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Essential Tips for the Kitchen
Cupboards and drawers should contain items that are grouped together. Store items where you use them. Put your plates near the table, knives near island or cutting counter, glasses near the fridge, and coffee items near the coffee machine. Clean...
Getting Great Pictures of the Kids this Halloween
There she was in all her glory. Long white lab coat, frizzy hair, safety goggles -- and a face smeared with the black ash of an experiment gone terrifically wrong. She was, at least on this Halloween night, Dr. Abby Normal. But for most of her...
The Last Day of 'Who Cares?'
Yesterday was the last day of ‘Who Cares?’ for my oldest child. Today is his first day of high school. From now on, his choices will have a long-term effect on his life. Nothing will ever be the same for him.
Our culture doesn’t make a big...
The Spirit of Father's Day
Some time ago I received a gift from both of my children. It was spontaneous and had nothing to do with Father’s day. Yet, at the same time it had everything to do with Father’s day.
My son, Kai, - he was 17 at the time - was attending a...
What the Matter Is
When my oldest boy was really young, he tickled my mother with that phrase. I would ask him, "What's the matter?" and he would answer me, "Well, what the matter is..." followed by whatever it was that he needed to discuss with me. He would say...
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Parenting Advice: When Your Kids Fight
Researchers tell us that 36 million acts of sibling rivalry occur every year. Some are severe. Most are normal. When your kids fight, they want you in the middle. They want you to be the judge and jury. They each want you to take their side. I remember my own mother's reaction.
When I was a kid, my brother, Art, and I fought constantly. We kicked, we teased, we shoved, we called each other names, and we rolled over and over on the ground punching each other as hard as we could. My mother said, "I was sure you two would kill each other."
Many fights started in our backyard. In my excitement to win the fights, my yelling grew so loud that the whole neighborhood knew we were slugging it out again. My, mother, a rather shy person, would throw up a back room window and yell, "For God's sake Jeanie, shut up!" The whole neighborhood heard her too. Her shouts embarrassed me and hurt my feelings but they didn't stop me. My brother and I fought like that almost every day. And almost everyday mom would shout the same command.
Looking back, I can't remember what Art and I fought about. I can remember my mother's words. How about you?
When your kids fight, and you step in the middle,
what will your kids remember?
Your yelling?
Your swearing?
Your hitting?
Your lecturing?
Your
letting them duke it out?
Knowing what to do in the heat of the moment isn't easy. What is easy, is letting your own anger explode. If you do, what are you really teaching your kids?
Parenting Tips and Advice:
Talk the situation over with your partner or someone you trust.
Come up with a logical plan for handling future fights.
Tell your kids (when they're not fighting) what will happen the next time they fight.
Determine to respond with your reason and not your emotion.
Follow through with the plan.
If you react to your kid's fighting the way my mother did, you can change.
Ask yourself these three questions:
What will my kids remember about my reactions?
What am I really teaching them?
What do I want to teach them?
Here's to your parenting success!
About the Author
Jean Tracy, MSS, Edmonds, WA,
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Read informative articles written by seasoned counselors with tips and tools you must use to raise your awesome kids with solid characters.
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click on Books and Products to check out the "Problem Solver Kit" for solving sibling rivalry when you subscribe at: http://www.KidsDiscuss.com
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