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Accepting That You Are the Problem
Although many of you out there fancy yourselves as warm, loving, and competent fathers, you are sometimes the problem in your relationship with your kids. This may be difficult to hear, but if you make this secret the cornerstone of who you are as a...
“Discover True Magnificence - Moissanite Wedding Sets”
Beautiful moissanite wedding sets are now being sold over the counter across the world. The glamour and luxury that these moissanite wedding sets exuberate is something that cannot be explained by a sheer display of ornamental prose, it simply has...
Halloween Safety Tips
Halloween is an exciting night for children and a busy time for their parents. With such excitement, it’s easy for children to forget basic safety rules. When emotions are running high, it’s a good time to remember to “use your head.” Plan...
Kids Activities: How To Make Your Own Puppet Theaters And Finger Puppets
Your kids can make a puppet theater and an assortment of puppets all by themselves. Materials Needed a table for the theater a cloth that can cover the front and sides of the table, leaving the back exposed some stiff white...
What Is Homeschooling And How Do I know If It's Right For My Family?
Do you know what these famous people have in common? Alexander Graham Bell George Patton Albert Einstein Benjamin Franklin Winston Churchill Agatha Christie George Bernard Shaw Will Rogers If you guessed that they...
 
ANNOYING LONER-ANOTHER TRUE ROOMMATE STORY

I had transfered to a new college, and I had one good semester with two good roommates. However, we were sick of living in a triple, so next semester we decided to get doubles. They knew each other longer and decided to room together. The only other guy I knew who didn't have a roommate was someone I'll refer to as Stink (his last name was actually a synonym for smelly). I did know his last roommate moved out after the first semester, and he spent the second semester alone in a room which smelled awful by the end of the year. I thought maybe I could prevent this if I stopped it early.... how wrong I was.

In addition to being a slob, he was also an alcoholic (or at least aspiring to be). I started off by giving him fair warning that if he pukes on our carpet I would not clean it up and I reserved the right to punch him in the face. Unfortunately, this didn't come in handy.

Anyways, one day I walk in the room to see a large ball of toilet paper with a face drawn on it in marker, sitting on his bookshelf. Not even having to ask him, he says "I made him on the toilet, his name is Wilson." Sad? It gets worse. A month later some friends and me take "Wilson" and throw him down the steps and tear it up (it was revenge for him leaving ketchup packets on the floor for people to step on). He enters the room and immediately notices that "Wilson" is gone, and asks me about it. I told him the truth and he shuffles himself to the bathroom with his head down, only to come back 30 minutes later with an even bigger "Wilson".

In addition to being wierd, he was completely oblivious to the fact that someone else lived with him. He'd listen to music from his computer on his headphones, but it didn't make any difference with the volume on it's highest (I could make out all the lyrics).


The stupidest moment was when he wouldn't let me turn off his music he was playing off his PS2 at 4:00am because it was "helping him write his paper", or so he put it. I don't think he went to bed until about 6:00am. So to get back at him, I woke up at 10:00am to go to breakfast with my friends. I opened all the windows to let the brisk winter air in, turned up my speakers and played an hour long comedy routine as I walked out the door. I came back to hear him say, "Oh you left your speakers on when you left." and then "Do you know why it's cold in here?" (Keep in mind we live in a dorm room, the window is in plain sight).

My real revenge came when I was able to switch rooms for the next semester, but before I left I had the room to myself since he was home for Winter Break. I started with pouring a strong cologne all over his bed and clothes(to help his new roommate deal with the smell). To top things off, I put rancid mayonaise and eggs in a small dish and left them in his fridge over the month long break. The sad thing is, when I went to toss out the evidence at the end of the break... the room didn't smell any different from it's original foul smell.

I got lucky, because the worst of him came out after I moved out and the freshman moved in with him. One night he got drunk off 2 liters of a box of red wine by himself at 8:00pm on a Monday. Only to throw up all over his room and all over the bathroom, leaving the stink to sit for near a week. Oh, and his freshman roommate ended up cleaning up the mess in their room. What does this poor soul get in return? He wakes up to the sounds of Stink grunting and touching himself while standing over the freshman's bed and looking down at him.


About the Author

dan the roommate man

www.roommateexpress.com

 

PetSmart - Pet supplies and pet products for healthier, happier pets
Offering food, treats, collars, leashes, health products, shampoos, medication, toys, carriers, housing and other supplies for all pets.
www.petsmart.com
 
Pets 4 You.com - Dogs | Cats
A large resource for animal enthusiasts with a directory of breeders and links to sources offering pet supplies and products, and to rescues and shelters.
www.pets4you.com
 
Yahoo! Pets
Learn how to care for a new pet. Find information about breeds or adopt a dog. ... What questions on pets or pet nutrition do you have today? ...
pets.yahoo.com
 
Welcome to Healthypet.com!
Pet care resources by the American Animal Hospital Association to find a veterinarian, veterinary clinic or animal hospital for pets and provide pet care ...
www.healthypet.com
 
Dogs & Puppies - Next Day Pets
Directory of breeders and shelters with dogs and puppies for sale and pets for adoption. Search dogs and puppies by breed with information on 150+ dog ...
www.nextdaypets.com
 
Petfinder.com: Adopt a pet and help an animal shelter rescue a ...
Adopt a pet dog or cat from animal welfare organizations across the country.
www.petfinder.com
 
Welcome to Neopets!
A virtual pet website where visitors may adopt and care for pets, as well as play games and participate in contests, communities, and combat simulations.
www.neopets.com
 
Chicago Tribune | Pets
Click one of the buttons to show pets within that category. Click here to show all pets for sale. Search Tips. (e.g., Beagle, Persian) ...
www.legacy.com
 
Pet - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
A pet is an animal kept for companionship and enjoyment, as opposed to ... Some horse-like animals are suitable for human companionship as pets or as work ...
en.wikipedia.org
 
Pets - Pet Breeders Pet Information Pet Classifieds
Pets - Pet, Hobby and Show Animals Pets Online Has Puppies For Sale, Pet Products, Pet Shops.
www.mypets.net.au
 
Defra, UK - Animal health and welfare - Bringing pets to Britain
Travel guide and information on qualifications, requirements, and fees for bringing a pet into the UK.
www.defra.gov.uk
 
Defra, UK - Animal health and welfare - Pet Travel Scheme
The Pet Travel Scheme (PETS) is the system that allows pet dogs, ... For travel to France, the passport also replaces the PETS 5 certificate. ...
www.defra.gov.uk
 
Indiatimes - Pets
/photo.cms?msid=968871. You can post him queries and problems about your pets. ... Other beautiful animals: pets, wild cats & butterflies. PET ZODIACS ...
pets.indiatimes.com
 
AVMA Care for Pets Home Page
Articles that tell how to select a pet, how to care for various types of pets, and how to cope with the death of a pet. Includes a section just for kids.
www.avma.org
 
Dog and Pet T-Shirts and Gifts at CafePress.com : Shop Over 35 ...
Pet Gifts. Pet Gifts. Pet owners unite with fun t-shirts, hats and more. See all results... Categories within Pet Gifts ...
www.cafepress.com
 
Pet Lover Gifts : Find & Buy Gifts at CafePress.com
Shop millions of unique and custom pet designs - such as dog, cat, bunny, horse and other animals - available on t-shirts, mugs, mousepads, posters, ...
www.cafepress.com
 
PETS 911 ­ pet adoptions thru local animal shelters
Offers hotline for lost and found pets, adoption, veterinarians, and animal shelters.
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Pets
Most of us think of adopting pets for all the wrong reasons.. as a ... Pets has a way of listening without judging and loving its owner unconditionally. ...
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Mara Pets Games - Play Free Flash Games, Dress Up Games and ...
Mara Pets Games is a free virtual pet site with fun flash games and character dress up games. Three new games weekly!
www.marapets.com
 
Canada's pet information center for dogs cats and humans
Canadian pet information centre, featuring articles, bulletin board, dog breed profiles, cat breeds, and ask the vet sections.
www.pets.ca
 
 

 
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