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A Refreshing Approach To A Family New Year
With a new year, we say goodbye to the past and hello to the future. What can we do in the present moment to bring closure to last year and hope for what lies ahead? For families, it can be a time to celebrate and learn from the previous year. It is...
Catch-22
Direct Answers - Column for the week of February 16, 2004
I have been married for a little over seven years, with one 2-year-old son and another on the way. Over time, I believe my wife and I have grown apart. Sexually, we never connected.
...
Feng Shui Atrracts Money
The first thing that you need to do is get yourself a good compass and determine what is in the southeastern corner of your home. The Southeastern sector of your home governs both your cash flow as well as your faith in the idea that you will...
"Mid-Life and Looking for a Guy? Help is Here,"
Are all
the "good ones" married? Are men your age only interested in women 20
years younger? Is it "impossible" to meet men?
Okay, although logic never convinces anyone
of anything, let's counter some of these silly ideas. Yes,...
Raising Emotionally Intelligent Sons
“Mommy, I fell down,” said the 5-year-old to his mother during a recent soccer practice. “Were you tough?” asked his mom. “Yeah,” he said and walked away with his head down. I was at this soccer practice with my daughter, and feeling just a bit...
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The Power To Succeed
It’s amazing how we fool ourselves... while at the same time believing we are doing what’s best.
Let me give you an example. I overheard a guy telling a group of friends, over drinks, how he had become fed-up with work. Guys being guys, they immediately started to come up with options to fix the problem – ideas like changing company and changing jobs. That was when the guy got all logical…
‘Yeah, but I need to pay the mortgage and my kid’s education and we’ve got a holiday planned for the Bahamas and…’
I interrupted. ‘How much do you need?’
‘A hundred grand a year,’ he replied.
‘What’s more important,’ I asked, ‘your happiness or the money?’
Of course he said happiness. Then he got all logical again. ‘But I can’t be happy unless I can pay the mortgage and give my kids the best and have great holidays.’
‘How many hours do you work?’
‘Around fifty.’
‘And how do you feel when you get home?’
‘Tired.’
‘What would your kids prefer, a father who is worn out for forty eight weeks of the year but has four weeks to entertain them per year or a dad who is a real Dad all year round?’
The conversation went on, me questioning, him justifying what he perceived as logic.
Yet it’s not logic, is it? It’s not logic to deny your heart’s desire to change life when it’s hurting you. The mortgage, the kid’s education, the holidays are just stuff. And, like most people find after a heart attack or a divorce or an accident, is that this ‘stuff’ is not that important. What’s important is something else…
Life!
The problem is we got “Conditioned Logic” – “logic” transferred to us by society: friends, family, schools, college, the media, religion etc. We took it
all on and felt we had to behave in a “conditioned” way. The repetition of that conditioning is fine for a while, but when we end up doing something we don’t love, each time we do it takes a little of the soul away. Let me put it another way.
What gives you the power to succeed is what you perceive to be logic. Real power is not necessarily doing what society dictates. Real power is often something else. It is that knowing that comes from nowhere to tell you, you must do something different.
It might seem logical to have the house, the car, the private education, the holiday, but is it powerful. What is powerful is, to say I am not happy and things must change; I’m not killing myself for forty-eight weeks just for four weeks of pleasure; I’m not excited by my work and I’m willing to live in a smaller home if it means I can have more peace, less stress and fall back in love with my partner.
It’s not all about the stuff, is it? It’s about happiness and love; happiness and love of your partner; happiness and love of your children and family; happiness and love of your work. If you have that then you have it all.
Now that’s the power to succeed!
Does your current way of living support that?
Best wishes
Neil
About the Author: Inspiration and thoughts that are often mind-bending can be found at Neil Millar’s website http://www.neilmillar.net you can also sign-up to his Life Purpose newsletter with Unstoppable Life and obtain a copy of one of his books FR>EE.
Source: www.isnare.com
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divorce.co.uk - advice on mediation, counselling and legal aspects ... |
An overview of divorce in the UK, including the law, mediation options and emotional support, from Mills & Reeve. |
www.divorce.co.uk |
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Divorce Magazine, information about separation and divorce |
Divorce Magazine is a compassionate self-help resource for people in need of information about separation and divorce. |
www.divorcemag.com |
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Divorce - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia |
Divorce or dissolution of marriage is the ending of a marriage before the ... A decree of divorce is initially granted 'nisi', i.e. (unless cause is later ... |
en.wikipedia.org |
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DivorceNet - Divorce Net: Family Law Information, Solutions, News ... |
DivorceNet® is the Internet's largest divorce resource, offering state-specific articles, an online community and a nationwide directory of divorce lawyers, ... |
www.divorcenet.com |
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The Divorce Support Page: Divorce, Child Custody, Alimony, Support ... |
a support site for people experiencing, divorce, dissolution, separation, custody, alimony, visitation, etc. Divorce professionals to help you in your area. |
www.divorcesupport.com |
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Divorce Source: a legal resource for divorce, custody, alimony ... |
A state specific divorce web site providing information and referrals for people facing and experiencing issues revolving around divorce, separation, ... |
www.divorcesource.com |
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DivorceInfo Surviving Divorce Managing Lawyers Alimony Child Support |
Divorceinfo -Survive your divorce with some money in your pocket and your dignity intact. |
www.divorceinfo.com |
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Divorce - Wex |
An overview of divorce law with links to key primary and secondary sources, from Cornell University's Legal Information Institute. |
www.law.cornell.edu |
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MedlinePlus: Divorce |
Children; Children and Divorce (American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry) ... Select services and providers for Divorce in your area. ... |
www.nlm.nih.gov |
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Divorce Aid :: Online Guide to UK Divorce Law, Information and Advice |
The largest free online interactive divorce resource in the UK for divorce law, advice, emotional support, counselling, mediation, and website for ... |
www.divorceaid.co.uk |
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Divorce-Online :The UK's leading low cost divorce service |
The largest free online divorce and separation resource in the UK with information, forums, chat, experts and articles. |
www.divorce-online.co.uk |
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How to Divorce As Friends - Featured on Oprah - Bill Ferguson |
Advice, recommended books, and telephone counseling to help couples resolve difficult issues connected with divorce or even save their marriage. |
www.divorceasfriends.com |
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Welcome To Divorce Online ~ www.divorceonline.com |
An electronic journal providing information and referrals for people facing divorce. |
www.divorceonline.com |
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Federal Magistrates Court - On-line Application for Divorce |
In the short-term, please use the Application for Divorce form which can be found at ... Our E-mail address for family law enquiries (including divorce) is ... |
www.divorce.gov.au |
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DivorceCare: Divorce Recovery Support Groups |
DivorceCare is a divorce recovery support group where you can find help and healing for the hurt of separation and divorce. |
www.divorcecare.com |
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Divorce Central Home Page |
Links to divorce-related resources, organized by state, with an archive of articles and interviews. |
www.divorcecentral.com |
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Divorce Helpline — tools to keep you out of court |
Providing information about divorce, and referrals to family law attorneys. |
www.divorcehelp.com |
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Divorce and relationship breakdown : Directgov - Parents |
Advice on counselling, mediation and the divorce process, including where to find a solicitor. |
www.direct.gov.uk |
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Americans for Divorce Reform, Inc. |
John Crouch speaks about divorce law reform and presents a paper by John Crouch and Richard ... To find out how to work on divorce reform in your state ... |
www.divorcereform.org |
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Divorce Busting® - Solve Marriage Problems, Save My Marriage, Save ... |
Divorce is not the answer to marriage problems. Stop your divorce and save your marriage with advice from Michele Weiner-Davis. |
www.divorcebusting.com |
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