I'm a candle addict and must've burned thousands of the things in my time. I've bought them, made them and even ruined them by displaying them in the wrong places.

Candlelight can dramatically change the mood of a room and although very trendy now, candles are, apart from primitive fires, the oldest mean of supplying light. References to candles can be found that date back as far as 3000 bc in Greece and Egypt although the oldest fragment of actual candle to have been found is considerably more modern as it's no more than about 2000 years old. It was found in Avignon, France.

Imagine yourself in medieval times when wax candles were used to light the great castles, halls, monasteries and churches of the time. Candles of the time certainly were as attractive as those we have today and aromatherapeutic qualities were non-existent. Even the candles of the rich were by no means attractive but the majority of people, being paupers, couldn't afford proper candles so they'd make their own by dipping rushes in leftover kitchen fat. Just the thought of what that must've smelt like is enough to make my stomach churn.

Things improved during the sixteenth century, especially for the poorest people who could now afford a pound of dark yellow tallow (animal fat) candles. The quality of light varied considerably, as tallow candles gave off a very dull light compared to wax. The very best candles were made of spermaceti, a wax derived from oil found in the head cavities of sperm whales. Spermaceti candles burned with such a bright light that the flame was used as a standard for light measurement but only the very wealthy could afford such a luxury. Obviously, these are no longer available.

Candle making machines were eventually invented during the nineteenth century. It was around the same time that a French chemist discovered that tallow was a composition of two fatty acids, stearic acid and oleic acid, combined with glycerine. By removing the glycerine, he invented stearine candles. These were harder than tallow and burned much longer and brighter. Eventually, paraffin wax, which is extracted from crude oil, was discovered and widely used as it equalled both beeswax and spermaceti for brightness and hardness but was much cheaper. Paraffin wax is still used today.

DISPLAY TIPS

- First of all, NEVER display candles where they're exposed to sunlight or spotlights. They'll fade and if left too long, will eventually bend. Trust me, floppy candles don't look good.

- If you want your table to look elegant, long tapered candles are the best choice. For anything informal, pillar candles are ideal.

- Place some stones (glass or natural) or shells in the bottom of a clear, wide bowl of water and light some floating candles. Sprinkling some petals on the water adds to the appeal. If you have pets, remember to remove the water before leaving the bowl unattended as drinking water with wax in it can give them an upset tummy and the petals of some plants are lethal when ingested.

- Personally, I think candles always look better grouped together. Arranged at different heights, they make more impact as 'ornaments' and give off more light. I one had 5 or 6 standing on a brass tray that'd been stuck down by dripping wax on to the tray in large blobs and pressing each candle into the warm wax. The extra stability made them safer to use and liking to keep things as leisurely as possible, the tray made it easy to move them from room to room.

- When positioning a candle between two people, the flame should always burn at least two inches below eye level. Why? You want eye contact don't you? There's nothing romantic about a flickering flame stopping you from gazing into each other's eyes and even if you're not into intimate meeting of the eye, it's still very annoying!

- If you want your candles to look shiny and clean when you light them, try rubbing them with a pair of old tights to remove dust and fingerprints. This'll bring back the sheen that's usually lost when the candle gets warm. Good job they're handy for something, eh?

BURNING TIPS

- Cold candles burn slower so pop them into the fridge for an hour or so before lighting them. Wrap them in foil or cling film first otherwise the wick will become damp and difficult to light. You wouldn't want a damp wick, would you?

- Never stand a lit candle in a draught. Draughts create a larger flame and uneven burning; not to mention how easily they can catch fabrics alight.

- If your candle is too slim for the holder, wrap some aluminium foil around the bottom to make a tighter fit.

- Do your pillar candles end up with high sides and a hole down the middle? To avoid this, always burn the candle for one hour per inch in diameter. That's the approximate time it takes for the wax to melt across the entire surface. In other words, unless you know you'll be burning your candle for at least 4

- If you've let a candle burn right down and the wax is stuck in the holder, put the holder into the freezer for a couple of hours and the wax should be easier to dig out.

- If you like tea lights, try to buy the kind that have metal cases as these are easy to remove from holders after use. If you only have the uncovered type, pour some water into the holder before lighting the candle. When it's extinguished and the wax has hardened, it should be easier to pop it out of the container. You do have to remove it as soon as it's hardened though otherwise you'll end up digging at it with a blunt knife or similar.

- Spilled wax should be allowed to solidify. Once it's hardened, cover the area with brown paper and gently press with a warm iron. The wax should be absorbed into the paper. It's always a good idea to stand your candle on or in something non-flammable though as the dye from coloured wax can be impossible to remove.

- Extinguish candles by pushing the wick into the liquid wax. Spent match sticks are good to use for this but whatever you choose to use, don't let it be your fingers. Molten wax is hot. Leave for about a minute, then re-centre the wick. Using this technique eliminates smoking from the extinguished wick and covers the wick with a layer of wax making re-lighting easier. If you're in a hurry and need to blow the candle out, hold your finger in front of the flame. The air will flow around your finger and extinguish it from both sides, preventing splattering.

- Never pour melted wax down the sink or toilet. Pour it into an empty milk carton or something similar and pop it in the bin.

SAFETY TIPS

- NEVER EVER LEAVE A BURNING CANDLE UNATTENDED. DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT! NEVER EVER!!!

- Keep burning candles away from flammable materials. Curtains, furniture, bedding, books and your own clothes are all potential hazards. Remember that drafts can easily blow lightweight curtains into the flame. I've never had any major problems with candles, but one did set fire to a paper napkin once.

- Never use a candle as a light source when you're looking for something in a storage cupboard. That's what torches are for.

- Always place candles on heat resistant surfaces. A friend of mine had one catch fire to the tablecloth. She managed to extinguish it before any major damage was done, but the table was ruined.

- Candles in glass containers are popular now. They're ever so pretty, with all sorts of bits and bobs embedded in the wax or gel, but if you use them, never let them burn down to more than half inch from the bottom of the container. If they melt completely, the heat could cause the container to crack.

Candles come in all shapes and sizes and you'll always find some that'll match your décor. They can usually be picked up cheap in pound shops and the likes, but I've found the best bargain candles are those from IKEA. They sell a bundle of about a dozen white candles for a couple of pounds and usually have a few different colours available, depending on what's fashionable at the time. Unlike some cheap candles, Ikea candles burn well, too. I use tea lights on the coffee table because they're unobtrusive and cheap. Cheap's good because it means I can burn candles as often as I like without having to stretch my budget too much.

It's nice to splash out now and then though, and hand made candles are one of the luxuries I like to have on special occasions and they make lovely gifts too. They're often found in little backstreet shops selling quirky interior design pieces but the net's also a huge source so it's worth having a surf around to see what you can turn up.

So now that you know what you need to know about candles, why don't you plan a nice meal (or call for a take-away if you're hopeless in the kitchen), turn down the lights and share a bottle of wine with the person you'd most like to snuggle up to in this world (no, not you're mum!).

Have fun.

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Having moved 20 times in her life, Sharon was in a position to understand the difficulties experienced by mature women wishing to develop new friendships. Understanding the problems fed Sharon's desire to be part of the solution rather than part of the problem and FriendsYourWay UK (www.friendsyourway.co.uk), a website dedicated to helping women in the UK find new, platonic friends in their own local areas, was developed.

Originally from East London, Sharon now lives in Cheshire with her partner Richard and two of her three children. She's been writing in one form or another all of her life and also enjoys reading, web design, knitting/crochet, pottering in her garden and long discussions about life that go on into the small hours, often accompanied by a bottle of rose wine.

Sharon can be contacted on sharon@friendsyourway.co.uk

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