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7 Hot Tips for Improving Your Life
I won't be long-winded about this, I am going to lay down 7 simple steps to help you improve your life. It will only be a few pages long and will be a quick read. Whether you implement the steps I give you is your decision alone, they are...
7 Tips to Help You Avoid Buying a Destructive Soap or Cleanser if You Have a Skin Problem.
Psoriasis, dermatitis, eczema, and any other skin problems are irritated very easily by most soaps. As a former psoriasis sufferer I would estimate I tried at least 30 different soaps hoping that would cure my psoriasis. I later discovered I was...
Canadian Immigration
Successful Canadian Immigration One of the most disheartening things I hear about Canadian Immigration is the stories of families who return to their original country after unsuccessfully attempting to settle in Canada. One of the main reasons for...
What is Coaching?
Recently, I have received several emails asking me about coaching and what it is exactly. So, I decided to answer some of those questions in this article. First, of all let me start with what coaching is not. Coaching is not therapy or...
When Is It Time To Stop Gambling?
Do you sometimes wish you could continue gambling for just a few more minutes? Do you stop when you've had enough of a good time or because your money has run out? Here are some budget-stretching ideas.You can use four basic methods to make your...
 
Anger and The American Family: Learn to Respond Rather than React

Case #1. Brianna, 32, would get instantly outraged when her ex-husband threatened to file for custody of their two small children. Deciding to respond differently, she bit her tongue, and remained quiet when he began threatening an escalated legal battle. Unable to get the usual reaction from her, he calmed down and instantly became rational and more reasonable.

Case #2. Tom, 42, would become ballistic reacting to his 17 year old daughter who refused to see she was dating a “loser” boy. The more he yelled, the deeper she dug her heels and refused to give up the boy.

Applying the anger management tool of “respond instead of react”, Tom decided to try something different by including the boy into the family activities (as much as he could stand). After about three weeks of this, the daughter—on her own—decided her “prince-charming” wasn’t the person she needed to enhance her life and ended the relationship.

Learn to be flexible

Individuals who practice good health do not continue behavior that doesn’t achieve desired results. Instead, they adjust—or fine tune—their responses depending on the situation.

There are many advantages to learning to be more flexible—and “response-able”— in dealing with the stresses and frustrations in your life.

At the top of the list is a sense of empowerment. It just feels good to know that you are in charge of your responses, instead of being controlled by other people or circumstances.

Case # 3. Sixty-four year old Lynn left anger management class one night to find her apartment completely flooded due to a burst water pipe.

Adding to her stress, her insurance company initially refused to pay her claim. She later told us, “I decided to use the tool you taught us of responding instead of reacting, so I cleaned up the whole place myself. I can’t tell you how wonderful and liberating it felt to know that I didn’t have to get upset.

Later, calmer, she recontacted her insurance agent who, this time, agreed to honor her claim! Learn to respond differently.

Step 1: Examine your attitude.


Negative voices in your head can be quite convincing —persuading you to judge others, be pessimistic, or think negatively, while creating the destructive feelings that go along with destructive thoughts.

Try to create a louder, more persuasive voice that helps you identify an equally believable, more optimistic viewpoint.

Step 2: Regulate your emotions. There are many ways to regulate your emotions and feelings in your life, including being your own best friend, eating well, exercising, playing, listening to uplifting music, getting in touch with a spiritual system, and creating emotional connections with others by sincere listening.

Step 3: Try alternative behaviors. Behaving differently is one of the most effective ways to show response flexibility and get different results in your life.

But, doing things differently is not easy! We are all creatures of habit and we tend to continue behaving in comfortable and familiar ways.

One of the challenges in behaving differently is, of course, coming up with ideas on how else we can behave differently in various situations.

Start by understanding that much of our behavior is determined by a feeling or emotion we are having—or we wish to have. But a specific behavior does not HAVE to be connected with that feeling.

Try alternative behaviors when you get those angry feelings by asking yourself, “What are some other ways I can deal
with this situation?”

Often they include behaviors like taking a brisk walk, assertively communicating with your family member, taking a timeout, picking your battles, or listening to soothing music.

Ask yourself: What are some other ways I can deal with this situation?

2005 © Dr. Tony Fiore All rights reserved. Dr. Tony Fiore (www.angercoach.com) is a So. California licensed psychologist, and anger management trainer. His company, The Anger Coach, provides anger and stress management programs, training and products to individuals, couples, and the workplace. Sign up for his free monthly newsletter "Taming The Anger Bee" at www.angercoach.com

 

The Alternative Dictionaries
Includes a list of slang terms and phrases in various languages.
www.notam02.no
 
Free-Codecs.com :: Download Real Alternative 1.51 : Real ...
Download Real Alternative 1.51 : Real Alternative will allow you to play RealMedia files without having to install RealPlayer/RealOne Player.
www.free-codecs.com
 
Free-Codecs.com : QuickTime Alternative 1.76 final : QuickTime ...
Download QuickTime Alternative 1.76 : QuickTime Alternative will allow you to play QuickTime files (.mov, .qt and other extensions) without having to ...
www.free-codecs.com
 
AlterNet: Home
Syndication service and online community of the alternative press, featuring news stories from alternative newsweeklies, magazines and web publications.
www.alternet.org
 
Open Directory - Health: Alternative
the entire directory, only in Health/Alternative ... "Alternative" search on:. AltaVista - A9 - AOL - Ask - Clusty - Gigablast - Google - Lycos - MSN ...
dmoz.org
 
Alternative Radio
A weekly one-hour public affairs radio program that provides analyses and views that are ignored or distorted in most media.
www.alternativeradio.org
 
The Alternative Medicine Homepage
Information on unconventional, unorthodox, unproven, or alternative, complementary, innovative, integrative therapies. Maintained by Charles B. Wessel, ...
www.pitt.edu
 
Alternative Medicine, Home for Natural Remedies & Healthy Solutions
Complementary and alternative medicine information about common health conditions, including natural remedies, holistic healthcare, healing foods, ...
www.alternativemedicine.com
 
Alternative rock - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Alternative rock (also called alternative music [1] or simply ... The music now known as alternative rock was known by a variety of terms before ...
en.wikipedia.org
 
EERE: Alternative Fuels Data Center Home Page
Provides information on alternative vehicle fuels and transportation technologies and related legislation. The center also distributes the newsletter ...
www.eere.energy.gov
 
Alternative Comics: Publisher of cool comic books & graphic novels
Alternative Comics, publishers of cool comic books, releases some of the most original and intelligent titles being created today.
www.indyworld.com
 
Alternative Tentacles - Store
Alternative Tentacles Records supplies the world with punk rock music from the Dead Kennedys, Nomeansno, and Jello Biafra. Featuring secure online ordering.
www.alternativetentacles.com
 
Google Directory - Health > Alternative
Related Categories: Health > Animal > Alternative Medicine (498) Science > Science in Society > Skeptical Inquiry (179) ...
www.google.com
 
The Alternative Museum
Free of physical restrictions, it presents online digital exhibitions, and live webcast events. Headed by international curators with cyber artist ...
www.alternativemuseum.org
 
Centre for Alternative Technology Home Page
CAT aims to 'inspire, inform, and enable' people to live more sustainably. A solutions driven organisation, offering practical solutions to environmental ...
www.cat.org.uk
 
Los Angeles Alternative
LA's only alternative weekly that is locally-owned and independent, bringing you the people, arts and ideas that make Los Angeles the center of the ...
www.laalternative.com
 
NewsLink | Newspapers | U.S. | Alternative
Updated links to all Alternative newspapers (US) from NewsLink Associates.
newslink.org
 
 

 
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