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20 Predictions for the Future of EQ
EQ isn’t just a “designer” fad that’s going to fade, and many are interested to see what directions it will take in the coming years. Here are some of my predictions: 1.Emotional Intelligence will become a household word. Parents will actively...

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Is There A Place For God In The Corporate World
Is there a place for God in the corporate world? Can spirituality provide us with a competitive advantage? Yes it can, says Ian Mitroff, co-author of A Spiritual Audit of Corporate America. Indeed spiritual intelligence courses and...

Passion's Search for Destiny
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Short Story: A Possible Future.
Roger Ricketson’s smile was enigmatic. When anyone looked his way they could not help being infected by his contagious facial expression. Something was definitely going right in this man’s life, but until now no one could quite put his or her...

 
Practice, Practice, Practice


It may sound silly but the key to self-confidence and building more self-esteem is through practice. Practice what it is you want to feel more confident about and eventually, the confidence will show itself. That makes sense if we're talking about a skill like playing the piano. With enough practice, you naturally begin to get good at it and then you feel more confident. But what about tougher things like public speaking or meeting new people? How do you practice something that you're terrified to do in the first place?

If you have extreme self-esteem issues then you might want to seek professional help, but if you've determined that isn't necessary, I would suggest that you start out by finding something that you genuinely love to do. Other than maybe reading books or doing crossword puzzles over coffee, most hobbies are a good place to start. Do you love to paint? Do you love to play a musical instrument? Do you love athletics? Find something that you love to do or that you think you would love to do. It's not important what it is other than that it would bring you into contact with people on a tiny level. Unless you're living in a cave somewhere, somebody is going to see your art work, hear your music, or see you running around practicing your sport. You don't have to pick a big team oriented thing, just something that fascinates you and will be noticeable. Then do it. Learn to draw, take music lessons, start playing basketball in your own driveway, whatever, just start doing something that you can really enjoy.

Keep doing it until you get really good at it. It doesn't have to necessarily be your career, but that would be fun for you if it was. Practice often and with complete joy. Lose yourself in it. That's part of overcoming self-confidence issues is forgetting to think about you. Swim laps at the pool until you forget to care how you look. Get lost in something other than analyzing yourself. Fall in love with some hobby that takes your mind away from what others might think of you. Just keep practicing something you love until you get really good at it. It's your hobby and your love, so don't make any judgments over whether or not it's stupid to like doing whatever it is that you like doing. Just get on with it.

When you're in the moment -- writing music or designing websites or whatever it is you've chosen, take a moment to reflect on how far you've come. At some point, you're going to realize that you're not too bad. At another point, you'll even think, "Hey, I'm pretty good at this." Someday, you'll look up and notice that you're an expert or at the very least awesome at what you've chosen to do. Take that growing self-confidence that's connected to your hobby and begin channeling it into other areas. Depending on how much of a self-esteem problem you started out with it could be a matter of months or years before you are able to really see yourself in a new light. It's one thing to say that everyone has their unique and special talent. It's quite another to find and embrace your own.

Your talent will not be something you hate doing. Sure, I'm really very good at scrubbing the bathroom. You can


conduct a white glove inspection when I'm done, but that's not my special talent. That's not my special gift to the world. And it sure as heck never built an ounce of self-confidence for me. No, you have to really truly deeply love what it is you're doing or the talent won't show itself. You have to forget to think and lose all track of time while zoning out in the flow of creating, building, stretching, and growing with the hobby. Get to the point that when you look up and notice what you've done, that you're impressed with yourself. Practice until you get to that point where you forget to judge yourself. You could very well end up making it into your career if there's a market for it. If there isn't, no harm done. You have got to build a can-do attitude around your ability to do something well.

Once you've learned something that well, you can begin stretching beyond your comfort zone and trying other things like public speaking. Okay so that might not happen right away, but once you've really mastered something, then you can always remind yourself that you are capable of success and you are capable of learning something new. Once you know that you can practice and learn new things, then the fear of new things isn't nearly so immobilizing. You can step beyond your fears knowing that with enough practice you can master almost anything you set your mind to. At that point, you won't actually have a self-esteem problem anymore.

The point is that by playing around with something you love until you are very good at it, you will gain self-esteem and that is going to make it possible for you to hold your head high and to bravely step into other more frightening areas of life. Start out by practicing at something you love until you're good at it, then move on to the other things that don't sound like much fun at all. You'll really know deep down that there's nothing to be afraid of. It all comes down to whether or not you believe that you are capable of learning something new. That's all. Self-confident people reassure themselves when walking into unknown territory by saying, "Well, I'll just have to wing it until I learn how to do it right. I'm sure I'll figure it out soon enough." That comes from experiencing the positive effects of having practiced and learned something new. So go learn something new -- start with something fun.

Copyright 2004, Skye Thomas, Tomorrow's Edge

Skye Thomas is the CEO of Tomorrow's Edge, an Internet leader in inspiring leaps of faith. She became a writer in 1999 after twenty years of studying spirituality, metaphysics, astrology, personal growth, motivation, soulmates, and parenting. Her books and articles have inspired people of all ages and faiths to recommit themselves to the pursuit of happiness. After years of high heels and business clothes, she is currently enjoying working from home in her pajamas. To read more of her articles, sign up to receive her free weekly newsletter, and get free previews of her books go to http://www.TomorrowsEdge.net.


Skye@TomorrowsEdge.net


 

Spirituality.com: from the Christian Science Publishing Society
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  • 10 basic health habits

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  • choosing our parents

  • christmas for one mental health over the holidays

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  • components of a life purpose

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  • conversational negative self talk

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  • courage is a gift

  • creating miracles with passion

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  • discover the missing key to improving your health

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  • divining your karmic number

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  • does prayer really work

  • do not believe all you read in the holy books

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  • do what you love love what you do

  • dream interpretation archetypal symbols in dreams

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  • drug rehab 12 steps or less

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  • embracing your wildness

  • emotional baggage

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  • fairies and mental health

  • faith and depression

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  • female masturbation excessive indulgence and how to contain the act

  • feminism

  • finding direction finding passion series 2 of 3

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  • fitness

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  • forgiveness stories definition quotes power to forgive vested with human beings

  • freedom

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  • gods abiding love

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  • heal thyself first

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  • higher self growing inside of us

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  • how to decorate a room for just 35

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  • hurried woman syndrome 5 tips to get the balance back

  • if you really want to help the victims of katrina

  • im fighting this war too in my way

  • im sorry but

  • index

  • individualistic sucess models

  • individualized positive affirmations for improving self esteem

  • infidelity discovered 10 ways to calm your powerful feelings

  • introduction to flower essences

  • in search of self

  • in the begining

  • is america losing its religion

  • is america ready for a low carb spiritual diet

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  • is there a place for god in the corporate world

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  • its never too late to say i love you

  • its not my job to free tibet

  • its not what you think

  • i am really worried about the future

  • i want to create

  • jesus birthday sacred children series 2 of 3

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  • just do it

  • keeping faith

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  • keys to prosperity

  • kundalini awakening definition and the path

  • largest pagan occult and new age gathering the chicagoland area has ever seen

  • learn about love by reading poetry by a long dead poet named rumi

  • letter to a katrina survivor

  • letting go of our negativity

  • lies kill hearts

  • life balance coaching

  • life balance coaching balance work and life like a pro

  • limiting perceptions and broadening horizons

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  • love is in the air five steps into joyful abundance

  • love vs fear volume 18

  • low carb and lowfat diets a scam

  • magic spells paranormal cures or mind over matter

  • make 2002 your best year ever

  • making better decisions

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  • management from within

  • mary poppins and the principle that life is supposed to be fun

  • masculine energy versus feminine energy

  • medical miracle or mistake

  • mental diet food for the soul

  • mindfulness and neuroscience lets make a deal

  • mind body spirit healing vs traditional psychotherapy psychoanalysis

  • moksha salvation in hinduism highlights concept and the path

  • more magical affirmations

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  • mythology parables in modern communication part 2

  • my inner what

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  • new age motivational tools

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  • nothing ever stays the same

  • nothing is darker than midnight and it lasts one minute

  • no invitation needed sacred children series 3 of 3

  • nurturing your spirit

  • one humanity

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  • on being a foreigner

  • origin of certain thoughts part i

  • origin of certain thoughts part ii

  • our feelings and attitudes around happily ever after

  • out of the closet

  • passions search for destiny

  • passion and soulfulness

  • passion versus detachment

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  • petitioning for your needs

  • philosophy and cancer treatment

  • pioneering insanity

  • playing the numbers home buying and selling

  • practice practice practice

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  • putting spirit first goals for your soul

  • quick fixes happiness in a bottle

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  • regrets ive had a few healing through liberation from regret and denial

  • reincarnation sacred children series 1 of 3

  • relationship saver

  • religion and spirituality what differentiates religion from spirituality

  • religion and technology

  • religion and techology is 21st century religion only a click away from god

  • reveal the leader within

  • rewriting the story

  • rituals

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  • searchers follow ancient traditions

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  • self care

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  • sensual and spiritual erotic art

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  • sex and the soul

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  • shadows

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  • short story a possible future

  • should you forgive infidelity

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  • so am i projecting our qualities

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  • spirituality blues for buddha

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  • spiritual fitness get your chakras in shape

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  • stress spirituality part 1

  • surrender if you wish to conquer

  • take a look around do you think things are balanced in our world

  • taking back christmas

  • taking personal stock

  • tarot cards tarot readings

  • teaching the body health

  • tempering temper

  • ten powerful keys to healing yourself

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  • these are the signs of the times

  • the aggression of big cities

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  • the american dream are we really free

  • the art of giving pleasure out of fullness

  • the benefits of meditation tips and techniques

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  • the choice

  • the cliche of balance

  • the coach approach

  • the dating scene signs of a promising relationship

  • the disciplines of success

  • the dollar bill game

  • the endless pursuit of happiness

  • the first ninety days

  • the first step

  • the five essential secrets of managing your energy successfully

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  • the four elements

  • the freedom to fall

  • the good the bad and the ugly

  • the importance of spirituality

  • the joan of arc complex

  • the joy of tantric massage

  • the kabbalah of rosh hashana from tears to transformation

  • the kabbalah of yom kippur rising above time

  • the law of attraction in action

  • the leadership development plan

  • the loneliness of personal growth

  • the new age movement

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  • the pleasure of simple things

  • the power of intention

  • the power of our thoughts

  • the power of personal environments

  • the power of positive affirmations

  • the power of witnessing and segment intending

  • the pursuit of happiness

  • the reality of fairies

  • the real kama sutra is not tantra but heres why you should be interested in both

  • the road to inner peace

  • the spirit of change

  • the subconscious link to our computer desktop

  • the three you

  • the toilet philosophy

  • the top 10 design tools for enhancing your spiritual connectedness

  • the value of affirmations

  • the writer as activist

  • things are good because i say they are

  • this was not my plan

  • time do you spend it or invest it

  • time do you spend or invest it

  • top 10 powerful keys to healing yourself

  • toxic friendships

  • to be is to become

  • to find balance retreat

  • to hell in a handbasket men who crash and burn

  • to lie or not to lie

  • to love forever

  • to witness t he l ife t hat is god

  • training or television working out when youre not well

  • trends in gift giving jewelry a timeless favorite

  • trusting the universe or not

  • turning obstacles into blessings

  • two types of spirituality faith and knowledge

  • wellness

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  • we all send signals

  • we shouldnt have burnt the witches philosophy and cancer treatment

  • what if i fall flat on my face

  • what in the world is life coaching

  • what is ayurvedic medicine

  • what is enlightenment meaning definition and its relation to self realization

  • what is reiki

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  • what is your recovery rate

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  • what i learned from a parakeet

  • what kind of yoga and meditation leads to gaining enlightenment in this life

  • what will we do

  • whose thought is it anyway

  • who is pushing your buttons

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  • why being spiritual can get you nowhere

  • why is this happening to me again an interview with dr michael ryce

  • why keep a journal

  • why make a new years resolution when you can make a one decision

  • why my man behaving strangely

  • why should we keep our thoughts clear

  • will yoga help you lose more weight

  • worldly balance

  • yoga and meditation that leads to gaining enlightenment in this life

  • your life your values

  • your money or your life

  • you are never alone

  • you can influence your fortunes in life

  • you gotta be

  • you gotta be positive