Slow down, it is tiime that you started learning to take one step at a time! Remembering the wisdom of our elders, anything worth doing is worth doing well, why then do we try to leap to the end of projects and events?
Gone are the simpler and kinder days of old, when parents and children made time to sit down to dinner as members of a family. The dinner table being the forum for many interesting conversations; often involving the experiences of the breadwinner’s days but also lined with pearls from the children whom shared their experiences with enthusiasm.

Now it is time to pull out one more memory; the days of summer that lasted forever, wherein games, laughter and food were common place. Perhaps you remember playing catch with a brother, sister or parent; maybe it was a game of tag or a rousing game of ‘duck, duck, goose’. Those days have long since been abandoned by people who are so busy with their activities, meetings and their children’s schedules that they have to carry around a day timer instead of a bottle of cherry coke.

It seems all so simple, we tell our children to slow down and take one step at a time, but we show our children how busy we are; constantly trying to keep up with the hectic pace that we have accepted as the normal way to live life. The example that we set is more powerful in influencing our children than simple words.

How can we possibly hope to get our children to understand what it used to be like? None of us have to the time to sit down with them and play the games we once liked as children. Instead, children must compete with a complex and unending number of interruptions, which results in a sense of confusion.

Now they are witnesses to extremely busy parents, who always seem to be pressed for time. “Show daddy that later, sweetheart” or “maybe later honey, mommy is just too tired”. The message is the same regardless of the words used; children are becoming just another appointment to schedule into the parents’ days.

New parents try to have patience with their babies and toddlers, but often the patience and coaxing is replaced with frustration at the infant’s inability to perform the chosen task within the time frame the parent expected it to happen. This remains true throughout the lifetime of the child; they become victims to deadlines and must be cognizant of all deadlines in order to please their parents, teachers and friends.

In the busy life of the 21st Century many people have forgotten the basic graces of life and have opted for the fast paced never-ending race. It is not a conscious choice so much as finding we are ploughing ahead without remembering to stop and provide the most basic of human needs.

How can we possibly raise our children to understand that it is okay to take just one step at a time? A new mother, anxious to see her child walk or crawl, gives an unending stream of encouragement to get the child to achieve the milestone within the time frame that the mother has to watch the child.

Forgetting that children need to learn things by self-discovery, adults often find themselves becoming impatient with the children; willing them to ‘hurry up already’. Why are we in such a hurry all the time? Frustration and anger often overrules the patience we wish to display to our children. How ironic that the children are forced to interpret different verbal signals and body language. The mixed messages that the children receive provide the

Have you ever watched a baby bird learning to fly in the presence of a strong wind? The bird tries to fight against the wind and quickly tires out. The bird will only try to fight the wind for a limited amount of time and energy before discovering that going with the flow of the wind is more comfortable. Our children are much like these little birds, with perseverance our children can and will become contributing members of society.

Listen Up!

For most of the population, we have grown to believe that 18 hours of the day must be spent doing something productive; whether it be work, gardening, sports or playing computer games, we expect our bodies and minds to be able to run a race that can never be won.

What will it take to get people to slow down and witness life before it passes them by? The answer is not always a pleasant one; most frequently it is a major illness or tragedy that brings us to our knees and to our senses. The people who get a warning through health issues are often so concerned with ‘making the most of their time’ that they actually miss the very wonders of life.

How many times have you felt like you have been pounding your head into the wall, waiting and willing something to happen? Does life seem to pass you by while you are too busy doing the mundane everyday tasks that have become an important part of your daily routine?

Well, it is time to stop and think! If you haven’t been outside today open the window or step outside onto the front steps; take a deep breath and let it out slowly. Try to do this more than once within your day; the benefits are unmatched by any other task that takes only seconds of your precious time.

If you are at work and are unable to go outside during the day, take a moment to stand up and walk away from your desk. Take a deep breath and stretch the muscles in you arms, neck and back – chances are that you have no idea just how much pressure you have placed upon your body by sitting at the desk and doing paperwork or typing reports. Each muscle has a memory of how to feel good, but often these memories have been rewritten by forcing them to remain in unnatural positions for long periods of time.

If you saw a child doing something so repetitive that it would be harmful wouldn’t you stop that child? The answer, more likely or not, is that we want to have our children experience the good things in life without any of the pain.

Why do you allow yourself to set the exact opposite example by doing things that are harmful to your health and wellness? Sending mixed messages to our children will not help them escape the dreaded treadmill that we have been running on for most of our adult lives. It is time to stop and take one step at a time.

It won’t be easy, but remember learning how to live in the moment requires ‘learning to take one step at a time’. Don’t you owe it to yourself and to your children?

About the Author

Susan Eskdale, the President of S.E.A. Consulting, is a freelance writer, professional editor and a web designer. This former educator has rediscovered her passion for writing and enjoys contributing fiction, non-fiction and poetry for a variety of online publications.