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Good Vibrations
Esoteric vibrational remedies are really hot right now, especally in Hollywood -- the next step beyond aromatherapy. I Natural Health magazine says that even Julia Roberts is spraying herself with a Petaltone product to "clear her aura." of...
Herbs for Profection
If you have never used plant matter in magic before, I explain in detail in the column Plants, Herbs and Roots for Prosperity the different ways these substances can be practically used in rituals and everyday practice. In brief, the main methods...
The Giver Of Life
This article describes how we must respect nature and others because we are all connected
When I was in college, I had the pleasure of meeting the best English Professor in the world. Her name is Karen Peebles and she made me realize just how...
Video Games And Children Are Not Made To Be ‘Always’ Together
Many people think that video games and children are made for each other. As a result they never keep a check on their kids spending hours with these play machines. Though the ardent reality is children should not be always glued to the video games.
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Virginia Wine tour 5 days Southern Ways
Suggested Virginia FIVE day wine tour
Virginia Wine
The Southern Ways
James & Della Bogaty Owner Veramar Vineyard
Virginia Wine Country isn't just about wine. It is a lifestyle: gracious gardens, museums, dining out, nightlife, entertaining,...
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An examined life
Like far too many people I lived in and was raised by a family who believed the bottle and co-dependency was better then dealing with the "real world", real problems and real children.
So, I learned to be: The Chameleon Girl, ready to change to conform to anyone's mood, to leap to conclusions at a single bound, to become fearful faster then a rational
thought. I yearned to be something..anything special. I searched for the meaning of me..who am I..what do I believe. I did not know..could not know...was never given the freedom to learn how to explore the world, my opinions, my desires. To do that would be terrifying to my mother, father; it would have been seen as a denial of them, abandonment of them.
It was through me that my mother lived her life, and through me that my father found his comfort. I was confused and fearful. The only place I felt loved and cared for was at school and during Mass. It was there that I longed to become what I loved: A priest. I was crush when I could not become a priest, a woman preist. I felt lost.
In search of myself, my need to service God's people, I went to college to become a Social Worker. I married my college sweetheart, we created four wonderful children: two boys and twin girls.
During my early years of marriage, and being a mother, I worked part time dealing with Family in Crisis. It was demanding exhausting work with little reward. I discovered that many of the troubles that were present were from how the families saw themselves and each other: It was the atmosphere that was created.
My own experiences as a child, my work as a social worker, and my disenchantment with STEP as a parenting technique; I came to learn how important it was for me to be fully human and more positive, and "proactive", not just letting fate decide how I was to act about any situation, or let fear lead me as a parent.
Why the disenchantment with STEP? I believe that STEP, while having
many marvelous things going for it, stops short when trying to help families come out of their destructive patterns. The emphasis is on the child, not the parent. Parenting is one of the most profound and intense interrelationships we will have in our life times. Far more intense than our relationships with people with whom we chose. These relationships are “born” from us. Many of us see our children as extensions of ourselves and that often gets us into relationship and parenting difficulties. Women who believe that their issues are dealt with find that parenting brings hidden issues to the fore.
What is a proactive parent? A proactive parent understands that that parenting is a relational activity, which the rules that govern relationships with others work here as well; just with the added twist that the parent is in charge. A proactive parent understands that children are like sponges and will react as the parents react. A proactive parent understands that to truly be the best parent she can be is to understand herself as completely as possible.
I became convinced during my working years and as a parent that many problems have a more spiritual aspect: A feeling of worthlessness. Mothers, women often feel as if spirituality belongs to men; or their own experiences as children has left them feeling as if they are unworthy to be anything other than, "a loser." Because of my own personality, experience and understanding of myself, I went into formation for Spiritual Direction and created a ministry for mothers.
I have come back to writing late. When I was younger I wrote often, then stopped for many reasons. Now I am slowly coming back to journaling.
I learned that life truly is what YOU make it and there are rules to this game of life, and I have become a student of life to live it at my best.
About the Author
Sonny Perkowksi is a woman who has spent most of her adult life explore and examining her life.
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