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10 Steps to Happily Ever After
Do you know what all happy and healthy marriages have in common? In every one of them you will find two people committed to making each other happy. You will find a man who cherishes his wife and puts her needs above his own, and you will find a...
Eclectic Paths to Integration Series – Psychological Models - Freud
Part three in a series of articles discusiing integrative maodels and proceedures. This section deals with Sigmund Freud's Psychoanalytic Theory The Psychoanalytic schools of the twentieth century attempted to bring the psyche under the...
Emotional Freedom - At YOUR Fingertips!
What would you say if I told you I know of a simple method that can make emotional stress such as upset, anger, fear, concern and distress simply melt away in a few minutes and all you had to do to achieve this is simply touch a few "magical...
Labeling is Disabling: Achieving Congruent Communication
A small town, somewhere in the world, was managed by a town council of seven or eight members. The council normally met once a week. One member - let's call him Bill - would invariably stroll into the council chamber exactly ten minutes after...
Put Yourself Out of Your Misery and Quit
It happens. You hate your boss, but you love your job. Or you love your boss, but hate your job. Or you’ve seen a colleague in that position, or you have a client so encumbered. I’ve seen it play itself out in more than one work situation. In...
 
Ways Father's can Invest in Their Children


One of the primary negative impacts on children is the lack of a consistent, nurturing father or father-figure. One of the primary predictors of future violent behavior in boys is how much neglect they perceive from their father. It’s not enough for “dad” to go to work, come home, read the paper, watch ESPN and then go to bed. That’s being a roommate not a dad.
Children need to perceive active investment from fathers. We’ve defined a good dad as the man who works consistently, brings home the paycheck, and doesn’t openly abuse his children and family. I think it’s time to expect more out of fathers. Here’s some suggestions.
1) Mentor Humility: Fathers can have a powerful impact on their children if they are willing to actively mentor humility. Showing children it’s ok to admit when they are wrong and placing others before one’s self are powerful investments.
2) Invest Time: Set aside time for your children on a regular, frequent basis. This time is for the kids. It allows them to bond with dad and each other in a familial, empowering way. This develops family coherence, problem solving development, and can be used to develop ethics and values.
3) Have bedtime with your children: Fathers should set aside bedtime as very


specific time to spend with each of the children. This is a time to reflect on the day, a time to establish calm communication with the children.

Children require a sense of safety and security. Bedtime can be used to create a quiet atmosphere that encourages your children to share and allows them to see that you are there for them when the world is dark and unsure.
Finally, both mom and dad should participate in bedtime. If children can fall asleep feeling safe, and secure they will experience a higher quality of sleep leading to improved, positive behavior. They will trust their parents more, leading to an increase in communication.
Fatherhood is no longer about procreation leading to paycheck contribution. It is investment leading to excellence. Fathers need to be as involved or more involved than mothers in the raising of children.

Darrin F. Coe, MA is the father of two very active pre-schoolers and a mental health professional

Darrin F. Coe, MA
1019 Clover
Canon City, CO 81212
719-275-5907
coe@ris.net

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Darrin F. Coe holds a master's degree in professional psychology and is the father of two preschool boys. contact at http://dcoe1.tripod.com

 

Encyclopedia of Psychology - Psychology Websites
A hierarchical database of links to psychology resources.
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