Search
Related Links

 

 

Informative Articles

Building Your Child's Honest and Fairness
Honesty and Fairness Simply put, honesty means being truthful with ourselves and with others. It means caring enough about others not to mislead them for personal benefit. It means facing up to our mistakes, even when we have to admit them to...

Is My Child Ready For A Family Pet?
At some point every child asks that all time famous question. “Can I have a pet?” While owning a pet fosters responsibility and compassion, some children are just not ready to help take care of a pet. It is a huge responsibility and one that...

Learning Activities For Your Baby
Books and Babies - For babies from age 6 weeks to 1 year Sharing books is a way to have fun with your baby and to start him on the road to becoming a reader. What You Need Cardboard or cloth books with large, simple pictures of things with which...

Teen Advice On-line
There is no doubt about it. We are an electronic society. From our cable television sets to our satellite radios, our cell phones to our beepers, our global positioning devices to our palm pilots, and of course the world wide web – we are a...

What Divorce Parenting Practices is Best Appropriate for Toddlers?
Toddlers, toddlers, toddlers! Very young, seems don't understand what is happening yet their development may be affected by parental divorce. During the first three years of life, children grow quickly and become mobile, learn language, begin to...

 
Parenting Teens - Getting Your Point Across

Giving advice to a teenager is very easy; getting a teenager to take that advice is another matter altogether. It's not only a case of the advice 'falling on deaf ears', sometimes the teenager seems to go deliberately out of their way to do the exact opposite, that's when you know you've got a problem. So how do you go about giving advice to a teen?

The short answer to this question is "don’t". Now at first glance this probably sounds ridiculous, after all parents have more experience of life and most would agree that a parent's job is to pass this experience onto their children. But the problem with giving advice is that it's really just a way of maintaining control. We often cover it up by saying we know what's best in the situation, we have the experience and knowledge, but in reality what we're saying is what we want to happen, this is what we want you to do.

Adolescence is a time for learning to self-manage, to take responsibility for yourself and your actions. It's an essential process if your teen is to become a well-adjusted, fully functioning adult ready for the 21st century. And a fundamental part of the process is handing over control to your teen.

For most parents this is a really scary thought. They're concerned about what will happen if they do, that if they give up some control it will mean they lose all control. They're concerned about what their teen will do or what happens if they get it wrong, in other words they feel a need to protect their teen.

Firstly, handing over control at this stage is more about handing over responsibility and accountability on how to do something, not handing over total control. It's about letting your teen have an involvement in how to solve a particular problem, it's about teaching them problem solving skills. If you always provide the solution how will they ever learn to do it for themselves?

Secondly, your teen is very likely to get it 'wrong', to make mistakes and what is wrong about that? You’re teaching them how to self-correct, just as they did when they first learned to ride a bike and kept falling off. Making mistakes is a natural part of the learning process; more learning comes from making mistakes than comes from getting it 'right'. How much does it really matter if they don’t get it 'right'


first time or choose the 'best' alternative?

Finally, is your solution the 'best'? It's easy to forget that our children are different to us when thinking about a solution to a problem. The solution may be the best one for you, but is it the best one for your teen?

Giving advice by telling teens what to do is only one way of passing on a parent's knowledge, there are other ways of achieving the same outcome and with a higher likelihood of success. And it's how you pass on that experience that makes the difference.

How to Get Your Point Across
  1. Ask before you give. Always ask your teen if they want your advice before you start to give it. If they say, "yes please" then go ahead and have your say, if they say "no" respect their decision and keep quiet.

  2. Question their intent. If your teen has refused advice, ask them specific questions about how they’re going to handle the situation. Asking questions about smaller 'parts' of the problem is a way to at least get your teen to think about what’s involved.

  3. Provide information instead. Directing your teen to a source of information that's neutral allows your teen access to information without having to agree to your point of view.

  4. Give your teen time. Just because your teen hasn't given you an immediate answer to your question doesn't mean they’re ignoring it. Give them time to go away and think about the answers.

  5. Highlight their qualities. Reminding teens of their strengths will focus their minds on choosing options that make the best of them. Focus on their weaknesses and they're likely to lose confidence in doing anything.

  6. Listen to your teen. Often just listening to your teen without interrupting will show you that you don't even need to give advice; your teen already has a solution.

    About the Author

    Carol Shepley has been involved with teenagers for over 10 years and, as the parent of a teen herself, fully understands the pressures placed on parents and teens today. She now shares this knowledge and experience through her website http://www.growingupmatters.com so that parents can help their teens become resilient, resourceful and responsible adults.

 

Pregnancy | Baby | Child | Mom | Advice Tips & Resources for ...
Parenting magazine has everything you need to raise a happy, healthy family. Get expert advice on child development, the best in baby names, our pregnancy ...
www.parenting.com
 
Pregnancy & Parenting: For Today's Mom - iVillage
From trying to conceive through your child's teen years, iVillage Pregnancy & Parenting offers up-to-date and informative articles, features, expert advice ...
parenting.ivillage.com
 
Parenting.org – Help and guidance for parents!
Answers questions about parenting and has resources for better parenting.
www.parenting.org
 
Parents
Expert advice about pregnancy, your kids, your life, and family time from the editors of Parents magazine.
www.parents.com
 
BBC - Parenting
Practical solutions to help with the challenges of everyday parenting - including expert advice as well as tips from other mums and dads.
www.bbc.co.uk
 
Parenting, Pregnancy,Conception, Babynames - Parenthood.com
Information regarding parenthood and parenting. Find the meanings of Baby names and useful articles on parenting.
www.parenthood.com
 
Parenting advice, child development and family reference at ...
FamilyEducation.com provides parents with educational printables, games, activities, parenting ideas, tips, family advice, and information on learning ...
www.familyeducation.com
 
MedlinePlus: Parenting
From the National Institutes of Health; Adventures in Parenting (National Institute of Child Health and Human Development) ...
www.nlm.nih.gov
 
The National Parenting Center
Support site for parenting. Dedicated to providing parents with comprehensive and responsible guidance from the world's most renowned child-rearing ...
www.tnpc.com
 
About - Parenting & Family
Parenting advice from moms and dads who know what's up. Whether your babies are still actual infants, or about to enter college, our Guides will give you ...
about.com
 
Positive Parenting - Main Menu
Debbie Critzer Positive Parenting is dedicated to providing resources and info rmation ... Welcome to Positive Parenting online! For our long-time readers, ...
www.positiveparenting.com
 
Parenting Tips and Information on Baby Care and Pregnancy.
This parenting and baby care resource center offers essential pregnancy, baby care and development information, tips, and articles.
www.parenttime.com
 
Parenting, Children's Health and Education, Family Crafts and ...
Parenting, Children, and Families - ParentCenter is the most trusted online resource for parents of young kids. ParentCenter offers free weekly newsletters, ...
parentcenter.babycenter.com
 
Parenting - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The term "child training" implies a specific type of parenting that focuses on ... Parenting measures can also be observational, such as the Parent-Child ...
en.wikipedia.org
 
Today's Parent
At Todaysparent.com you'll find a parenting community to call your own, with a library of information on all the ages and stages of your growing family, ...
www.todaysparent.com
 
Indian Parenting - The Definitive Guide
Comprehensive website for Indian parents with topics ranging from pregnancy to raising children, including articles on infertility, health and medicine, ...
www.indiaparenting.com
 
Exceptional Parent Magazine - Eparent.com - parenting those with ...
Magazine for parents of children or young adults with disabilities. Includes reports, forum, products links, books.
www.eparent.com
 
Parenting: information, advice and support from toddler to teenage
Parenting advice, information and support to help you with your family, from toddler to teens.
www.ivillage.co.uk
 
Parenting-QA.com - Parenting Questions and Answers For Parents in ...
All parents have questions about their children’s behavior, growth, and development. The challenges of parenting seem never-ending and constantly evolving.
www.parenting-qa.com
 
Parenting Teens - Troubled Teen Help Information.
Information for parents of teens, including troubled teens, parenting tips, teen education, and more.
www.parentingteens.com
 
 

 

Content Menu
  • 100 ways to connect with your teen

  • 10 outcomes you will love before potty training

  • 10 simple ways to say i love you

  • 10 things you can do to help a shy child

  • 10 ways to make toilet training fun exciting

  • 15 ways to create some extra holiday money

  • 3 major divorce parenting mistakes and learn how to avoid them

  • 5 steps to stress guard your family

  • 5 tips for successful grandparenting

  • 8 gifts of parenting

  • 8 steps to financially intelligent parenting

  • action points for effective grandparents

  • add adhd children being your childs best friend

  • andy griffith show family lessons

  • and this unto you

  • an examined life

  • an ntertaining evening

  • are we there yet

  • are your children growing up too fast

  • are your kids driving you crazy how character building charts keep you sane

  • are you addicted to your children

  • are you letting your children manipulate you

  • are you making time for your marriage

  • are you meeting all your childs basic needs

  • are you placing your children in danger

  • are you present with your children

  • aromatherapy for the parents of teenagers

  • authoritarian parenting permissive parenting or loving parenting

  • author interview mommy come home

  • a daddy baby shower new twist on the old baby shower

  • a harvest halloween

  • a history of names

  • a little girl with a big question

  • a minute can turn into hours for the child of a work at home mom

  • a season for giving

  • a servants heart

  • baby lullaby

  • baby name trends from classic to hip

  • baby safety checklist protecting your baby

  • baby shower gift ideas

  • backpacks and bullies is your child prepared

  • back to school advice

  • back to school time to recharge

  • bath time fun

  • bedtime without battles

  • behavioral strategy avoid the grey areas and deal only with black white

  • better aging

  • beyond the words a childs voice

  • be a good role model

  • birth of a baby birth of a parent

  • bless the children

  • born with instructions

  • boy do we get the garbage

  • breastfeeding 101 nursing basics for new moms

  • breastfeeding handling criticism

  • building your childs honest and fairness

  • build character now practical tools for busy parents

  • build your childs strong character through responsibility

  • bullies

  • calling forth a soulmate

  • caretaking parents entitled kids

  • childhood friendships

  • childrens allowance

  • childrens discipline how to resolve divorce parenting differences

  • childrens sexuality

  • children and divorce

  • children are people not machines

  • children patriots

  • children s discipline how to resolve divorce parenting differences

  • children who talk to angels

  • clean your house in half the time

  • committed parenting

  • convicting children

  • creative soap crafts

  • cut the costs of your new baby devour those yard sales

  • cyber parenting 101

  • dads are heroes

  • developing citizenship and patriotism in your child

  • developing your babys language

  • developing your childs compassion

  • developing your childs self discipline

  • developing your childs self respect

  • develop your childs critical thinking skills

  • develop your childs self confidence

  • diaper bags for dads papas got a brand new bag

  • difference

  • divorced parent do you alienate your child from the other parent

  • does your child need a bedtime routine yes

  • dont make these 6 mistakes when your child is having nightmares

  • do you want your children to be like you

  • eggs travagant eggs

  • elephants and teenagers

  • ericksons theory of human development

  • essential tips for the kitchen

  • every mom worries

  • family as as entity

  • family time

  • farm to market days

  • febrile seizures

  • first time parenting woes

  • five solid reasons why your child can be an achiever

  • five tips for successful grandparenting

  • five ways to turbo boost your parenting skills

  • fraternal twin parenting concerns

  • free african games

  • free baby shower games

  • free empowered kids game room

  • free kwanzaa games

  • frequently asked questions about reading to your child

  • fresh fun music for the whole family

  • friends are a gift you give yourself

  • friends fish the future

  • fun easy ways to help your family set goals for the new year

  • gaining a childs trust

  • getting great pictures of the kids this halloween

  • getting what you want in parenting

  • getting your husband involved in caring for your baby

  • gifted children

  • give your child the gift of self esteem

  • giving the gift of mama

  • glowing goblins

  • god dont like rich people

  • grace full parenting committing to nurturing the souls of our children

  • grandparenting ceremony

  • grieving children

  • growing pains

  • guerilla parenting techniques what are they

  • guilt free parenting

  • head lice

  • helping children with learning problem

  • helping your children develop their self discipline

  • helping your child develop

  • help my preteen teenager is driving me nuts

  • help your baby develop character

  • his toy her toy

  • holiday expectations

  • homework help for the attention deficit child

  • home and school education your kids can benefit from both

  • how can i teach my toddler to share

  • how develop your childs good judgement

  • how do you find the best car seat to protect your child

  • how is peaceful parentinge different

  • how the challenge of single parenting affects your decision to divorce

  • how to add romance to your relationship

  • how to choose a diaper bag

  • how to choose a diaper pail for disposable diapers

  • how to create an emotional bond with your child

  • how to help your child with first day anxiety

  • how to live with your teenagers untidy room

  • how to look for baby books

  • how to make coupons cash not clutter

  • how to make your own baby food and save a fortune

  • how to organize christmas toy shopping

  • how to potty train in two days

  • how to raise creative kids

  • how to reorganize your divorce life for happiness

  • how to share parenting responsibilities

  • how to share parenting responsibilities with your husband or partner

  • how to stop divorce parental conflict from bursting

  • how to take charge of the tv

  • how to while away a winter sunday afternoon with the kids teach a little eq at the same time

  • how well do you know your child

  • hunter and gatherer

  • if i hurt you then im sorry

  • impact of excercise and medical care on early learning

  • imperfect parenting

  • index

  • infant circumcision

  • insanity a symptom of a new parent

  • intersting baby facts strange but true

  • interview with a coach who helps men become better fathers

  • in search of elmo

  • is it okay to spoil your kids

  • is mothering wearing you out

  • is my child ready for a family pet

  • is this the one

  • is your child having trouble in school

  • its ok for your child to be bored in fact its recommended

  • jackass stunts high school hazing and herd mentality how can parents of teenagers protect kids from doing stupid things

  • jesus birthday sacred children series 2 of 3

  • john wayne vs petticoat approach to parenting

  • john wayne vs the petticoat approach to parenting

  • keeping abreast

  • keeping the stress out of single parenting

  • kids channeling mania towards productivity

  • learning activities for your baby

  • learning disabilities

  • lets go shopping at yard sales

  • living in love remembering why you married

  • living with and loving our teens

  • love at home

  • love food and kids

  • make role modeling a hobby

  • making mom feel special

  • making time for your kids

  • marriages may end but families are forever

  • maturing as a parent

  • meal deal how you and your toddler can enjoy eating out

  • mindfulness and marriage moving along

  • missing child

  • mommy baby more parenting tidbits

  • mommy baby parenting tidbits

  • mommy baby styles of parenting

  • moms 5 stteps to organize kids toys

  • moms 7 tips to organize your school kids

  • moms get more energy now

  • mom vs dad navigating parenting differences with all good intentions

  • moral armors irrational parenting part i

  • moral armors irrational parenting part ii

  • moral armors irrational parenting part iii

  • moral armors irrational parenting part iv

  • moral armors irrational parenting part v

  • more than i can bear

  • more than mom and dad

  • motivation the key to your childs educational success

  • my husband prioritizes making money above family time

  • my sons teacher was a bully

  • natural disasters help your child cope with the anxiety

  • need a great family or on your own winter activity

  • never pay full price for a book

  • no invitation needed sacred children series 3 of 3

  • number 1 key to good parenting

  • obesity isnt the only problem with todays youth entertainment

  • oh baby choosing the right baby name

  • oops did i forget the free fun

  • over indulgence and over attentiveness two dangers parents must avoid

  • parental hostility what will this bring to your childrens life

  • parenting

  • parenting activity use these 3 time out twists

  • parenting adolescents young adults

  • parenting advice when your kids fight

  • parenting after divorce

  • parenting balancing control and freedom

  • parenting confidence who needs it

  • parenting dilemmas finding support online

  • parenting failure it may not be all it seems

  • parenting give your child the tools to build strong character and values

  • parenting how to help your firstborn become friends with the new baby

  • parenting how to set limits for young children

  • parenting is tough make it easy

  • parenting just right the number one secret

  • parenting manual

  • parenting predicaments

  • parenting resolutions for character builders the best three ever

  • parenting roots and wings

  • parenting rules for permissive parents use these with caution

  • parenting secrets revealed

  • parenting skills five ways to turbo boost your confidence

  • parenting starts before pregnancy

  • parenting strategies to get your baby to sleep

  • parenting strategy one of the worst ever

  • parenting styles overcoming your differences

  • parenting style one of the worst ever

  • parenting success

  • parenting teenagers

  • parenting teens getting your point across

  • parenting teens the future

  • parenting ten things you can do to develop your babys language skills

  • parenting the irrational vocation

  • parenting troubled teens

  • parenting univeristy potty training 101

  • parenting yourself when you have small children

  • parents dealing with worry and fear

  • parents teach thought stopping fix crooked thinking caps

  • parents what kind of role model are you

  • passions search for destiny

  • pay attention its your most important job

  • pen pal romance

  • pet loss can be just as devastating

  • postpartum depression

  • potty training to train or not to train

  • practicing bringing generations together

  • preventing obesity in young children

  • project glowing goblins

  • protecting your childs innocence

  • putting your child to bed

  • rainy day fun crafts for kids

  • rainy day fun for kids

  • raise awesome kids this 4 point plan gets results

  • raising creative grandchildren

  • read together with your baby

  • real friends

  • real monsters under your bed

  • reincarnation sacred children series 1 of 3

  • remember the generation gap

  • reshape the family diet avoid dinnertime trouble cyndi thomas nd

  • resource for parents and teachers dealing with bullying

  • responsible fatherhood a unique and irreplaceable role

  • rotator

  • running away

  • safety measures to be taken when buying childrens clothing

  • saving memories of your children

  • saying yes so they wont know its no guiding behavior for peaceful parenting

  • saying yes so they wont know its no guiding behavior peaceful parenting

  • saying yes so they won t know it s no guiding behavior for peaceful parenting

  • scorpios child

  • secrets to working and pumping

  • secrets your husband significant other dont want you to know

  • security items

  • send your child to college free

  • share your thoughts about parenting

  • sharing parenting responsibilities

  • should you forgive infidelity

  • show your baby that you read

  • sibling rivalry the magic secret that stops it instantly

  • signs of teething baby

  • sign up for your child

  • single parenting how the challenge of single parenting affects your decision to divorce

  • sissys show of support

  • sit right here is a new game

  • slash your grocery prices with coupons

  • social and emotional preparation for pre school

  • son can i use the car tonight

  • spanking children

  • spare the child ditch the rod

  • spare your kids to 7 most distressful divorce parenting situations

  • speaking on behalf of our children stop blaming the victims

  • speaking with our children about the death of pope john paul ii

  • speech impediments

  • spend more time with your family this holiday season host a caroling party

  • start growing healthy children before getting pregnant

  • step parenting power tool using family rituals and traditions to create identit

  • stop look listen steps to better parenting communication

  • stop lying now

  • stop shoulding on yourself parenting without resentment

  • study skills how can you help your kids

  • teaching children good manners

  • teaching your child courage

  • teaching your child to be respectful

  • teach me im yours if you want your child to be smart you be the first teacher

  • teach your baby to read english

  • teach your childs honesty and fairness

  • teen advice on line

  • teething symptoms and how to treat them

  • ten tips for parenting teens

  • ten tips to help you save your sanity during the holidays

  • ten ways to save your sanity during the holidays

  • the 5 bs of effective parenting

  • the absentee parent parenting from a distance

  • the benefits of baby massage

  • the b word

  • the challenges of single parenting

  • the courage to be a loving parent

  • the essence of infidelity

  • the family bed a story in generations

  • the five best gifts to give your family

  • the gratitude wreath

  • the high eq way to choose the right man for you

  • the importance of fathers

  • the importance of hobbies

  • the importance of mothers

  • the john wayne vs apron string approach to parenting

  • the last day of who cares

  • the official parenting cheesecake recipe

  • the parent teen relationship

  • the seven keys to child obedience

  • the shoemaker and the brat

  • the sound of his laughter

  • the spirit of fathers day

  • the theory of parentivity and other equations

  • the top 5 reasons why unwed parents must establish paternity

  • the truth about early pregnancy tests

  • the woes of coparenting

  • think green

  • think like your kids and understand them more

  • time management and how it affects your kids

  • time management for stay at home parents

  • tips and tricks for introducing solids to your baby

  • toddler skills for personal responsibility

  • tools for parenting anger management for families part 1

  • tools for parenting anger management for families part 2

  • tools for parenting my child the lawyer

  • too many divorces

  • top 10 items for successful breastfeeding

  • top ten common sense rules for fathers

  • to know you is to love you

  • trick or treating safety

  • triumphing over tantrums

  • two year olds the original freedom fighters

  • typical language accomplishments

  • up to your neck in parenting dogma doo step into something more personally correct 7 warning signs that big mother is watching

  • using music to calm your baby

  • valentines day snowflake contest

  • valentine moments with your children

  • validating vs indulging childrens feelings

  • visiting the library

  • want to be a better parent

  • watch your child progress

  • what 10 things divorced parent should do to promote positive child adjustment

  • what 3 greatest gift you can give to your children by co parenting

  • what divorce parenting practices is best appropriate for an infant

  • what divorce parenting practices is best appropriate for preschoolers

  • what divorce parenting practices is best appropriate for school age children

  • what divorce parenting practices is best appropriate for toddlers

  • what is good parenting

  • what julia roberts has to say about motherhood

  • what not to give for mothers day

  • what parents should do for children to do their best after divorce

  • what the matter is

  • what to look for when choosing baby furniture

  • what we teach our children

  • what you can learn about life from your child

  • what you can learn about life from your children

  • what you should know about scholarships

  • when children are asking for love

  • when parents disagree

  • when time out dont work

  • when your baby arrives

  • where do your priorities fit

  • white noise for baby stops colic crying fast

  • whole brained grandparenting the baby gift

  • who are your kids talking to online

  • who will be their guardian

  • why kids toys are for kids

  • why other children are rejecting your child

  • will the angels abandon us

  • words of wisdom for single parents

  • writers block

  • youre a mom shes a mom being an adult with your parents

  • your babys colic

  • your childs most basic needs

  • your job as a role model

  • your kids career whose choice

  • you make me sick and other things parents say in anger

  • you want to be a stay at home parent

  • you want whaaat