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A Promise Ring- More than Just a Pre-Engagement Ring
When one thinks of a promise ring it is common to think of a small, inexpensive ring given to a woman as a promise of marriage in the future; however, this is not always the case. A promise ring has several other purposes besides being a...
How to Decide Whether to Keep Your Marriage or Other Relationship Going or to End It
In their top-selling book "Should You Stay or Should You Go?" Relationship Coaches Susie and Otto Collins offer expert advice to help you decide how to know WHEN or IF it's time to break up, leave your relationship or get a divorce. Theirs is...
June Weddings
From the book Spider’s Big Catch
by Gary E. Anderson
www.abciowa.com
As June wraps its arms around us like the warm hug of a favorite aunt, I begin to think about weddings. I've been a musician for thirty years, and I've played at...
Struggling With Addictions
What kind of bad habits do you struggle with? Most people think that when they come to Christ that their bad habits will magically disappear. And some church people act like if you have any bad habits in your life that you must not truly be...
True Love - Part 1
True Love! We all dream of being in love with that significant other, at some point in our lives. Is it better to have loved once than not to have loved at all? If this is really the case, then how do we actually find true love? How can a man or...
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"Surviving Divorce: What To Think About To Ensure Surviving Divorce"
Surviving divorce can be a valid fear if you're contemplating getting a divorce. In order to ensure surviving divorce, you should first understand that your divorce decision shouldn't be taken lightly. Ensuring that you'll be surviving divorce can be comforting and can influence your path as you consider your reasons for divorce and take the emotional plunge into actually going through with it.
Its tough enough to think about how your immediate life will be impacted by getting a divorce let alone thinking about divorce from an aspect of "the aftermath" of divorce. You may be considering a variety of things in the short term including living arrangements, spouse's schedules, attorneys, kids, property, etc. Its tough to plan so you can really ensure that you'll be surviving divorce once its finally over with.
Surviving divorce, just like deciding to divorce, is about separating emotion from logic and making sure you think about the past, present and future. Of course, how you plan for surviving divorce, will differ from others in some respects, but there are some common themes to think about that should ensure you will be successful surviving divorce.
The most common things to think about when you want to be successful surviving divorce are self-evident and basic, but highly important:
Surviving Divorce Concept 1: Reflect on the past to make sure you can eliminate potential regret.
Make sure that you take the time to reflect on the past and remember the reasons that got you to this state of mind. One thing you absolutely must avoid is going through a divorce and regretting your decision. Evaluate, in detail, your reasons for divorce and confirm to yourself yet again that divorce is the best course of action. This will help eliminate regret...and regret can be a large factor in determining your chance of surviving divorce.
Surviving Divorce Concept 2: Admit to yourself that, no matter how your situation got to this breaking point of wanting divorce, that you had a hand in it, and plan to improve yourself.
Even if you know your present spouse is not a good fit for you, be smart enough to know that you shouldn't waste the opportunity that you have right now to improve yourself, for your own good in the future. At a time like this when emotions are running high, there tends to be a lot of soul searching going on, and that's a good thing if you want to ensure that you've got a solid chance of surviving divorce. Realize that you need to improve for you, this will only help you in the future. Remember, it takes two to tango!
Surviving Divorce Concept 3: Remember that your happiness and plan for surviving divorce should include evaluating and establishing
a certain level of self-confidence.
Having self confidence is absolutely critical to surviving divorce because without it, fear usually will win out and your situation will not improve. Even if you get divorced but you don't evaluate your own level of self confidence in the hopes of improving it, you may be in for a rough time after divorce. If you want a sure-fire way to feel good about surviving divorce, do yourself a favor and get your self-confidence in line.
If your overall confidence and desire to start over with your love life support making a change, you're off to a good start in making a smart decision about whether to divorce or not.
Surviving Divorce Concept 4: Get your finances in a row and understand that your life will change most likely from a monetary perspective.
This is a major portion of the surviving divorce equation, especially for women in divorce. A lot of time, women in divorce situations have to deal with finance issues and they fear going out on their own because they've had financial support previously. Still, this concept is not gender specific and can resonate with anyone because, one some level, your life will change financially as a result of divorce...that's a guarantee. In order to make sure your chance at surviving divorce is high, you need to be willing to trade potential financial loss to get a divorce. If you're willing to do this, maybe you're ready to really take the big step.
Surviving Divorce Concept 5: Understand the true value of using "projection" to ensure surviving divorce.
This is a terrific exercise to go through when you're faced with a divorce decision and want to ensure you've got a great chance of surviving divorce. "Projection" simply means looking to the future and actually imagining what your life will be like once you're divorced. And, if you're smart, you'll see multiple scenarios of what your life will become after divorce and you'll be able to pin down which factors lead to each one of those scenarios. Then, choose the scenario you'd like to actually live, and take the necessary steps needed to implement those factors. This one of the most important practices to ensure that you're chances of surviving divorce are high.
Surviving divorce is a difficult thing but it can easily be accomplished if you plan, reflect, think, and execute based on your own goals and needs.
© Karl Augustine, 2004
"A Practical Guide To Deciding Whether Or Not To Get A Divorce"
An eBook recommended by marriage counselors and relationship coaches to their clients.
Deciding on Divorce
Surviving Divorce
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| Marriage - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia |
| Marriages are generally publicly declared in the context of a wedding ceremony. ... The term wedlock is a synonym for marriage, and is mainly used in the ... |
| en.wikipedia.org |
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| Marriage Builders ® - Successful Marriage Advice |
| Provides answers and insight to questions about infidelity, marriage counseling, and divorce. A free support forum is also available. |
| www.marriagebuilders.com |
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| Christian Marriages - Families Christianity Free Newsletters Sex ... |
| A biweekly newsletter, published by Christianity Today, that provides information and articles of interest for couples. |
| www.christianitytoday.com |
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| Marriage -- THE starting place for exploring marriage |
| Useful links, and weekly feature articles on making your marriage the best it can be. Chat room and bulletin board also onsite. From About.com. |
| marriage.about.com |
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| Marriage - Wex |
| Today the underlying concept that marriage is a legal contract still remains ... Entering into a marriage changes the legal status of both parties and gives ... |
| www.law.cornell.edu |
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| Smart Marriages |
| Clearinghouse: The latest EASY-TO-USE information to make your marriage or realtionship successful, sexy, and satisfying. |
| www.smartmarriages.com |
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| University of the Family - Marriage Ministries International |
| Marriage is the foundation of the family. When the relationship is hurting, the family is hurting. Couples seek counseling and counseling and are often ... |
| www.marriage.org |
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| USC-MSA Compendium of Muslim Texts |
| Marriage in Islam has aspects of both 'ibadah (worship) of Allah and mu'amalah ... The Prophet considered marriage for a Muslim as half of his religion ... |
| www.usc.edu |
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| Marriage Records - First Comes Love - Portland, Oregon |
| Tonight (Wed Nov 29) Marriage’s own old intern Cole Miller and Glacier Park’s Jessie Slavich are playing at Valentine’s (232 SW Ankeny) downtown at 8pm. ... |
| www.marriagerecs.com |
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| National Marriage Project Home Page |
| Research, education, training and advocacy to strengthen the institution of marriage. |
| marriage.rutgers.edu |
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| UKBMD - Births, Marriages, Deaths Indexes & Census transcriptions ... |
| UK BMD Births, Marriages and Deaths Indexes Online. Baptims, Burials, Monumental Inscriptions, Cemetry, Cemetries, Civil Registration, GRO Indexes, BMD, ... |
| www.ukbmd.org.uk |
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| Welcome to Worldwide Marriage Encounter Home Page |
| Marriage Encounter weekends give married couples the tools to make Good marriages GREAT marriages! Why settle for a ho-hum relationship when you can have a ... |
| www.wwme.org |
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| Alternatives to Marriage Project |
| Provides support and information to people who choose not to marry, are unable to marry, or are making decisions about marriage. |
| www.unmarried.org |
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| Marriage Equality USA (index.shtml) |
| Group solely committed to securing the right to civil marriage for same-sex couples. Related facts, membership information, and chapters. |
| www.marriageequality.org |
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| President Calls for Constitutional Amendment Protecting Marriage |
| President Bush on Tuesday said, "The amendment should fully protect marriage, while leaving the state legislatures free to make their own choices in ... |
| www.whitehouse.gov |
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| Marriage in Ancient Rome |
| Selected information plus a bibliography and internet links. |
| www.fortunecity.com |
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| Instructions to Obtain a Marriage Certificate Copy |
| This page provides instructions for obtaining a certified or uncertified copy of a Wisconsin marriage certificate. |
| www.dhfs.state.wi.us |
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| Judaism 101: Marriage |
| Learn about the Jewish concept of finding your soul mate, Jewish weddings, the process of acquiring a spouse, and the marital relationship. |
| www.jewfaq.org |
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| the marriage toolbox |
| www.marriagetools.com/ - Similar pages |
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| American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy |
| Professionally developed resources for practitioners and consumers of marriage and family therapy. Site also offers a search engine for finding a qualified ... |
| www.aamft.org |
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