|
|
|
Back to School; Time to Recharge
The back-to-school shopping is done. Brand new pencils, colored markers, and notebooks fill my daughter�s back pack. I�ve cleaned off the refrigerator in preparation for the new onslaught of pictures and class notices. School�s started. She...
In Search Of Elmo
My son is a wonderful boy, an imaginative, active four year old with a set of rules for life all his own. The rules that keep his four year old views in his perspective, the rules to life that make him, his own person.
One of his �rules� is...
Is It Okay to Spoil Your Kids?
The following article is offered for free use in your ezine, print publication or on your web site, so long as the author resource box at the end is included. Notification of publication would be appreciated. Title: Is It Okay to Spoil Your Kids?...
Kids: Channeling Mania Towards Productivity
More and more kids these days are diagnosed ADD, ADHD, or Bipolar. There are biological reasons for this, and there are environmental elements which can soothe or aggravate the symptoms. It becomes increasingly easy to �react� to each...
Mommy & Baby: Styles Of Parenting
As a parent, you have the opportunity to set the tone in your home based on the style of parenting you choose. You can choose child-centered parenting or family-centered parenting--the differences will be discussed here.
Child-centered...
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
The Parent Teen Relationship
It was the homework that did it. Each night became a challenge in how I was going to get my son, a non-academic, to do his homework. I tried patience, encouragement, and teaching, all to no avail. I moved on to bribery, threats and punishment, still no success. Finally I tried anger, frustration and tears, but still no joy. At the end of my tether I knew it was time for a change.
Looking back on my behaviour I could see how I had changed from a calm, encouraging parent into a demanding, controlling tyrant. This was a true wake up call; I could not believe I had turned into the very thing I hated to see in others. I asked myself, "what is more important, homework or the relationship with my son?"
The parenting relationship is a tricky one; one that needs to continue to evolve over time. It is made doubly tricky by the fact that the child uses this relationship as a role model for future relationships. As a child they see that adults have the control and power in a relationship; as they grow into adolescents they want this control and power for themselves. No wonder there are so many battles between parents and teens.
However, the desire for control and power is also reflected between the teenagers themselves. Mixed with the self-centeredness left over from childhood and the need to belong, a potent mix is created; otherwise known as peer pressure. This pressure can take many forms, from daring someone to do something that you haven't got the courage to do, to manipulating someone to give you what you want. Standing up to this pressure, particularly from their close friends can be difficult,
Teenagers need to learn how to get their needs met but without resorting to using control, power or manipulation. Just as importantly they need to learn how to resist pressure from others. If parents can change the relationship they have with
their teen so that each other's needs are dealt with using respect, understanding and appreciation, then teens can experiment and realise the benefits of such a relationship.
Fortunately, the tools required for such a relationship can be easily taught, although putting them into practice will take a little more effort. Just telling teens what to do rarely works so parents will need to initiate the change and use the tools with their teen.
Once your relationship has changed with your teen, you will both be in a better position to tackle the other relationships in your teen�s life.
How to Improve Your Relationship With Your Teen
- Listen to their point of view. Put yourself in their shoes and see the world through their eyes. Ask them how it makes them feel.
- Understand what makes them tick. Look for the differences between you and them and then learn more about them.
- Accept them for who they are. Differentiate between them as a person and their behaviour. Ask for behaviour to change but accept them as they are.
- Acknowledge their presence. Look for what they do that�s positive and verbalise your appreciation. Appreciate what they don�t do as well as what they do.
- Give them space. Teens need privacy, not just in their bedrooms but also in their thoughts. Avoid interrogation techniques and opt for genuine interest.
About the Author
Carol Shepley has been involved with teenagers for over 10 years and, as the parent of a teen herself, fully understands the pressures placed on parents and teens today. She now shares this knowledge and experience through her website http://www.growingupmatters.com so that parents can help their teens become resilient, resourceful and responsible adults.
|
|
|
|
|
| Pregnancy | Baby | Child | Mom | Advice Tips & Resources for ... |
| Parenting magazine has everything you need to raise a happy, healthy family. Get expert advice on child development, the best in baby names, our pregnancy ... |
| www.parenting.com |
|
| Pregnancy & Parenting: For Today's Mom - iVillage |
| From trying to conceive through your child's teen years, iVillage Pregnancy & Parenting offers up-to-date and informative articles, features, expert advice ... |
| parenting.ivillage.com |
|
| Parenting.org � Help and guidance for parents! |
| Answers questions about parenting and has resources for better parenting. |
| www.parenting.org |
|
| Parents |
| Expert advice about pregnancy, your kids, your life, and family time from the editors of Parents magazine. |
| www.parents.com |
|
| BBC - Parenting |
| Practical solutions to help with the challenges of everyday parenting - including expert advice as well as tips from other mums and dads. |
| www.bbc.co.uk |
|
| Parenting, Pregnancy,Conception, Babynames - Parenthood.com |
| Information regarding parenthood and parenting. Find the meanings of Baby names and useful articles on parenting. |
| www.parenthood.com |
|
| Parenting advice, child development and family reference at ... |
| FamilyEducation.com provides parents with educational printables, games, activities, parenting ideas, tips, family advice, and information on learning ... |
| www.familyeducation.com |
|
| MedlinePlus: Parenting |
| From the National Institutes of Health; Adventures in Parenting (National Institute of Child Health and Human Development) ... |
| www.nlm.nih.gov |
|
| The National Parenting Center |
| Support site for parenting. Dedicated to providing parents with comprehensive and responsible guidance from the world's most renowned child-rearing ... |
| www.tnpc.com |
|
| About - Parenting & Family |
| Parenting advice from moms and dads who know what's up. Whether your babies are still actual infants, or about to enter college, our Guides will give you ... |
| about.com |
|
| Positive Parenting - Main Menu |
| Debbie Critzer Positive Parenting is dedicated to providing resources and info rmation ... Welcome to Positive Parenting online! For our long-time readers, ... |
| www.positiveparenting.com |
|
| Parenting Tips and Information on Baby Care and Pregnancy. |
| This parenting and baby care resource center offers essential pregnancy, baby care and development information, tips, and articles. |
| www.parenttime.com |
|
| Parenting, Children's Health and Education, Family Crafts and ... |
| Parenting, Children, and Families - ParentCenter is the most trusted online resource for parents of young kids. ParentCenter offers free weekly newsletters, ... |
| parentcenter.babycenter.com |
|
| Parenting - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia |
| The term "child training" implies a specific type of parenting that focuses on ... Parenting measures can also be observational, such as the Parent-Child ... |
| en.wikipedia.org |
|
| Today's Parent |
| At Todaysparent.com you'll find a parenting community to call your own, with a library of information on all the ages and stages of your growing family, ... |
| www.todaysparent.com |
|
| Indian Parenting - The Definitive Guide |
| Comprehensive website for Indian parents with topics ranging from pregnancy to raising children, including articles on infertility, health and medicine, ... |
| www.indiaparenting.com |
|
| Exceptional Parent Magazine - Eparent.com - parenting those with ... |
| Magazine for parents of children or young adults with disabilities. Includes reports, forum, products links, books. |
| www.eparent.com |
|
| Parenting: information, advice and support from toddler to teenage |
| Parenting advice, information and support to help you with your family, from toddler to teens. |
| www.ivillage.co.uk |
|
| Parenting-QA.com - Parenting Questions and Answers For Parents in ... |
| All parents have questions about their children�s behavior, growth, and development. The challenges of parenting seem never-ending and constantly evolving. |
| www.parenting-qa.com |
|
| Parenting Teens - Troubled Teen Help Information. |
| Information for parents of teens, including troubled teens, parenting tips, teen education, and more. |
| www.parentingteens.com |
|
|