|
|
|
Bodily Attributes!
The revolution is indeed underway.
Money married to desire, imagination and necessity has produced a technological revolution which will see incredible changes and potential. This is not about any morbid fixation, but rather about complimentary...
In The Beginning
This is not a history lesson!
In the beginning, humans were free to roam and live as they wished. Of course, there were risks and they had to be very self sufficient. They hunted for their food and for hides and pelts to keep them warm and...
Parents: You Can Do Something About Professional Sports Ethics
Most of us can agree that there is a lack of ethics standards within professional sports today. The fact that many of today's sports heroes are ethical is a stroke of luck. The fact is - many sports superstars are good people, but what about the...
Turf Wars: Author/Landlord Offers a Few Words of Advice for Tenants
Richard Rusdorf, author of "The Landlord's Handbook: A Complete Guide to Managing Small Residential Properties," managed a 400-plus-unit apartment building in Chicago 20 years ago. The past president of the Chicago chapter of the Institute of...
What does Tech have to do with Women's Rights?
"Tech" isn't a four-letter word, but when it comes to "women's
issues" it might as well be. Technology has become a
male-dominated big business; profits have become the priority
over ethics and/or social implications. Women are missing from
the...
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Are Your Children Ready for School?
Spiral bound note book, 3-ring binder, 3-hole lined paper, pencils, pens, erasers, crayons, stapler, scissors, paste, book bag, pencil case, shoes, socks, underwear, shirts, pants, skirts, jacket, uniforms.... Check, Check, Check..., everything is ready. Or is it?
I head a report on the radio yesterday, "School supply sales are down from last year." I am perplexed. What benefit does that fact make in anyone's life? What is the purpose of reporting this? How will that information help me or anyone else? As I mused about this inane topic, I realized the most important information for children returning to school is not reported. The most important information parents and children need when going to school is how to protect children from sexual abuse perpetrators. Every year throughout the world several hundred children are sexually abused (sexually assaulted) by teachers, bus drivers, janitors, or other adults associated with your child's school experience. To adequately prepare your child for school you need to prepare your child to protect him/herself from cunning sexual abuse perpetrators.
How can children protect themselves? First and foremost we need to accept the fact that sexual abuse perpetrators may seem very average and ordinary to the world. In spite of all the reports of sexual abuse by pillars of the community-teachers, clergy, coaches, we still want to cling to the belief that a sexual abuse perpetrator is the disheveled man with a scraggly beard and wearing a dirty trench coat. We find it very difficult to believe the people we like, admire, trust and work with would do such a heinous thing.
The frightening truth about sexual abuse perpetrators is that within their belief system they do not hold beliefs reflecting society's moral and ethical values. Sexual abuse perpetrators frequently pass lie detector tests because their moral and ethical values do not reflect the standards on which the test is based. They feel no inner conflict with what they have done, therefore in their belief system they are not lying when they state, "Never ever. I could never harm a child or anyone. It's not in my heart. That is not who I am." Most perpetrators go to great lengths to present themselves as exemplary people; the teacher, who frequently stays after school to help a child having academic difficulties or the gym teacher/coach, who takes special interest in a budding athlete.
I am not suggesting that everyone who does these things is a sexual abuse perpetrator. Insidiously, perpetrators demonstrate the right, moral, and exemplary behavior to develop credibility and establish proof of their love of children, thus thwarting any suspicion of wrong doing; and to have access to lure the innocent, trusting child. Perpetrators frequently take jobs which afford easy access to children-child care workers, teachers, coaches, etc.
Second, we need to know the definition of sexual abuse.
"Traditionally, incest [sexual abuse] was defined as: sexual intercourse between two persons too closely related to marry legally--sex between siblings, first cousins, the seduction by fathers of their daughters. This dysfunctional blood relationship, however, does not describe what children are experiencing. We need to look beyond the blood bond and include the emotional bond between the victim and his or her perpetrator.
The new definition relies less on the blood bond between the victim and the perpetrator and more on the experience of the child. Incest is both sexual abuse and an abuse of power. It is violence that does not require force. Another is using the victim, treating them in a way that they do not want or in a way that is not appropriate by a person with whom a different relationship is required. It is abuse because it does not take into consideration the needs or wishes of the child; rather, it meets the needs of the other person at the child's expense. If the experience has sexual meaning for another person, in lieu of a nurturing purpose for the benefit of the child, it is abuse. If it is unwanted or inappropriate for her age or the relationship, it is abuse. Incest [sexual abuse] can
occur through words, sounds, or even exposure of the child to sights or acts that are sexual but do not involve her. If she is forced to see what she does not want to see, for instance, by an exhibitionist, it is abuse. If a child is forced into an experience that is sexual in content or overtone that is abuse. As long as the child is induced into sexual activity with someone who is in a position of greater power, whether that power is derived through the perpetrator's age, size, status, or relationship, the act is abusive. A child who cannot refuse, or who believes she or he cannot refuse, is a child who has been violated." -E. Sue Blume, Secret Survivors
Third, a child needs to have specific information, tools and techniques to know what to do. Self-protection offers a direct and effective way for children to help themselves. Who, other than the child, is in a better position to protect him/herself? Perpetrators say they can sense a child to victimize. They can tell by the child's demeanor, body language, and facial expression. They sense the fear, the helplessness, the passivity. They chose a child who is easily intimidated or controlled so hopefully the child won't tell. Secrecy, needless-to-say, is paramount for the perpetrator. Whenever a person is traumatized, he or she resorts to familiar behavior; for girls this behavior is usually passivity, while boys usually 'tough it out;--thinking if they are strong and unemotional, no harm can occur. Sexual crimes against children can only be committed if the perpetrator finds someone who will hopefully keep the secret. No child needs to fall prey to these cunning predators.
There is no foolproof method of preventing perpetrators from abusing a child. They are cunning predators, who have perfected their predatory skills to get what they want. Therefore, you need to heed and investigate any warning signals. Warning signals might be:
·an aversion to a teacher.
·sudden outbursts of anger and there is no apparent reason known for such anger.
·any unusual or unexplained behavior change.
·not wanting to go to school on a particular day of the week-the day gym or music class is held for instance.
·not wanting to ride the bus or be around a particular person.
·the gym teacher says your child is athletically 'gifted' and he or she wants to develop your child's athletic abilities if your child practiced one-on-one after school.
·a teacher gives your child a gift. A gift is sometimes an overture to win your trust and groom your child for seduction.
What to do:
·Teach your child Good/Appropriate Touch.
·Teach your child Appropriate Body Boundaries
·Foster Self-Esteem and Good Body Image
·Teach your child "Tell Mommy and Daddy Everything-No Secrets.
·Allow your child to command respect regarding dislikes and touch with family members, friends or authority figures.
·Talk with and listen to your child until you are satisfied the aversion is unrelated to improper behavior by the teacher.
·Make a habit of coming to school unannounced during the one-on-one practices or other times to become 'known' as an attentive parent.
·Be present at games and practice. If you can't be there, ask another parent to be the 'stand-in' parent. Tell the coach who is 'standing-in.'
·Trust and honor your child's intuitive reactions. If your child feels uncomfortable with someone, respect their intuitive sense.
·Teach your child to avoid going into a teacher's office alone-many children unwittingly go into a teacher's office at the teacher's request to help carry books or equipment-with the door closed and alone with the teacher, the child is abused.
About the Author
Dorothy M. Neddermeyer, PhD, MSW, CSW, CCH, CRT specializes in sexual and physical abuse recovery and prevention. . She is Executive Director of Genesis Consultants, Inc. and 1-800-THERAPIST referral service and www.Gen-Assist.com Her book, "If I'd Only Known...Sexual Abuse in or out of the Family: A Guide to Prevention" is available in ebook or soft cover and can be ordered through http://www.gen-assist.com or any book store.
|
|
|
|
|
| Ethics Updates Home Page. Moral theory; relativism; pluralism ... |
| Designed primarily to be used by ethics instructors and their students to provide updates on current literature, both popular and professional. |
| ethics.sandiego.edu |
|
| Ethics Resource Center: Celebrating 85 Years of Ethics Surveying ... |
| The Ethics Resource Center (ERC) is a non-profit, non-partisan research and survey organization in Washington, DC, dedicated to the study and promotion of ... |
| www.ethics.org |
|
| Ethics - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia |
| One form of applied ethics applies normative ethical theories to specific ... There are several sub-branches of applied ethics examining the ethical ... |
| en.wikipedia.org |
|
| Ethics |
| Quarterly international journal of moral, political, and legal philosophy. Edited by John Deigh, and published by the University of Chicago Press. |
| www.journals.uchicago.edu |
|
| Ethics, Electronic Edition |
| (ET ISSUES AVAILABLE ONLY SINCE VOLUME 112 NO 1). Help with Searching the Ethics Electronic Edition. Help with Access to the Ethics Electronic Edition ... |
| www.journals.uchicago.edu |
|
| Ethics [Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy] |
| Describes the field and its division in metaethics, normative ethics, and applied ethics. By James Fieser. |
| www.iep.utm.edu |
|
| JSTOR: Ethics |
| JSTOR provides a digital archive of the print version of Ethics . ... Founded in 1890, Ethics is an international journal of moral, political, ... |
| www.jstor.org |
|
| Institute for Global Ethics | Home Page |
| An independent, nonprofit, nonsectarian, and nonpartisan organization dedicated to promoting awareness and discussion of global ethics. |
| www.globalethics.org |
|
| Business Ethics |
| Business Ethics Articles from George S. May International Company ... Links to other e-business ethics articles can also be found at this site. ... |
| www.web-miner.com |
|
| The Online Ethics Center for Engineering & Science |
| The Online Ethics Center for Engineering and Science mission is to provide engineers, scientists, and science and engineering students with resources for ... |
| onlineethics.org |
|
| Title Page: Spinoza's Ethics / Elwes Translation |
| Ethics Demonstrated in Geometric Order AND DIVIDED INTO FIVE PARTS, ... This edition of the Ethics utilizes internal hypertext coding to faciilitate the ... |
| www.mtsu.edu |
|
| APA Ethics Office: Ethics Information |
| American Psychological Association sanctioned resources for ethics in psychology, including guidelines for human and animal studies, rules and procedures, ... |
| www.apa.org |
|
| Aristotle's Ethics (Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy) |
| Discussion of Aristotle's ethical views; by Richard Kraut. |
| plato.stanford.edu |
|
| IEEE Code of Ethics |
| Code of ethics for members. |
| www.ieee.org |
|
| st james ethics centre - imagine a more ethical world ... |
| Not-for-profit organisation which provides a non-judgemental forum for the promotion and exploration of ethics. |
| www.ethics.org.au |
|
| Markkula Center for Applied Ethics at Santa Clara University ... |
| The Markkula Center for Applied Ethics at Santa Clara University is one of the preeminent centers for research and dialogue on ethical issues in critical ... |
| www.scu.edu |
|
| Poynter Online - Ethics |
| How Poynter developed ethics guidelines for our own publications. ... In creating online ethics guidelines, Poynter asks for your feedback. By Bob Steele ... |
| www.poynter.org |
|
| ACM: Code of Ethics |
| Code of Ethics and Professional Conduct. |
| www.acm.org |
|
| US Senate Ethics Committee |
| Investigates allegations of misconduct by members, and recommends disciplinary action to the full Senate. |
| ethics.senate.gov |
|
| LegalEthics.com: The Intersection of Ethics and the Law |
| Legalethics.com offers cases, codes, opinions, articles, links, and other reference material relating to ethics and the law. |
| www.legalethics.com |
|
|