bling rings the ultimate new accessory for the savvy single woman

  • right hand diamond ring

  • romance in marriage begins in the mind

  • rotator

  • royal family trees

  • satellite tv by dish network deals a blow to unhappy marriages

  • saving marriage

  • second marriage wedding dress and etiquette

  • secrets of successful marriage

  • secret of a happy marriage

  • seeing a marriage counselor is not admitting defeat its admitting there is hope

  • semper fidelis

  • seven marriage spice ups

  • seven valentines day tips for spouses in less than perfect marriages

  • sexless marriage does your sexless marriage have you thinking about divorce

  • should you forgive infidelity

  • signs of a respectable russian marriage agency

  • signs of infidelity my marriage made me do it

  • single in a couples world

  • single parenting how the challenge of single parenting affects your decision to divorce

  • single women are hot

  • speak to me of love

  • spice up that lifeless marriage

  • stop divorce should you try to stop your divorce if youre just thinking about getting a divorce

  • straight forward advice on marriage that works

  • struggling with addictions

  • successful dating and marriage 1

  • successful dating and marriage 2

  • successful dating and marriage 3

  • surviving divorce what to think about to ensure surviving divorce

  • take back your time day is coming

  • taking an interest in your marriage

  • taking the true relationship test

  • ten financial tips for women

  • ten suggestions for the overscheduled child

  • theres more to wedding invitations than you might think

  • the abcs of marriage

  • the abortion debate

  • the american bride wore red

  • the basics of marriage counseling

  • the bigger the carat the better the wedding

  • the crimes we commit against our marriages

  • the dangers of a me first marriage

  • the essence of infidelity

  • the family cycle i euphoric and dysphoric cycles in marriage

  • the fundamentals of a great marriage

  • the guide to changing your name after marriage

  • the history of valentines day

  • the legal fiction of common law marriage

  • the marriage test

  • the most important things in marriage

  • the new marriage part four of four

  • the new marriage part one of four

  • the new marriage part three of four

  • the new marriage part two of four

  • the only new years resolution you need

  • the origin and history of valentines day

  • the revenge affair characteristics of the adulterer

  • the secret of success in courtship and marriage sex and happiness part 3

  • the secret to success in courtship and marriage sex and happiness part 1

  • the secret to success in courtship and marriage sex and happiness part 2

  • the secret to success in courtship and marriage sex and happiness part 3

  • the secret to success in courtship and marriage sex and happiness part 4

  • the secret to success in courtship and marriage sex and happiness part 5

  • the spirit of fathers day

  • the surge of the urge

  • the talking stick a mans promise to give undivided attention

  • the top 10 ways to take the fear out of retirement

  • this world is being ran by a penis and vagina

  • tips for a happy marriage

  • tips for a lasting marriage

  • tips to spice up your marriage

  • too many divorces

  • to love forever

  • traditional anniversary gifts year by year for one hundred years

  • traditional bridal shower gifts

  • true love part 1

  • trust in marriage

  • two hearts are now one

  • types of russian marriage agencies

  • uncontested divorce how thinking about an uncontested divorce figures into your decision about divorce

  • valentines day

  • valentines day where did that come from

  • wedding destination tips from two gurus

  • wedding gifts for second marriages

  • wedding rings through the ages and for all eternity

  • wedding ring sets for men and women

  • whats involved in marriage counseling

  • whats in a kiss

  • what clutter clearing can do for you

  • what destroys a marriage

  • what does the bible say about interracial marriages

  • what is homeschooling and how do i know if its right for my family

  • what is normal sexuality in marriage

  • what women want

  • where do you cast

  • which came first love or marriage

  • whos your daddy how to be a great dad in 5 to 7 minutes

  • why arent you using this marriage saving tip

  • why men wont commit to marriage

  • why moms should start a home based business today

  • why some marriages explode and fall into ashes

  • why so much infidelity

  • women and divorce how women should protect themselves financially regarding divorce

  • youre a mom shes a mom being an adult with your parents

  • your mission field at work

  • you can laugh at marriage worries if you follow this simple 3 step plan