|HOW TO CREATE A GOOD SELF IMAGE
The Man In The Looking Glass
"When you get what you want in your struggle for self and the world makes you king for a day Then go to a mirror and look at yourself and see what your face has to say for it isn't your father, or mother or wife who judgement upon you must pass the one who means most in your life everyday is the face looking back from the glass you may follow the whole world down the pathway of life and get pats on your back as you pass but your final reward will be heartache and tears if you've cheated the man in the glass."
Every successful person knows the vital role that their self- image, or the picture they hold of themselves, plays in their success. This snapshot is probably the most important single factor, which will determine how successful you will be in life - it is your destiny. I firmly believe that holding a poor self-image short-circuits a person's chances of success.
Your self-image is what you feel about yourself at the deepest level. It is your truth - because you subconsciously believe it about yourself. One's self image (especially with sensitive people) is a very fragile thing. It can be severely damaged by the loss of job, separation, divorce, mental breakdown or other trauma. Once broken it has to be slowly rebuilt, brick by brick, which sometimes can take a number of years before the person becomes their old self once again.
The people closest to you have a significant impact on ones self-image. If they don't believe in you, it makes it very hard to move forward in your life.
How you see yourself personally and professionally also determines the level of your own motivation. A positive self-image means that your sub-conscious mind can be controlled by eliminating negative thoughts and attitudes. Your subconscious mind determines your ATTITUDE to events and experiences. It is not what happens to you that is important - it is HOW you react to events: The "90% - 10% rule"!
"I am upset not by events, but rather by the way I view them."
Holding a good self image means seeing yourself as a unique and significant person - one who has a meaningful part to play in the world. You then add greater MEANING and PURPOSE to your life.
If you have a strong inner belief in yourself and your values, you can change your behaviour subjectively by changing your attitudes of mind or your inner beliefs. This is what is known as "self talk". For example: You can turn a negative attitude about your weaknesses to a positive one regarding your strengths. Don't get bogged down with circumstances. The 'loser' with a negative self image often blames others for their adverse circumstances in life and usually suffers from feelings of depression. This negative self image then becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, as failure follows failure in their life. So that a "cycle of despair" sets in. Very hard to break out!
On the other hand, the person with a good self image EXPECTS to live up to their expectations and achieve success, which is what usually happens. If you feel good about yourself, the brain sends out positive messages to
your body (as seen in one's body language); so that you can act confidently and give off positive "vibes". This in turn develops confidence, which makes you feel more positive about "having a go" at something you would not normally tackle.
A positive attitude (ie. spirit of optimism ) is absolutely essential in the path towards success in whatever endeavour in life you may choose.
We all know and envy those people who project an aura of confidence and success. Don't we?
Thus, self image is a vital self-management skill... and, like all skills,
it needs constant exercise to nourish, strengthen and grow:
"Water the flowers, instead of the weeds in your garden."
How long has it been since we visited ourselves by looking closely at ourselves?
The technical word for this is introspection (loved by those "psycho types").
How Do You See Yourself Now?
1. What do you do well?
2. What do you like most about yourself?
3. What results/achievements are you most proud of?
Your self image can be an 'invisible ceiling'. Don't sell yourself short, because everyone has the potential to do anything. "If you can think it, you can do it." Aim high. If you train fleas to jump in a glass jar, even if you remove the jar,
they do not jump any higher (it's a conditioned response).
Don't be a flea! Say to yourself:
"I need to lift the lid of my unlimited potential."
Lifting the Lid
Self imposed ceiling
HOW DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN THE FUTURE?
Write a short note to yourself on who you want to be and what you want to achieve by the years 2003 and 2005 (perhaps even 2010, as the years fly by so fast, as we get older). Utilise visual imagery (or mental pictures) and talk to yourself in a quiet place. Stillness is the key.
Make a decision to change (if you want to) and where you want to go in life. Involve yourself in clear specific goals.
Enough about goal-setting. That's the subject of another article!
So work on your self image daily by affirming that you are "unique and special" . A person with individual gifts and talents. You DO have something totally unique to contribute to the world... by "simply being YOU."
The Special Person You Were Meant to Be
If you can value truth above approval, and friendship over power, wealth, or fame,
If you can share your gifts wisely, leaving someone better off than when you came,
If you find happiness, simple pleasures, and see the rainbow, not the falling rain ,
If you have faith to keep on believing in miracles that no one can explain,
If you live every day to your potential and find the goal in everything you see,
Then you'll be, not just happy and successful, but the person only you were meant to be.
My various books* may be viewed at: http://www.nzenterprise.com/writer/books.html and