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Addicted To Her
Direct Answers - Column for the week of August 4, 2003
I dated a woman I work with for four years. In both our minds we were soul mates. A year and a half ago she broke it off. I never found out the real reasons.
After we broke up she would...
Controlling Behavior, Loving Behavior
The following article is offered for free use in your ezine, print publication or on your web site, so long as the author resource box at the end is included. Notification of publication would be appreciated. Title: Controlling Behavior, Loving...
FAQs About Internet Dating
If you’re interested in meeting new people to date, the Internet match services are a great new option. The number of people joining them is staggering. If you’re new to the experience, here’s an FAQ for you: Q: How can I be sure he’s not...
Is Conflict Healthy In Marriage?
Today my three-year-old daughter told my husband that she wants to be married. When he asked her why, she replied, "Because you get to be nice to one another".
Are you nice to your partner? Or do you find yourself involved in heated competition,...
Why Aren't YOU Using This Marriage Saving Tip?
Do you find that things would just be so much easier if your spouse would do things your way? Most of the time, this just isn't the case.
So you married your complete opposite, your relationship is stressful and the two of you can't even agree on...
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Dating Tip for Women: Don't Work Too Hard
Remember Jerry Hall, the model who married Mick Jagger? Jerry was famous for making this statement:
"My mother said it was simple to keep a man. You must be a maid in the living room, a cook in the kitchen, and a whore in the bedroom."
I don't know about you, but if keeping a man meant all that work, I'd have stayed single.
In addition to that pearl of wisdom, Ms. Hall offered this one: "Even if you have only two seconds, drop everything and give him (oral sex). That way he won't really want sex with anyone else."
Poor Jerry. Too bad her mother didn't tell her that if a man tends to want sex with "anyone else," he's not great husband material.
Sadly, despite all her hard work, Mick Jagger continued to have sex with other people and fathered a child with another model during his marriage to Hall. They are now divorced. So much for keeping a man!
The point? No guy is worth running yourself ragged for. Instead of appreciating your efforts, he will likely take you for granted and come to resent you. Think about it: Do you fall for guys who are at your beck and call all the time? They're great for helping you move, but you probably wouldn't marry one.
All right. Let's say you decide to move in with a guy. Before you run out to Bed Bath & Beyond,
it's absolutely imperative that you talk to your boyfriend about sharing household chores. It's not romantic, but you'll save yourself much misery in the end. And whatever you do, don't get off on the wrong foot by cooking dinner every night and doing his laundry.
Resist any and all impulses to "wife and mother" the guy. Otherwise, he'll take you for granted, or even worse, marry you and expect you to be his servant for the rest of your life. And that's definitely not romantic!
Allow a man to cook for you for a change. Let him do your laundry every now and then. There's no reason to expect him to be your maid in the living room, cook in the kitchen, or whore in the bedroom, but every once in a while it wouldn't hurt.
Remember: You have a lot to offer (if you don't believe me, take out a pen and paper and write down a list of the qualities that make you special; emphasize things like your sense of humor, leave off your ability to fold a fitted sheet).
Don't let a guy do you any favors. Keep this in mind: You're a great girl, and he'd be lucky to have you.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Terry Hernon MacDonald is the author of "How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams." Visit her website at http://www.marrysmart.com
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