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A Call for International Marriage Laws
I recently watched a CNN programme which centred on “kidnapped daughters” (from multicultural marriages) who were unwillingly given away in marriages in Islamic states by their fathers. Usually, the fathers were from these...
Christmas Gifts Can Be a Cheating Husband's Undoing
Have you been plagued by the nagging feeling that your husband might be having an affair? Well. Christmas is probably the ideal time to confirm your suspicions and perhaps find additional proof of your husband’s infidelity, as well.
It’s...
Extramarital Affairs: When Sexual Addiction and Infidelity Meet
One kind of extramarital affair revolves around sexual addiction. The partner involved in the affair, plain and simple, has a difficult time saying "NO." He/she may want to, but feels compelled to say "yes."
People can’t say no? Well, I believe...
Mindfulness and Marriage: Moving Along
Marriage has to be the greatest opportunity for mindfulness on the planet. I used to think that parenting took top honors, but really, a good marriage lasts a lot longer than a good childhood. After all, the kids do move out eventually, but the...
What Is Homeschooling And How Do I know If It's Right For My Family?
Do you know what these famous people have in common? Alexander Graham Bell George Patton Albert Einstein Benjamin Franklin Winston Churchill Agatha Christie George Bernard Shaw Will Rogers If you guessed that they...
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"Divorce Decision: Things To Consider When Making A Decision About Divorce"
When making a divorce decision, there are quite a few things that you should consider. Too often people find themselves unable to clearly identify what they need to think about when making a divorce decision which leads to further indecision and frustration. When making serious divorce decisions, having an open mind and listing the things that will figure into your decision about divorce, will help make the process a little simpler for you.
The things to consider when deciding about divorce varies somewhat from person to person, but here is a list of the most common items to contemplate:
Divorce Decision Item 1: Making sure that you are emotionally ready to go through with a decision.
Not being really ready to decide about whether to get a divorce because of emotional uncertainty will be a serious obstacle if you let your emotions cloud your ability to reason or use logic. People often fear making a tough decision and there are many reasons why people don't ever get around to actually making a divorce decision, which is often one of the toughest decisions to make in life. If you aren't ready to handle the emotional pain of what could be a "life changing" event like deciding about divorce, wait until you can before going through your divorce decision making process.
Divorce Decision Item 2: Making sure that the reasons for divorce that you've listed regarding why you think you want a divorce are indeed valid.
Too often people make the mistake of wanting to get a divorce (or thinking they want to get a divorce) for unviable reasons. This comes from being wrapped up with the idea of being hurt and focusing on one's self rather than separating the actual events from the end results.
Yes, it is very tough to elevate your thinking and be seemingly autonomous to your own situation...in fact, it is often impossible to do. But, if you can look at your situation with someone else in your place, and then go through your divorce decision making process, you'll be closer to the real answer that you want.
Divorce Decision Item 3: Understanding that your sense of self-confidence, ability to be 'self sustaining' with finances or other material things, and desire to 'start over' are all unwavering.
This mix of considerations about divorce can be overpowering for some people when they try to 'break away' or make the decision about getting a divorce. Simply, these 'things to think about' intertwine and affect each other directly. Self-confidence is essential to being able to make a lucid divorce decision, and your level of self-confidence can easily be changed (for better or worse) instantly. If this is the case, you should really re-think whether you're ready to make a divorce decision
and follow through with it.
A lot of time, women in divorce situations have to deal with finance issues and they fear going out on their own because they've had financial support previously. Still, the fear of losing finances or material things is not gender specific by any means...men and women alike need to decide if they are ready to go through financial loss to improve their lives if they feel a divorce will do so. Logic will lead you to the fact that finances shouldn't be the only piece of your divorce decision even though it usually figures in...as to what level finances figure into your divorce decision, will depend on you and what you deem important.
If your overall confidence and desire to start over with your love life support making a change, you're off to a good start in making a smart decision about whether to divorce or not.
Divorce Decision Item 4: Determining who else your divorce decision will affect and how much weight that carries in your decision making formula about divorce.
This item to consider when thinking about divorce is one of the primary things that can lead a person to a decision, one way or another. Even though it can have serious negative repercussions, selfless people will take into account everyone else who will be affected by a serious change like getting a divorce...it is fundamental portion of the overall process of making a smart divorce decision. Children, in-laws, common friends, etc., all will be affected by what you do regarding your action as a result of you truly answering the question, "Should I Get A Divorce?".
When making your decision about staying married or getting divorced, you should look to the future and decide whether your decision will improve or decrease your quality of life and the quality of life of those that will be affected. The number one reason given by people who want to get divorced but don't go through with it, stems from the fear that others will suffer from the divorce. Be very careful when assessing this situation...make sure that you use logic and not emotion when evaluating your thoughts.
Making a divorce decision is a serious and difficult task because it is complex, deeply self-reflective, and frightening due to the length of time it can affect you and others. Make sure that you have your thoughts organized and prioritized and you take your time in making a decision.
© Karl Augustine, 2004
"A Practical Guide To Deciding Whether Or Not To Get A Divorce"
An eBook recommended by marriage counselors and relationship coaches to their clients.
Deciding on Divorce
Divorce Decision
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Marriage - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia |
Marriages are generally publicly declared in the context of a wedding ceremony. ... The term wedlock is a synonym for marriage, and is mainly used in the ... |
en.wikipedia.org |
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Marriage Builders ® - Successful Marriage Advice |
Provides answers and insight to questions about infidelity, marriage counseling, and divorce. A free support forum is also available. |
www.marriagebuilders.com |
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Christian Marriages - Families Christianity Free Newsletters Sex ... |
A biweekly newsletter, published by Christianity Today, that provides information and articles of interest for couples. |
www.christianitytoday.com |
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Marriage -- THE starting place for exploring marriage |
Useful links, and weekly feature articles on making your marriage the best it can be. Chat room and bulletin board also onsite. From About.com. |
marriage.about.com |
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Marriage - Wex |
Today the underlying concept that marriage is a legal contract still remains ... Entering into a marriage changes the legal status of both parties and gives ... |
www.law.cornell.edu |
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Smart Marriages |
Clearinghouse: The latest EASY-TO-USE information to make your marriage or realtionship successful, sexy, and satisfying. |
www.smartmarriages.com |
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University of the Family - Marriage Ministries International |
Marriage is the foundation of the family. When the relationship is hurting, the family is hurting. Couples seek counseling and counseling and are often ... |
www.marriage.org |
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USC-MSA Compendium of Muslim Texts |
Marriage in Islam has aspects of both 'ibadah (worship) of Allah and mu'amalah ... The Prophet considered marriage for a Muslim as half of his religion ... |
www.usc.edu |
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Marriage Records - First Comes Love - Portland, Oregon |
Tonight (Wed Nov 29) Marriage’s own old intern Cole Miller and Glacier Park’s Jessie Slavich are playing at Valentine’s (232 SW Ankeny) downtown at 8pm. ... |
www.marriagerecs.com |
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National Marriage Project Home Page |
Research, education, training and advocacy to strengthen the institution of marriage. |
marriage.rutgers.edu |
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UKBMD - Births, Marriages, Deaths Indexes & Census transcriptions ... |
UK BMD Births, Marriages and Deaths Indexes Online. Baptims, Burials, Monumental Inscriptions, Cemetry, Cemetries, Civil Registration, GRO Indexes, BMD, ... |
www.ukbmd.org.uk |
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Marriage Encounter weekends give married couples the tools to make Good marriages GREAT marriages! Why settle for a ho-hum relationship when you can have a ... |
www.wwme.org |
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Alternatives to Marriage Project |
Provides support and information to people who choose not to marry, are unable to marry, or are making decisions about marriage. |
www.unmarried.org |
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Marriage Equality USA (index.shtml) |
Group solely committed to securing the right to civil marriage for same-sex couples. Related facts, membership information, and chapters. |
www.marriageequality.org |
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President Calls for Constitutional Amendment Protecting Marriage |
President Bush on Tuesday said, "The amendment should fully protect marriage, while leaving the state legislatures free to make their own choices in ... |
www.whitehouse.gov |
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Marriage in Ancient Rome |
Selected information plus a bibliography and internet links. |
www.fortunecity.com |
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Instructions to Obtain a Marriage Certificate Copy |
This page provides instructions for obtaining a certified or uncertified copy of a Wisconsin marriage certificate. |
www.dhfs.state.wi.us |
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Judaism 101: Marriage |
Learn about the Jewish concept of finding your soul mate, Jewish weddings, the process of acquiring a spouse, and the marital relationship. |
www.jewfaq.org |
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the marriage toolbox |
www.marriagetools.com/ - Similar pages |
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American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy |
Professionally developed resources for practitioners and consumers of marriage and family therapy. Site also offers a search engine for finding a qualified ... |
www.aamft.org |
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