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An ADD Case Study: When the Pace Picks Up, Learn to Slow Down
The fall season signals a shift in most people's minds. The summer is coming to a close, and it's back to school, work, and the other things that we haven't put as much effort into since Memorial Day. Many ADDers welcome this shift, as boredom...
Anger And Your Driving
Are you driving under the influence of impaired emotions?
Dateline: December 4, 2002. Orange County ,California. A 29 year old man was shot to death, an apparent victim of road rage. According to newspaper accounts, he had a reputation for...
Oppositional Defiant Disorder
Introduction Oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) is a psychiatric behavior disorder that is characterized by aggressiveness and a tendency to purposefully bother and irritate others. These behaviors cause significant difficulties with family...
Stress and Depression are Killing Us!
A short generation ago, families could set their watch by the time the father got home from work each day. My dad always walked through the front door at precisely 6 PM and supper was served at 6:10. We'd all sit around the table...
Tips for Reducing Stress
With the hectic life that most people lead in today's world, reducing stress has become a vital skill. With work stress, school stress, family stress, teen stress, parent stress, and a whole host of other kinds of stress continually knocking on...
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Anger and The American Family: Learn to Respond Rather than React
Case #1. Brianna, 32, would get instantly outraged when her ex-husband threatened to file for custody of their two small children. Deciding to respond differently, she bit her tongue, and remained quiet when he began threatening an escalated legal battle. Unable to get the usual reaction from her, he calmed down and instantly became rational and more reasonable.
Case #2. Tom, 42, would become ballistic reacting to his 17 year old daughter who refused to see she was dating a “loser” boy. The more he yelled, the deeper she dug her heels and refused to give up the boy.
Applying the anger management tool of “respond instead of react”, Tom decided to try something different by including the boy into the family activities (as much as he could stand). After about three weeks of this, the daughter—on her own—decided her “prince-charming” wasn’t the person she needed to enhance her life and ended the relationship.
Learn to be flexible
Individuals who practice good health do not continue behavior that doesn’t achieve desired results. Instead, they adjust—or fine tune—their responses depending on the situation.
There are many advantages to learning to be more flexible—and “response-able”— in dealing with the stresses and frustrations in your life.
At the top of the list is a sense of empowerment. It just feels good to know that you are in charge of your responses, instead of being controlled by other people or circumstances.
Case # 3. Sixty-four year old Lynn left anger management class one night to find her apartment completely flooded due to a burst water pipe.
Adding to her stress, her insurance company initially refused to pay her claim. She later told us, “I decided to use the tool you taught us of responding instead of reacting, so I cleaned up the whole place myself. I can’t tell you how wonderful and liberating it felt to know that I didn’t have to get upset.
Later, calmer, she recontacted her insurance agent who, this time, agreed to honor her claim! Learn to respond differently.
Step 1: Examine your attitude.
Negative voices in your head can be quite convincing —persuading you to judge others, be pessimistic, or think negatively, while creating the destructive feelings that go along with destructive thoughts.
Try to create a louder, more persuasive voice that helps you identify an equally believable, more optimistic viewpoint.
Step 2: Regulate your emotions. There are many ways to regulate your emotions and feelings in your life, including being your own best friend, eating well, exercising, playing, listening to uplifting music, getting in touch with a spiritual system, and creating emotional connections with others by sincere listening.
Step 3: Try alternative behaviors. Behaving differently is one of the most effective ways to show response flexibility and get different results in your life.
But, doing things differently is not easy! We are all creatures of habit and we tend to continue behaving in comfortable and familiar ways.
One of the challenges in behaving differently is, of course, coming up with ideas on how else we can behave differently in various situations.
Start by understanding that much of our behavior is determined by a feeling or emotion we are having—or we wish to have. But a specific behavior does not HAVE to be connected with that feeling.
Try alternative behaviors when you get those angry feelings by asking yourself, “What are some other ways I can deal
with this situation?”
Often they include behaviors like taking a brisk walk, assertively communicating with your family member, taking a timeout, picking your battles, or listening to soothing music.
Ask yourself: What are some other ways I can deal with this situation?
2005 © Dr. Tony Fiore All rights reserved.
Dr. Tony Fiore (www.angercoach.com) is a So. California licensed psychologist, and anger management trainer. His company, The Anger Coach, provides anger and stress management programs, training and products to individuals, couples, and the workplace. Sign up for his free monthly newsletter "Taming The Anger Bee" at www.angercoach.com
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Stress Management Tips and Techniques from Mind Tools |
More than 100 stress management tips and techniques, helping you manage the job-related stress in your life. |
www.mindtools.com |
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Stress Management Techniques, Stress Relief & Stress Reduction ... |
Mind Tools helps you manage the causes of stress and teaches useful stress management techniques. |
www.mindtools.com |
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Stress Management |
Stress Management. What is Stress? Stress is the "wear and tear" our bodies experience as we adjust to our continually changing environment; it has physical ... |
www.ivf.com |
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Stress Management: Information and Resources on Stress From About.com |
Find a wide variety of stress management strategies you can use in your daily life. Learn about the causes and effects of stress, healthy and effective ... |
stress.about.com |
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Stress Management |
Links to stress management information on the web. |
www.pp.okstate.edu |
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Links to Stress Related Resources |
Return to the Stress Management and Emotional Wellness Page ... Cognitive Restructuring Approaches to Stress Management ... |
www.imt.net |
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International Stress Management Association(UK) |
The leading professional body for stress management. The ISMA website has articles from their journal Stress News, links and general advice on lifestyle and ... |
www.isma.org.uk |
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Stress Management for Patient and Physician |
Stress management for patient and physician. Stress is the most common cause of ill health, probably underlying as many as 70% of all visits to family ... |
www.mentalhealth.com |
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Stress Management: Counseling Services, University at Buffalo |
The description on stress management. ... Stress Management. Introduction Stress is a part of day to day living. As college students you may experience ... |
ub-counseling.buffalo.edu |
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Stress Management and Anxiety Relief |
Welcome to stressmanagement.co.uk - We specialise in managing your stress. |
www.stressmanagement.co.uk |
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Stress Management for effective ways to manage stress |
Our stress management services allows you to find the solutions to all types of stress. We also have professional stress management counsellors available 7 ... |
www.stressmanagement.com.au |
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Stress Management--UIUC Counseling Center |
Self-help Brochures. What is Stress? Stress is the "wear and tear" our bodies experience as we adjust to our continually changing environment; ... |
www.couns.uiuc.edu |
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The Stress Management Society |
Congratulations to taking the first step to freedom from the stress trap. This is the place to learn more about stress and its management. |
www.stress.org.uk |
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Stress management - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia |
Stress management encompasses techniques intended to equip a person with effective ... Definition of stress: Stress management defines stress precisely as a ... |
en.wikipedia.org |
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Stress |
Stress Management. Everyone experiences stress from time to time, so it is perfectly normal ... Fortunately, stress management is largely a learnable skill. ... |
www.cyberpsych.com |
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SBC Academic Resource Center | Stress Management |
With stress management training, you can learn to avoid procrastination and other stress-producing situations. Stress Quiz: How Stressed Are You? ... |
www.arc.sbc.edu |
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Mind Tools - How to Master Stress |
3. Stress Management Techniques. Raising Stress Levels - Psyching Up · Stress Reduction Techniques · Reducing Short-Term Stress - Mental Techniques ... |
www.psywww.com |
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Stress, stress management, occupational stress, stress prevention ... |
A recent survey showed that 70-90% of us feel stressed at work and outside. Unless we learn to manage stress, we will get sick. |
www.holisticonline.com |
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HSE - Stress Management Standards Homepage |
The International Stress Management Association has produced a leaflet showing how employees can work with their employers to tackle work-related stress ... |
www.hse.gov.uk |
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Stress Management Tips for Stressed and Overworked People. |
Free weekly stress management tips and relaxation CD plus practical resources for stressed people. |
www.stresstips.com |
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