|
|
|
10 Crucial and Surprising Steps to Build Trust in a Relationship
1. Be predictable. When do seeds of suspicion emerge? When one begins to think, What's up? Why is he doing that? He's never done that before. That is so unlike him. He loses 30 pounds, buys a new wardrobe and comes home late from work. He changes...
A Promise Ring- More than Just a Pre-Engagement Ring
When one thinks of a promise ring it is common to think of a small, inexpensive ring given to a woman as a promise of marriage in the future; however, this is not always the case. A promise ring has several other purposes besides being a...
How to Prepare for Marriage
An Internet Question: WHY ARE THERE SO MANY DIVORCES AND
SEPARATIONS IN THE WORLD TODAY?
1) Corbin says: I believe this is because that most people
really are not prepared for marriage to begin with. Two
suggestions I would make concerning...
IS IT A GOOD IDEA TO ROOM WITH A FRIEND?
On the subject of moving in with a friend, I really don't have much experience. I still live with my folks. The way I see it, why move out when I have free housing and free food here at home? I'm only 18, so I'm still trying to save money. But if I...
Marriage and the Election
Dear Friends of Marriage,
There is a lot of talk on both sides in this election that this is the most important election this century. Most of this is exaggeration to try and motivate people to vote for one candidate or the other. But in one...
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
What is Normal Sexuality in Marriage?
What Is Normal Sexuality in Marriage?
Everyone wonders about this. Do our friends "do it" more often than we do? Does anyone else have this problem in which one partner has high desire, and the other one has little to none? We must be really weird. Everyone wants sex, don't they?
The answer is no. Not really. More than 40 million Americans feel stuck in low-sex or no sex marriages. Research studies tell us that 1 in 3 women and 1 in 7 men reported little to no sexual desire. Sometime in a marriage more than 50% of couples experience one or both partners with little to no sexual desire.
Desire problems are the most frequent complaint of couples entering sex therapy. They are also often the unspoken complaint of couples entering relationship therapy.
In our sex saturated culture, this particular difficulty has a stigma, doesn't it? It's ok to admit to having a drug problem or mood disorder. But a sexual problem? No way! We're all supposed to be sexual superstars in our intimate relationships, aren't we?
Actually, sexual anxieties, inhibitions, and problems are the norm. We're afraid of not doing it "right", like in movies and books. "Right" would be intercourse, with both parties craving each other all the time and having simultaneous orgasms every time they're intimate.
Wrong! Healthy sexuality means giving and receiving touching that is pleasurable. It is not goal oriented, but process oriented. (The journey, not the destination.) It allows both partners to enjoy
pleasure. It varies. Sometimes one or both has an orgasm. Sometimes not. And that's ok. What's not ok is not caring about yours or your partner's needs.
There are many possible reasons for a discrepancy in desire between partners. The first is biological. As I mentioned in the statistics above, more than twice as many women than men have problems with sexual desire. This is because after the infatuation phase of the relationship, when hormones are running rampant, things settle down to natural biological rhythms. And biologically speaking, whoever has the most testosterone has the most desire.
Hmmm…. I wonder which gender that is!
Other reasons relevant to both genders are performance anxiety, emotional pain in the relationship, coerced intimacy, sex used as a bartering tool, lack of time, lack of energy, and fear of intimacy to name a few. These can be helped with an understanding therapist.
What you should do: first get complete medical exams to rule out any type of disease or medication causing the problem.
What you can do: see a relationship expert or sex therapist who can help you experience the pleasure and joy of intimate connection. You deserve no less.
Maggie Vlazny, MSW, LCSW copyright 2005 www.therapyct.com
About the Author
Maggie is an Imago Relationship Therapist and RCI Singles Coach. Services offered by phone, online, or in person at her Fairfield County, CT office. For more information please seee www.therapyct.com or contact maggie@therapyct.com
|
|
|
|
|
| Marriage - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia |
| Marriages are generally publicly declared in the context of a wedding ceremony. ... The term wedlock is a synonym for marriage, and is mainly used in the ... |
| en.wikipedia.org |
|
| Marriage Builders ® - Successful Marriage Advice |
| Provides answers and insight to questions about infidelity, marriage counseling, and divorce. A free support forum is also available. |
| www.marriagebuilders.com |
|
| Christian Marriages - Families Christianity Free Newsletters Sex ... |
| A biweekly newsletter, published by Christianity Today, that provides information and articles of interest for couples. |
| www.christianitytoday.com |
|
| Marriage -- THE starting place for exploring marriage |
| Useful links, and weekly feature articles on making your marriage the best it can be. Chat room and bulletin board also onsite. From About.com. |
| marriage.about.com |
|
| Marriage - Wex |
| Today the underlying concept that marriage is a legal contract still remains ... Entering into a marriage changes the legal status of both parties and gives ... |
| www.law.cornell.edu |
|
| Smart Marriages |
| Clearinghouse: The latest EASY-TO-USE information to make your marriage or realtionship successful, sexy, and satisfying. |
| www.smartmarriages.com |
|
| University of the Family - Marriage Ministries International |
| Marriage is the foundation of the family. When the relationship is hurting, the family is hurting. Couples seek counseling and counseling and are often ... |
| www.marriage.org |
|
| USC-MSA Compendium of Muslim Texts |
| Marriage in Islam has aspects of both 'ibadah (worship) of Allah and mu'amalah ... The Prophet considered marriage for a Muslim as half of his religion ... |
| www.usc.edu |
|
| Marriage Records - First Comes Love - Portland, Oregon |
| Tonight (Wed Nov 29) Marriage’s own old intern Cole Miller and Glacier Park’s Jessie Slavich are playing at Valentine’s (232 SW Ankeny) downtown at 8pm. ... |
| www.marriagerecs.com |
|
| National Marriage Project Home Page |
| Research, education, training and advocacy to strengthen the institution of marriage. |
| marriage.rutgers.edu |
|
| UKBMD - Births, Marriages, Deaths Indexes & Census transcriptions ... |
| UK BMD Births, Marriages and Deaths Indexes Online. Baptims, Burials, Monumental Inscriptions, Cemetry, Cemetries, Civil Registration, GRO Indexes, BMD, ... |
| www.ukbmd.org.uk |
|
| Welcome to Worldwide Marriage Encounter Home Page |
| Marriage Encounter weekends give married couples the tools to make Good marriages GREAT marriages! Why settle for a ho-hum relationship when you can have a ... |
| www.wwme.org |
|
| Alternatives to Marriage Project |
| Provides support and information to people who choose not to marry, are unable to marry, or are making decisions about marriage. |
| www.unmarried.org |
|
| Marriage Equality USA (index.shtml) |
| Group solely committed to securing the right to civil marriage for same-sex couples. Related facts, membership information, and chapters. |
| www.marriageequality.org |
|
| President Calls for Constitutional Amendment Protecting Marriage |
| President Bush on Tuesday said, "The amendment should fully protect marriage, while leaving the state legislatures free to make their own choices in ... |
| www.whitehouse.gov |
|
| Marriage in Ancient Rome |
| Selected information plus a bibliography and internet links. |
| www.fortunecity.com |
|
| Instructions to Obtain a Marriage Certificate Copy |
| This page provides instructions for obtaining a certified or uncertified copy of a Wisconsin marriage certificate. |
| www.dhfs.state.wi.us |
|
| Judaism 101: Marriage |
| Learn about the Jewish concept of finding your soul mate, Jewish weddings, the process of acquiring a spouse, and the marital relationship. |
| www.jewfaq.org |
|
| the marriage toolbox |
| www.marriagetools.com/ - Similar pages |
|
|
| American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy |
| Professionally developed resources for practitioners and consumers of marriage and family therapy. Site also offers a search engine for finding a qualified ... |
| www.aamft.org |
|
|