“The stress-free way to enjoy the holidays is to plan, take one step at a time, and have a sense of humor.” Beth Tabak

Can you feel the holiday jitters beginning? Suddenly there it is right around the corner. Well relax. Take the time to plan well right now and ease on into the holidays with a big smile on your face. Get out a small, convenient notebook. Let’s get started on the 10 Steps to a Stress-Free Holiday.

1- Reminisce over previous holidays. In your notebook create a column for What Works and another for Not This Again. Under What Works list the activities that bring you joy, activities that seem to come naturally to you from your heart, and those things that just seem to click into place. Under Not This Again list your challenges. Jot down the things that drain your energy and put you in a bad mood. Keep in mind that you can not change other people. What can you do to delegate, dump, or change those items in the Not This Again column and add to or just embrace those things in the What Works column? What changes need to take place?

2- Choose a theme for the holidays that you can get excited about. What is most important to you during this holiday? Base your theme around that. Maybe you want to stay home. Your theme could be “Home for the Holidays”. Maybe you are short on cash like so many others are this year. Your theme could be “Simply Sensational”. I recently organized a coaching group with the theme “All Done by December 1.” You can choose a theme that honors your faith or choose a quote such as this one from Mahatma Gandhi “Be the Change You Wish to See in the World”. Have fun with this and get creative!

3- Set your top 3 priorities based on your theme and what you want. Be crystal clear about your priorities. Know what is most important to you. When you know your priorities you are able to say yes or no more easily to a request. When you know what is important to you it becomes easier to set boundaries. When someone asks you to participate in a project or activity look at your top 3 priorities and see if it serves them. If it does, then it is worth consideration. If it does not, then the answer is no.

4- Create your Map. Would you take a long trip without planning? Would you begin a large project without planning? So it makes sense for us to do some planning at the holidays when so many areas of our life are effected: time, energy, personal care, relationships, physical environment, and finances. Create a task list from now through the end of the year. Sounds tedious? Yes it takes a block of time to complete and will save you time and stress. It will prevent you from running around in circles, going back and forth to the same place, and trying to remember what’s next. Last year I had about 200 items on my task list. Do you think you can operate most efficiently by keeping these things in your mind? On your word processor use the spreadsheet option to create a chart with 4 columns (e-mail me for a copy of the Task List I use). Use your theme for your header. Under the header list your top priorities. Label the 4 columns in a way that is most helpful to you. I use Business To Do’s, Personal To Do’s, Holiday To Do’s, and Need List. Set up your page with a 10pt. font and minimal margin space so you can fit as many rows as possible. List your tasks and continue to add as they come to you. This is the most tedious portion of the planning process, and probably the most important. Keep this with you

5- Simplify! Every task on your list you will have to handle. Your options are to do it, delegate it, or dump it. Take time now to simplify. Eliminate what does not serve your top 3 priorities. What can you get help on and delegate? This is a good time to get rid of those items on your Not Again list. Hire someone to do your decorating or hire a housekeeper for the month. Have everyone bring a dish instead of you doing it all yourself. Get your family involved with the attitude that things do not have to be perfect (which really means your way). Do not be afraid of letting go. This will allow you to embrace the activities that you love.

6- Set your budget. Create a budget that you feel good about. This year many people are tight on cash and watching each dollar. You are not alone. There are plenty of heartfelt ways that you can make this holiday just as special without adding stress to your budget. Think of how you can show people they are appreciated and activities you can do as a family together. Hand written cards telling those you care about how much they are appreciated is a wonderful gift. If the kids will not be getting as many gifts as usual this year, simply make it more fun. Every year I have at least one gift that the kids have to find. Wrap empty boxes inside each other. When they open the last box there is a note with a clue telling them the next step. You can get very creative with this. It is great fun!

7- Set your boundaries. Decide now what you will not tolerate. Remember your Not This Again list? Is there someone who always ropes you into things you do not want to do? Have the conversation you need to have. No is no. Keep in mind that if someone continues to ask after you have said no, then they are attempting to control you. Setting boundaries is about educating people on how they can treat you. Is there someone you need to educate?

8- Schedule one hour a week for planning and schedule time for yourself. When is a good time for you to update your task list? When can you take time for you? Put it on your calendar every week through the end of the year and keep those appointments.

9- Give in a way that gives you joy vs. out of obligation. Giving in a way that comes naturally to you is how you can share your own special gifts. When you are doing what you love life becomes effortless. If there is a situation you are dreading, think about how you can tweak it and handle it in a way that would make you happy.

10- Take action now! Begin today so that you are tying up your last bows well before the pitter patter of hoofs on the rooftop. The sooner you complete your tasks, the sooner you can sit back, smile, and enjoy!

Take one step forward to prepare for the holidays...Starting Now!

Please send your thoughts and comments. I would love to hear from you.
Copyright 2002, Beth A. Tabak. All rights reserved.

Beth Tabak is a Professional Life Coach and owner of Starting Now. She works with clients nationwide to reach their goals in a faster period of time with less stress & struggle. For more info visit http://www.cvreferral.com/2/101475.html or e-mail startingnow@ev1.net. E-mail Beth for a copy of her Holiday Task Chart.