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Are You A Juicy Woman: 10 Juicy Morsels to Getting Healthy
By taking steps to get healthier and become more active, you are
definitely in the Juicy circle. Girl, you are so savvy realizing
the importance of caring for yourself. You know that without
taking care of yourself you won't have the energy to...
Married 4 Good Thinking
Although I do believe in "till death do us part", the M4G concept is not so much about permanency as it is about making great things come out of your marriage. I have a challenge for you: write 10 good things that you'd like to see come from your...
Online Dating 101 - The Basics
nline Dating 101 by Kevin Koger Feeling like there’s something that’s just not quite there yet in how you’re going about this whole online dating thing? Don’t feel bad, chances are you’re one of the many people who’re still pretty new to this gig....
Preparing Your Child to Move
Children respond to the general atmosphere set in the home by the attitudes of their parents. If you look at moving as an exciting adventure full of new possibilities, then chances are very good that you will infect your children with enthusiasm and...
Quick Fixes: Happiness in a Bottle
This is the age of the Quick Fix - the magic bullets that claim to take away our sorrows, our tiredness, our sadness.
You need look no farther than your mailbox to see the range of remedies - prescription drugs and supplements - being plugged...
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Which Came First, Love or Marriage?
I came across an article today: LOVE AND MARRIAGE THE TORAH'S CRITERIA by Rivka Olenick.
It helped me think about my own marriage, and the way that many couples approach the idea of being together before they get married vs. what they think after the wedding. People often believe they know what love is after seeing a limited view of their spouse-to-be.
When they're asked, “why do you guys want to get married?” They say, "I just love the way he [fill in the blank]." or "She and I have so much in common".
But when a real test comes, like always having to pick her socks or dealing with his less than average meals (sic), both parties become greatly disenchanted. After they have the opportunity to discover more about the other person, the "love" fades and resentment moves in.
So what does it take to make it work? Of the happy couples I’ve talked with, most attribute their happiness to the real love that grows after marriage. Often times it’s not a pretty love. Partners may have to get dirty, like gardeners who expect good things to grow after they've done the work and have overcome their selfishness.
This kind of love grows when they lose a loved one but can find comfort from God and each other during their grief. It’s the kind of love that develops when they are in danger of losing their house or job, but can see beyond their circumstances. Or it’s the kind that matures when they’re able to overcome adultery and find forgiveness not only heals, but seals their bond to
one another.
This love is not an overnight love. It doesn’t come quick, and it is a challenge for our microwave society. But these couples keep pressing on, believing that happiness can be achieved. Fortunately, for most persevering couples, it is.
For all those people out there who are engaged or thinking about marriage, my suggestion to you? Find one of these couples who can be trusted. Model them and let them mentor you. If you don’t know someone personally, email couples@marriagementors.org to find out how to get help with your relationship.
Finally, I'd like to leave you with this thought from the article I read:
"...marriages are contracted not as a result of passion and romance, but as a result of good judgment and sound reason. If the couple is well suited, the marriage will result in love and happiness. Marriages based on pre-marital infatuation, however, all too often fail the test of married life."
Keep your faith during the hard times. Keep your head when you want to lose it. And your heart will believe in a love greater than you can imagine.
About the Author
Keishia Lee-Louis is the Editor/Publisher of http://www.Married4Good.com (November 2005). Her work has appeared on iVillage.com, BibleResourceCenter.com, and in many other publications.
Currently, she's writing a book on marriage, which will be published in 2006. If you'd like to see more of her work, visit http://married4good.blogspot.com
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