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MORAL ARMOR'S Irrational Parenting, Part IV
The Author of Moral Armor reveals the psychology of bad parenting; from why they have children to the ultimate parenting sin: raising aimless, fear-ridden, defenseless individuals.
Imposing Their Future. In contradiction...
More Than I Can Bear
One of my long time best friends called me the other night with a horrible pain in her heart. She needed someone to talk to. Rumor had it her daughter might be suicidal and she was trapped on a business trip until the next evening. Her...
PARENTING DILEMMAS: FINDING SUPPORT ONLINE
The role of being a parent is full of trials and tribulations. The good times are great, but the bad times can make you feel frustrated and lonely.
Friendly advice: to take it or not?
Confiding in friends and family about problems at home is...
Responsible Fatherhood - A Unique And Irreplaceable Role!
Something happened the other day that made me feel uneasy.
Yet I shouldn't have felt that way!
My wife had left for work and I was hanging the washing out
to dry. A neighbour from down the way was in his backyard
doing the same. 'Good...
The Parent Teen Relationship
It was the homework that did it. Each night became a challenge in how I was going to get my son, a non-academic, to do his homework. I tried patience, encouragement, and teaching, all to no avail. I moved on to bribery, threats and punishment,...
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Mommy & Baby: Styles Of Parenting
As a parent, you have the opportunity to set the tone in your home based on the style of parenting you choose. You can choose child-centered parenting or family-centered parenting--the differences will be discussed here.
Child-centered Parenting
o Intensely pursue the child's happiness, taking great strains to avoid discomfort or emotional stress for the child.
o The child receives what she wants when she wants it: no delay, no waiting.
These concepts might not sound too bad, but what happens when Mom is sick? Or when Mom & Dad want to leave the baby with a sitter? There is little-to-no freedom in this parenting plan--and the baby will not grow in to a child who understands delayed gratification or how the world works. Additionally, this sets a child up for a bad case of "me-ism"--other people will not matter to her. Her goals and needs are paramount to everyone else's goals and needs, and the ability to look outward and understand being part of a team will be compromised.
Family-centered Parenting
o Keeps the baby's needs met, but within the appropriate context of the family unit.
o The child enters in to a team-setting; she is not the center of the universe, but part of the family-team.
These concepts might not seem very different from the child-centered approach to parenting, but the results of the two methods are starkly
different. Parents have the freedom to meet their child's needs and look ahead to developing skills and abilities, as they aren't catering to every fleeting whim or fancy a child might express. Sitters are okay for the family, as the parents will take time out to "date" and be intentional with each other. Because a baby raised in a family-centered plan understands that she is part of a team, she will learn "we-ism," not "me-ism." She will consider others as she grows and how her goals and needs can be met within the framework of a team--without compromising the others on the team.
You may know people on either side of these parenting styles who go overboard. That's not what I'm advocating here; a balance must be achieved. Remember these things:
Life doesn't stop because you have a baby
Date your spouse
Continue those loving gestures you enjoyed before your baby came along
Invite some friends over for food and fellowship
At the end of each day, spend 15 minutes sitting with your spouse, discussing the day's events About the Author
Kirsten Hawkins is a baby and parenting expert specializing new mothers and single parent issues. Visit http://www.babyhelp411.com/ for more information on how to raising healthy, happy children.
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