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A Wedding For What?
Once the actual purpose of a wedding had much more to do with property, parenthood and moral propriety in the eyes of the community. And those 3 elements were strongly interlinked, particularly among those members of society who made the rules. ...

Brin in the Coach, I'm Ready to Play
I get letters …emails, that is. Inquiries from prospective clients. They ask the only questions they know how to ask in seeking a coach, admittedly a hard thing to do when you’ve never had a coach, and their questions reveal as much to me, in this...

Surprising New Info about Children, Allergies and Pets
Have you wondered whether to get your child a pet or not? Does your family have a history of allergies and have you been told by your pediatrician it’s not a good idea? There’s interesting news from the Medical College of George (MCG), evidence...

The Some Of The Bits??
The whole is understood as something more than the sum of the parts. When a student is learning to paint murals or to draw, it is wise to tease out the elements of design and consciously practice them separately. Once understood the elements...

We All Wish That Our Children have Good Virtues, but... Are We Setting A Good Example Ourselves?
We all wish that our children should not smoke or drink, should not speak lies, should not steal, should not have a violent nature, etc... but are we setting a good example ourselves? Just yesterday, I was at a friend's place and his daughter...

 
Smelling the Roses: Better Living Through Savoring

“Stop and smell the roses,” people often say. Then they smile ruefully, because everybody knows there isn’t enough TIME to stop or, as my daughter says, to “chill.”

This is the Conventional Wisdom – and I’m here to tell you that the CW is simply WRONG. Researchers in Positive Psychology find that people actually get more done if they take time out to SAVOR their day. Not only that, but, over time, people who set aside a few hours every week are likely to be healthier, more relaxed, and better able to cope with the stresses of everyday life.

Why not try it? Give yourself the gift of Savoring. (Hey, stress is all you have to lose!)

To start, make a list of 10 things you REALLY enjoy doing, whether or not you’ve made time for them lately. I’m talking about stuff that gives you real pleasure. They may be things you do alone, or with one other person, or with a group. Look over the list, and see if one thing says “pick me.” Choose one of those activities that you enjoy.

Now: Take out your calendar, and SOME TIME IN THE NEXT MONTH, block out at least a 2-hour period that is JUST FOR YOU. Half a day is better. A whole day is best of all. Do whatever is needed to make that time free. Ask a neighbor to baby-sit. Tell your spouse you’ll be busy. Say “no” to the half-dozen requests that will almost certainly challenge your Savoring Time .

And when Your Day comes . . . GO FOR IT, whether you’re making a picture, walking in the


woods, going to a movie, or just sitting still. What matters is that you’re doing something you really enjoy.

These tricks will help you get the most out of your day:

•Give yourself permission – this is Your Day. It is absolutely 100% okay for you to be taking this time. When kill-joy thinking comes along (and it will), play with it. Pretend it’s a stick floating in a stream, and just let it drift away.
•Leave your cel phone at home, or at least turned off. You’re busy savoring, remember?
•Keep the day alive – collect a souvenir or take mental photographs to help you hold on to this special time.
•Tell the story – Share your experience with a friend or partner – the joy that’s shared multiples by ten.
•Write it down. Read it over as a reminder in a few days or weeks.

When your Savoring time is over, celebrate! Pat yourself on the back for challenging the Conventional Wisdom. And, while you’re at it, why not take out your calendar and make another date for Savoring Your Day?

(c) M. Killoran, 2004

Maureen is a certified Authentic Happiness Life Coach and Unitarian minister. Her passion is helping mid-life women and couples achieve lives of meaning and creativity, through her coaching practice, SpiritQuest LLC. She offers workshops, coaching, rites of passage, e-courses, a free monthly e-zine, and more -- check out her website www.spiritquest.ws


 

Encyclopedia of Psychology - Psychology Websites
A hierarchical database of links to psychology resources.
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Psychology.Com
Psychology.com provides online counseling from your choice of therapists. From depression to anxiety, relationships to parenting, we can help you work ...
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psychology virtual library
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Intute: Social Sciences - Psychology
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Psychology Today: Find a Therapist and News to Use
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Social Psychology Network
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Psychology and mental health at Psych Central .
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Google Directory - Science > Social Sciences > Psychology
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Open Directory - Science: Social Sciences: Psychology
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Classics in the History of Psychology
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