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Get Organised Before your kids grow up
Hi!
A couple of years ago I attended a presentation from Parenting
Expert and well-known author, Stephen Biddulph on "Raising
Boys". My son, Trent was 11 at the time so I was interested to
hear what Stephen had to say. In fact, so were the 800 other
parents in the room!
The key point that I picked up on was that boys from the age of
6 -14 really need 'time' with their dads. That is the most
influential period in their lives when they bond with him. And
the type of time they need is not all thrown into a 'once a
week' or 'month' block or some exotic holiday once a year, they
need to spend time with their sons on a regular basis. Otherwise
how can you build a strong and stable relationship?
For the single mums reading this, don't despair. If you are
estranged from your partner and bringing up your son is your
responsibility, having a positive male role model in his life
i.e. uncle, brother, grandfather, teacher, tennis coach, etc.
will work as well.
What's happening in our society in the chase for the almighty
dollar and in many instances the big ego; our relationships are
breaking down. People are totally dominated by their work and
have little energy to invest in themselves and their families.
Navigating Work and Family Life In his article Navigating Work
and Family Life, another leading Parenting Expert Michael Grose
says: "... Research by Australian Institute of Family Studies
fellow Virginia Lewis supported this view of family time. Lewis
found that many children of working parents wanted to play more
and interact informally with their parents. They didn't mind if
their parents worked reasonably long hours but they resented it
if their parents came home stressed or grumpy. It seems that
many parents need a wind-down time so they can switch from work
mode to parent mode".
Planning Personal Time It's very interesting to note that every
client I have coached ... male or female, whether they are the
business owner, director, executive or whatever title they hold,
all have the same common goal... they want more time for their
personal life.
They do not want to start work at 7.30 a.m. and return home at
7.00 p.m. They are committed and enjoy what they do, however
they are not prepared to sacrifice their own relationships and
wellbeing anymore. THE PRICE IS NOT WORTH IT!
You Can Turn Your Life Around And do you know what the three key
things you need to do to turn your life around?
Learn to say
'no', how to manage your time and then take action.
That's right. Everyone tells you how busy and how little time
they have, yet most people do nothing to learn the skills that
will have a dramatic impact on their work and personal lives.
You have to plan time to get things done. Do you want to spend
more time with your family? Do you know how to plan for it? How
much time do you spend working? How much time do you invest in
yourself to learn how to be more effective? Are you hoping that
one day, work will ease off and then you can spend more time
with your family? Do you really need a bigger house, nicer car
or overseas holiday? Will that improve your relationships? Do
you think that you'll (hopefully) stumble on the secrets to
getting more time back in your life? If that's the way you live
your life, your kids will probably be all grown up and not
really need you.
Cats in the Cradle For those of you old enough to remember,
Harry Chapin recorded a song called "Cats in the Cradle". It was
about a young boy whose Dad was always busy working. He never
seemed to be available when his son wanted to be with him. Over
the years this continued until the boy became an adult. By then
his Dad had retired and had time on his hands, however his son
had now become too busy to see his Dad. He too was working and
had kids. The tables had turned. All of a sudden the Dad
realised what he had done. He was too busy caught up in his work
and missed out on his son growing up.
The Final Word For those of you who have managed to maintain a
good balance in your life, congratulations. No doubt you are
happier, healthier and more fulfilled. For the rest of you who
are unhappy, unhealthy and unfulfilled, then you need to take
action if you are serious about wanting to make changes. Do it,
because nothing changes if nothing changes!
And remember the definition of insanity - doing the same thing
and expecting a different result.
Have a great week Lorraine Pirihi
About the author:
Lorraine Pirihi is Australia's Personal Productivity Specialist
and Leading Life Coach. Her business The Office Organiser
specialises in showing small business owners and managers, how
to get organised at work so they can have a life! Lorraine is
also a dynamic speaker and has produced many products including
"How to Survive and Thrive at Work!" To subscribe to her free
ezine visit www.office-organiser.com.au
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