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Adultery as Sexual Addiction: Should You Stay Married?
I outline 7 kinds of affairs in my E-book, "Break Free From the Affair." One affair, "I Can't Say NO!" is characterized by addictive tendencies. Infidelity (as well as pornography, strip clubs, online chatting, compulsive masturbation, etc.) may be...
Discovering Infidelity - One Woman’s Story
The day I discovered my husband was cheating on me is forever etched in my mind. I will never forget my bewilderment, shock, confusion and my uncertainty about what to do next. I was totally devastated.
How I Found Out
As a freelance...
Help! My Husband's Buddies Are Butting Into My Marriage
Ask the Marriage Maven: Help! My Husband's Buddies are Butting
into My Marriage
Q. My husband always wants to hang out with his "boys". He used
to hang out with them a lot before we got married, and I thought
that after we got married...
Infidelity Excuse: I fell out of Love...and just love being in love
I find this dilemma rather common for younger couples, probably mid or late 30s and younger.
Usually one reports, “falling out of love” and is truly disturbed by this shift. He/she (and this is not merely a female problem!) wants to “recapture”...
Why Some Marriages Explode And Fall Into Ashes
Just like a fire with smoldering embers can flare up when they are stirred or fanned, emotions can flare up in our marriages if issues are left unresolved to smolder and fester.
Express Anger Respectfully
Many people are uncomfortable with...
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"Divorce Advice: Getting Divorce Advice From the Right Source"
Getting the right type of divorce advice depends on what type of divorce advice you want and what you want to use it for. When looking for divorce advice, it is smart to clearly define what you are seeking the advice for so you can be sure to look in the right places.
Seems simple enough right?
Yes, but...lots of people who are deciding about divorce and seeking divorce advice lump the categories of divorce advice into one, and that's a big mistake. You should seek divorce advice from different types of places for the different types of advice that you need. Certainly there's more types of divorce advice categories, but here's a partial list:
Divorce advice type 1:
Legal advice for getting a divorce when you are sure that you want a divorce, no matter how tough it will be to get that divorce.
When asking for this type of divorce advice while meeting with an attorney, you may be asked if you're certain that you actually do want a divorce…if you do, don't waver, stick to your decision. It makes sense to have a good idea of all of the parts of your life, family and materials, that could be affected or sought after. You want to have your facts, account names, timelines, etc., in mind when meeting with the attorney so that your discussion is maximized.
Divorce advice type 2:
Legal advice for getting a divorce when you are almost sure that you want a divorce, but want to make sure that the financial considerations are in order or that health of your children won't suffer in the long run.
When asking for this type of divorce advice, you may want to consider seeking the advice of an attorney or financial planner for the financial considerations and a counselor experienced in family matters for the impact that a divorce might have on your children. The point is, split the two concerns up so that you get the chance to speak to 2 different people who specialize in each area so that you will get the appropriate divorce advice.
Divorce advice type 3:
Legal advice for getting a divorce in a case that is relatively simple and will be a clean break, no financial or other family considerations to take into account for the divorce.
This is perhaps the easiest type of divorce advice to get because it infers that you have already made the decision from an emotional standpoint and really don't have any other considerations of deep concern. When seeking this type of divorce advice, you most likely have limited financial considerations, a prenuptial agreement, or the situation itself as amenable to everyone and
you just need someone to do the paperwork.
Divorce advice type 4:
Legal and/or counseling advice regarding whether or not divorce is right for you from a psychological, emotional and financial perspective.
When asking for this type of divorce advice, you may want to consider seeking the advice of an attorney or financial planner for the financial considerations and a counselor experienced in Clinical Psychology and "personal-life" coaching for the impact that a divorce might have on you. Again, the point is, split the two concerns up so that you get a chance to speak to 2 different people who specialize in each area so that you will get the appropriate divorce advice.
Divorce advice type 5:
Counseling for emotional support when deciding whether or not you really want a divorce or are just unhappy in your marriage due to a marriage problem.
This type of divorce advice is crucial to your happiness because when you're in an emotional state, it is tough to make lucid and rational decisions. And, if you're wrestling with deciding whether or not to get a divorce (purely from an emotional perspective), you should do all you can to make a logical decision because how you approach this decision and the affects afterwards can be long lasting and far reaching. If you're are struggling with finding divorce advice, you may want to talk to friends, counselors, even other family members.
But, my divorce advice to you is, do it yourself.
I'm not saying don't talk with friends, counselors, and possibly family. What I am suggesting is that you reach the final decision of whether to get a divorce on your own, you have to live with it, no one else. The answer is inside you, you just have to get it out in a logical manner.
Whatever type of divorce advice you need, be sure that you're directing your energies in the right direction. If you don't separate the emotional aspects from the legal aspects of divorce advice, you might end up confused and unable to get the most out of any meeting you may have with an attorney or marriage counselor. At the end of the day, you should control your own destiny and make a smart decision based on logic, controlled emotion, and forward thinking.
© Karl Augustine, 2004
"A Practical Guide To Deciding Whether Or Not To Get A Divorce"
An eBook recommended by marriage counselors and relationship coaches to their clients.
Deciding on Divorce
Divorce Advice
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| Marriage - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia |
| Marriages are generally publicly declared in the context of a wedding ceremony. ... The term wedlock is a synonym for marriage, and is mainly used in the ... |
| en.wikipedia.org |
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| Marriage Builders ® - Successful Marriage Advice |
| Provides answers and insight to questions about infidelity, marriage counseling, and divorce. A free support forum is also available. |
| www.marriagebuilders.com |
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| Christian Marriages - Families Christianity Free Newsletters Sex ... |
| A biweekly newsletter, published by Christianity Today, that provides information and articles of interest for couples. |
| www.christianitytoday.com |
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| Marriage -- THE starting place for exploring marriage |
| Useful links, and weekly feature articles on making your marriage the best it can be. Chat room and bulletin board also onsite. From About.com. |
| marriage.about.com |
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| Marriage - Wex |
| Today the underlying concept that marriage is a legal contract still remains ... Entering into a marriage changes the legal status of both parties and gives ... |
| www.law.cornell.edu |
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| Smart Marriages |
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| www.smartmarriages.com |
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| University of the Family - Marriage Ministries International |
| Marriage is the foundation of the family. When the relationship is hurting, the family is hurting. Couples seek counseling and counseling and are often ... |
| www.marriage.org |
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| USC-MSA Compendium of Muslim Texts |
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| marriage.rutgers.edu |
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| www.wwme.org |
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| Alternatives to Marriage Project |
| Provides support and information to people who choose not to marry, are unable to marry, or are making decisions about marriage. |
| www.unmarried.org |
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| Marriage Equality USA (index.shtml) |
| Group solely committed to securing the right to civil marriage for same-sex couples. Related facts, membership information, and chapters. |
| www.marriageequality.org |
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| President Calls for Constitutional Amendment Protecting Marriage |
| President Bush on Tuesday said, "The amendment should fully protect marriage, while leaving the state legislatures free to make their own choices in ... |
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| Marriage in Ancient Rome |
| Selected information plus a bibliography and internet links. |
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| Instructions to Obtain a Marriage Certificate Copy |
| This page provides instructions for obtaining a certified or uncertified copy of a Wisconsin marriage certificate. |
| www.dhfs.state.wi.us |
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| Judaism 101: Marriage |
| Learn about the Jewish concept of finding your soul mate, Jewish weddings, the process of acquiring a spouse, and the marital relationship. |
| www.jewfaq.org |
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| the marriage toolbox |
| www.marriagetools.com/ - Similar pages |
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| American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy |
| Professionally developed resources for practitioners and consumers of marriage and family therapy. Site also offers a search engine for finding a qualified ... |
| www.aamft.org |
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